Random News: January 4, 2023

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s January 4, 2023, and it’s a Wednesday. I’m sure we have plenty to talk about, so let’s so that while I drink my coffee and watch the raindrops fall…

• Let’s start with the obvious: the historic public humiliation of Kevin McCarthy (R-CA).
• Yesterday was the first session of a new Congress, and typically the very first order of business is to elect a new Speaker of the House. Everything else, from swearing in new members to moving ahead on the first legislative items, happens after that.
• It’s usually a perfunctory exercise where the current party leader is easily elected. I recall Kevin McCarthy saying this summer, “I want you to watch Nancy Pelosi hand me that gavel. It will be hard not to hit her with it.”
• Hitting an 82-year-old woman with a hammer is on-brand for Republicans, of course. 
• Kevin had predicted that a massive political “Red Wave” would gain the GOP some 60 seats in the House.
• But that did not happen, thanks to you voters.
• The Republicans did gain an advantage in the House but only by a minimal amount, and that meant that Kevin needed every single vote to get elected as Speaker.
• One problem: despite him being a giant asshole, he’s simply not enough of an asshole for a number of the most hardcore right-wing ultra-MAGA congresspeople.
• So with this tiny majority, they suddenly had clout, and used it. They formed a “Never Kevin” cabal and voted for others instead of their own party leader. The Speaker requires 218 votes — a majority of the chamber — to be elected.
• The last time the Speaker wasn’t elected on the first vote? Exactly 100 years ago in 1923. Previous to that was in the Civil War era of the mid 1800s.
• The first vote tally came in with Democrat House leader Hakeem Jeffries leading with 212 votes (reflecting all 212 Democrat members), followed by 203 for Kevin McCarthy, 10 for Andy Biggs, 6 for Jim Jordan, 1 for Jim Banks, 1 for Lee Zeldin, and 1 for Byron Donalds.
• That’s 19 Republicans who stopped McCarthy. The second vote held immediately after was similar. The third vote was even worse for McCarthy, with yet another Republican yanking his support.
• The session was terminated after that, with more voting continuing today.
• So what’s going to happen next? It’s anyone’s guess. In a normal environment, I’d say that eventually, the ultra-MAGA group would be offered enough concessions that they’ll eventually cave and vote for Kevin, but in this clown show of a Congress, you can’t assign typical behavioral patterns.
• The least likely but funniest possible result would be for another six Republicans to get sick of this shit and defect, voting for Hakeem Jeffries and having a Democrat lead a Republican Congress. 
• I still believe that McCarthy will get the Speaker’s chair, but it will be fun to watch him squirm in the process.
• And now, The Weather: “Bump” by Dora Jar
• Speaking of the weather, a powerful Pacific storm is set to slam into Southern California today, prompting officials to issue evacuation warnings in some of the region’s burn scar areas.
• The event is being described as an atmospheric river or bomb cyclone by weather officials. It could bring 2 to 4 inches of rain to much of the Southland, according to the National Weather Service. The rain will continue all day but the big storm action happens this evening.
• I’ll be fine. Wet, but fine.
• In other local news, some of you will recall the controversy of “Bruce’s Beach”, an area in Manhattan Beach, CA (about three miles from my home) that had been stolen from Black owners in 1924.
• The property was given back to the heirs of the owners last year. Yesterday, they agreed to sell the beachfront land back to L.A. County for $20 million. I’m happy for them.
• From the Sports Desk… it’s really hard to stay focused on the upcoming NFL playoffs with the continuing tragedy of Damar Hamlin’s mid-game heart stoppage. Doctors are still trying to get Hamlin to breathe on his own. He remains sedated and on a ventilator.
• The sports implication, though, is that the game between the Bills and Bengals does need to be completed to have a final playoff ranking. The NFL has yet to reschedule that game, in which Cincinnati was leading 7-3 in the first quarter.
• News has come out that the NFL had instructed the game to continue, and that the players and coaches told them to rightfully fuck off.
• Today in history… The Netherlands, Great Britain, and France sign the Triple Alliance (1717). After having been kidnapped and sold into slavery in the American South, Solomon Northup regains his freedom; his memoir ‘Twelve Years a Slave’ later becomes a national bestseller (1853). Utah is admitted as the 45th U.S. state (1896). Rose Heilbron becomes the first female judge to sit at the Old Bailey in London, UK (1972). Former professional wrestler Jesse Ventura is sworn in as governor of Minnesota (1999). Spirit, a NASA Mars rover, lands successfully on Mars at 04:35 UTC (2004). The 110th United States Congress convenes, electing Nancy Pelosi as the first female Speaker of the House in U.S. history (2007). The Burj Khalifa, the current tallest building in the world, officially opens in Dubai (2010). 
• January 4 is the birthday of mythologist Jacob Grimm (1785), educator Louis Braille (1809), circus performer General Tom Thumb (1838), Japan prime minister Katsura Tarō (1848), writer/activist Max Eastman (1883), engineer/businessman Leroy Grumman (1895), pianist/composer Lionel Newman (1916), actress Barbara Rush (1927), NFL coach Don Shula (1930), boxer Floyd Patterson (1935), actress Dyan Cannon (1937), guitarist John McLaughlin (1942), singer-songwriter Patty Loveless (1957), actor Matt Frewer (1958), and singer-songwriter Michael Stipe (1960).

Always more to say, but I’ll stop there for now. Enjoy your day.