Random News: September 12, 2022

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s September 12, 2022, and it’s a Monday. Here are some things that may or may not be interesting and/or relevant to you…

• Last night, the FPOTUS made an unannounced trip to Washington, D.C., and it seemed a little odd.
• He showed up there via his private jet wearing the golf clothes (including shoes) he’d been wearing, which is very unusual for him. He wasn’t accompanied by his constant entourage.
• Why is he there? It’s probably nothing. The speculation ran rampant last night that he was a) turning himself in, b) visiting Walter Reed medical center due to some illness, c) stealing more shit from the USA, d) mounting a personal insurrection, e) being reinstated as president by the My Pillow Guy, and so on.
• Twitter was pretty hilarious while this was happening. It was good entertainment for a Sunday evening.
• Perhaps the funniest speculation among many was that Trump was being traded to Russia for Brittney Griner and a third-round draft pick.
• No matter what it was, it’s far less important than what’s happening today, which is all of us rallying people to vote in the 2022 Midterm elections to protect women’s rights and not allow Republican control of Congress.
• November 8 is in 56 days.
• Electing a House or Senate controlled by the GOP could result in a nationwide ban on abortion, but that could just be the start. They have made statements about making homosexuality illegal again. Of eliminating Social Security. Of making contraception illegal. Of deciding what kind of sex should be allowed between married couples.
• If that’s the kind of country you want, I suggest you trying living in Iraq, because we don’t want those things in the USA.
• Meanwhile, the economy is improving, inflation is dropping, and people’s sense of confidence is rising. But it only keeps going if you vote on November 8. If you talk and don’t vote, you’re not doing jack shit. Vote.
• Apple is going to be releasing iOS 16 imminently. I’ll wait until all of you try it before I install it. Be my beta testers, bitches!
• I know that the death of Queen Elizabeth is still dominating the news, but… look, I get the respect and it’s all understandable and well deserved. But she’s dead. She’ll be no more dead or less dead as her body is transported to its final resting place in Westminster Abbey.
• Speaking of which, if you’ve ever been there, it’s fucking amazing. I was particularly enthralled with Poet’s Corner, especially when I looked down and saw I was standing on Geoffrey Chaucer. If you have any appreciation for history, London is a wonderful place to visit.
• And now, The Weather: “Fruiting Body” by Goon.
• From the Sports Desk… the Los Angeles Dodgers have become the first MLB team to clinch a playoff spot, though others will be joining them shortly. IN addition to their league-leading 96-43 record, the Dodgers have an incredible +310 in runs scored versus against. The second place team in this stat is the Yankees with +206.
• Also in baseball… gotta keep giving kudos to Albert Pujols. He hit his 697th home run yesterday, putting him in sole possession of fourth place on the all-time list behind Babe Ruth, Hank Aaron, and Barry Bonds*.
• You probably thought I was going to talk about NFL football. Nah. Week one has just been a “what the fuck are we doing?” fest, and I’m not able to offer any better analysis than I did before.
• Today in history…  Premiere performance of Gustav Mahler's Symphony No. 8 in Munich with a chorus of 852 singers and an orchestra of 171 players (1910). Leó Szilárd conceives the idea of the nuclear chain reaction (1933). Cave paintings are discovered in Lascaux, France (1940). The People's Republic of Korea is proclaimed, bringing an end to Japanese rule over Korea (1945). U.S. Senator and future President John Fitzgerald Kennedy marries Jacqueline Lee Bouvier (1953). Jack Kilby demonstrates the first working integrated circuit at Texas Instruments (1958). ‘Bonanza’ premieres, the first regularly scheduled TV program presented in color (1959). South African anti-apartheid activist Steve Biko dies in police custody (1977). Dwight Gooden sets the baseball record for strikeouts in a season by a rookie with 276 (1984). Hurricane Gilbert devastates Jamaica then fucks up Mexico (1988). Space Shuttle Endeavour STS-47 has Mae Carol Jemison, the first African-American woman in space, onboard (1992). NASA confirms that its Voyager 1 probe has become the first manmade object to enter interstellar space (2013).
• September 12 is the birthday of activist Samuel Joseph May (1797), weapons inventor Richard Jordan Gatling (1818), UK prime minister H. H. Asquith (1852), journalist H. L. Mencken (1880), actor Maurice Chevalier (1888), publisher Alfred A. Knopf, Sr. (1892), athlete Jesse Owens (1913), actor Ian Holm (1931), musicians George Jones (1931), singer Maria Muldaur (1943), activist Leonard Peltier (1943), singer Barry White (1944), drum god and lyricist Neil Peart (1952), composer Hans Zimmer (1957), musician Ben Folds (1966), comedian Louis C.K. (1967), actor Paul Walker (1973), singer/actress Jennifer Hudson (1981), and NFL player Andrew Luck (1989). 

I suppose that’s all for now. Who knows what today will bring? No one. It might be a great day. It might be a shit day. It might (highest likelihood) be kind of a normal day, and after the past six years or so, I appreciate normal days much more than I used to. Enjoy your day.