Random News: March 4, 2023

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s March 4, 2023, and it’s a Saturday. I’ve got my coffee, I’ve got my robe, let’s find out what’s up on this great big globe…

• Um…
• Yeah, there’s not much happening.
• Okay, here’s a thing.
• A Pennsylvania woman who disappeared more than 30 years ago and was believed to be dead by her family was recently found living in a nursing home in Puerto Rico, her family and police said at a news conference Thursday.
• Patricia Kopta, 83, was last seen in Pittsburgh in the summer of 1992, according to a missing person flier posted by the Pennsylvania Emergency Response Center.
• Okay then.
• In other news, tens of thousands of Texans from the bustling Dallas-Fort Worth area routinely drive across the Red River to gamble in glitzy, Las Vegas-style tribal casinos or to relax at cabins or swim and ski in lakes that dot southern Oklahoma.
• But soon, they could come north for another draw: recreational marijuana.
• Oklahoma voters will decide Tuesday whether to approve a ballot measure that legalizes recreational weed for adults 21 and older. Industry proponents hope an influx of Texas consumers will be a boon for a market that's become saturated.
• Get those Texans high so they’ll mellow the fuck out, please.
• And now, The Weather: “Always” by Chelsea Days
• Lotta storms and stuff. Power outages. Floods. Winds. Stay safe. Be warm.
• A former Colorado clerk who has become a hero to election conspiracy theorists was convicted yesterday of a misdemeanor obstruction charge for trying to prevent authorities from taking an iPad she allegedly used to videotape a court hearing.
• The case is separate from Tina Peters’ alleged involvement in a security breach of voting machines.
• Get her ass.
• A US appeals court has ruled that the word “gruyere” is a common label for cheese and cannot be reserved just for the kind made originally in France or Switzerland.
• The other option was to call it “sparkling cheese”. No, I made that up.
• I like gruyere. It melts like a mofo.
• It’s daylight savings next weekend. I’ll talk about that more in coming days.
• Today in history… Christopher Columbus arrives back in Lisbon, Portugal, aboard his ship Niña from his voyage to what are now The Bahamas and other islands in the Caribbean (1493). The Massachusetts Bay Colony is granted a Royal charter (1628). In New York City, the first Congress of the United States meets, putting the United States Constitution into effect (1789). Vermont is admitted to the United States as the fourteenth state (1791). The 11th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution is passed by the U.S. Congress (1794). John Adams is inaugurated as the 2nd President of the United States of America, becoming the first President to begin his presidency on March 4 (1797). The city of Chicago is incorporated (1837). The United States Department of Labor is formed (1913). Jeannette Rankin of Montana becomes the first female member of the United States House of Representatives (1917). Franklin D. Roosevelt becomes the 32nd President of the United States, becoming the last president to be inaugurated on March 4 (1933). The USAAF begins a daylight bombing campaign of Berlin (1944). In an interview in the London Evening Standard, The Beatles' John Lennon declares that the band is "more popular than Jesus now” (1966). The Food and Drug Administration approves a blood test for HIV infection, used since then for screening all blood donations in the United States (1985). The Supreme Court of the United States rules that federal laws banning on-the-job sexual harassment also apply when both parties are the same sex (1998). 
• March 4 is the birthday of violinist/composer Antonio Vivaldi (1678), painter William Payne (1760), football player/coach Knute Rockne (1888), actress Paula Prentiss (1938), singer-songwriter Bobby Womack (1944), actress Catherine O’Hara (1954), politician Tina Smith (1958), boxer Ray Mancini (1961), bass player Jason Newsted (1963), 

Okay then. Time to shower and dress and be like a human person. Enjoy your day.