DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.
Good morning. It’s July 27, 2023, and it’s Thursday for some reason. I’ve got a big cup of Peet’s and I like my news like I like my coffee: fresh, hot, and in a large mug. Let’s go…
- Something weird happened to Mitch McConnell yesterday.
- He had just started speaking at a press conference and then just… stopped. He was in mid-sentence, froze, and stared vacantly into space for about 20 seconds.
- His colleagues finally asked if he was okay, then led him away. McConnell later returned to the press conference and answered questions from the press.
- Asked about what happened, McConnell said he was “fine.” He did not elaborate.
- That didn’t seem fine to me. That seemed like a stroke.
- Mitch has done some terrible things to this country, perhaps most egregiously when he held up the nomination of Obama’s would-be final Supreme Court justice, which ended up causing the country to be where it is now, with a radical right-wing court that took away reproductive health rights for hundreds of millions of Americans.
- Being a decent person, I still don’t want to watch the guy stroke out on live TV.
- Moving on…
- Here’s some international news you never want to see: soldiers in Niger have announced a coup, imposing a curfew and closing borders in a country that is a key U.S. ally in West Africa.
- It’s never good when a democratically-elected leader is overthrown by military force.
- Niger’s President Mohamed Bazoum had been effectively held hostage all day by members of the presidential guard. Soldiers went on state television after midnight there and announced the coup, saying the country's constitution has been dissolved and all institutions suspended.
- The U.S. has drone bases in Niger, a country that has had four coups since gaining independence from France in 1960 and numerous attempted takeovers, including against Bazoum.
- In other news…
- Hunter Biden, the son of Joe Biden, made a court appearance about his failure to pay taxes and his ownership of a gun. If he’s guilty, hopefully he’ll be sentenced appropriately.
- No one is above the law.
- But to be clear, I don’t care about the non-elected family of politicians. I don’t care what Hunter Biden does or doesn’t do any more than I care about the actions of Amy Carter or Sasha Obama or Tricia Nixon Cox.
- I guess that’s all the news. Oh wait… there is that small matter of the USA being in contact with aliens for decades.
- Retired Air Force intelligence officer Major David Grusch testified yesterday to Congress, saying that the U.S. is concealing a longstanding program that retrieves and reverse engineers unidentified flying objects.
- The Pentagon has denied his claims. I’ll bet they did!
- Grusch spoke before a House Oversight subcommittee. Democrats and Republicans in recent years have pushed for more research as a national security matter due to concerns that sightings observed by pilots may be tied to U.S. adversaries.
- Do I believe that in our vast universe that there is not only life off our one little planet but also advanced intelligent life? Yes, 100% yes. Space is too big for us to be the only ones here.
- Do I believe that intelligent extraterrestrial aliens have visited Earth, or that our government has been using their technology to do things like fly to the Moon less than 100 years after inventing the light bulb?
- I mean, it’s not out of the range of possibilities. But without any actual evidence of such, I’ll just assume that weird things happen for various reasons that not everyone gets to understand.
- Moving on…
- A cop in Ohio has no job today after having his canine partner maul a Black man after he’d surrendered to authorities with his hands raised.
- "Officer Speakman did not meet the standards and expectations we hold for our police officers. Officer Speakman has been terminated from the department, effective immediately.”
- Police dogs and their handlers do amazing work. But the standards of any use of force by law enforcement have to be stringent, and having your dog attack a guy who has surrendered and has his hands up?
- No. That’s fucked up. It also makes the good cops out there look bad and lessens public trust in policing. Fuck Officer Speakman.
- In other news…
- Governor Gretchen Whitmer of Michigan continues to impress me. I think she’s someone to keep an eye on as a future presidential candidate.
- Yesterday she signed two bills banning so-called conversion therapy, a scientifically discredited practice intended to change a person’s sexual orientation, for minors in the state.
- “As a mom of a member of the community and a proud, lifelong ally, I’m grateful that today we’re banning the horrific practice of conversion therapy in Michigan. In doing so, we are taking action to make Michigan a more welcoming, inclusive place.”
- The governor’s approval of the measures makes Michigan the 22nd state to ban “conversion therapy,” according to the Trevor Project, a nonprofit organization focused on suicide prevention efforts among LGBTQ youth.
- Moving on…
- An 11-year-old Florida girl has been arrested and charged with a felony after falsely reporting that her friend had been kidnapped.
- Why would she do that? Because of a stupid fucking YouTube challenge. She told police she thought it would be funny.
- Please, I beg you: monitor your younger kids’ use of social media. This could have been disastrous. The alert prompted multiple deputies from Volusia -- along with Edgewater, New Smyrna Beach and Port Orange police, as well as Volusia's aviation unit, Air One -- to search for the falsely-reported suspect vehicle.
- And now, The Weather: “dazies” by yeule
- Rest in peace to Sinéad O’Connor, one of the greatest and most misunderstood voices of her generation. She has died at age 56. No cause of death was given.
- Sinéad first gained international fame at age 20 with her album ‘The Lion and the Cobra’ and then exploded into fame in 1990, thanks to her stunning cover of Prince’s “Nothing Compares 2 U”.
- 56 is so young. It’s just a couple of years older than me. Wanna talk about age?
- Here’s a list of people who are 80 years old.
- Andy Summers (guitarist - The Police), Barbra Streisand (singer/actress), Brian Wilson (singer-songwriter/musician - the Beach Boys), Christopher Walken (actor), Eric Idle (actor/comedian), Harrison Ford (actor), Joe Biden (president. USA), Joe Namath (NFL legend), Joe Pesci (actor), Martin Scorsese (film director), Mick Jagger (singer - The Rolling Stones), Paul McCartney (singer-songwriter/musician, The Beatles). And Robert De Niro (actor) turns 80 in August.
- 80 doesn’t seem quite as old as it once did, eh? But then there’s Mitch McConnell (81). I guess there’s a variety of people and how well they are at various ages.
- Let’s talk about things that happen in small towns, like that Aldean guy mentions in his little song.
- A teenager was brutally attacked and left unconscious with a broken nose by a group of several men at a country music festival in Cullman, Alabama on Saturday night.
- Reid Watts, 18, attended the “Rock the South” music festival with a group of his friends when a fellow concertgoer accused him of spilling a drink on them, which eventually led to the teen getting beaten up by a large group of 30- to 40-year-old men.
- That’s how they do it in a small town. Beat up the defenseless for no reason.
- From the Sports Desk… in the FIFA Women’s World Cup, the USWNT had to fight for a draw against a tough Netherlands team. The final score was 1-1.
- Midfielder Lindsey Horan scored the tying goal.
- Today in history… Siward invades Scotland and defeats Macbeth north of the Firth of Forth (1054). England requires all goods bound for American colonies must be sent on English ships from English ports (1663). The Second Continental Congress passes legislation establishing "an hospital for an army consisting of 20,000 men,” establishing the U.S. Army Medical Department (1775). The USA establishes its first federal government agency, the Department of Foreign Affairs, later renamed the Department of State (1789). Maximilien Robespierre is arrested after encouraging the execution of more than 17,000 "enemies of the Revolution” (1794). The first transatlantic telegraph cable is completed, running from Ireland to Newfoundland (1866). Vincent van Gogh shoots himself and dies two days later (1890). The Chicago Race Riot erupts after a racial incident occurred on a South Side beach, leading to 38 fatalities and 537 injuries over a five-day period (1919). Researchers at the University of Toronto prove that the hormone insulin regulates blood sugar (1921). A cartoon called ‘A Wild Hare’ is released starring a new character named Bugs Bunny (1940). The US, China, and North Korea sign an armistice agreement ending the Korean War (1953). 5,000 more US military advisors are sent to Vietnam bringing the total to 21,000 (1964). The House Judiciary Committee votes 27-11 to impeach Richard Nixon for obstruction of justice (1974). Belarus declares independence from the Soviet Union (1990). A pipe bomb explodes at Centennial Olympic Park in Atlanta (1996).
- July 27 is the birthday of Shingon Buddhism founder Kūkai (774), Earl of Sandwich Edward Montagu (1625), pilot/engineer Geoffrey de Havilland (1882), actor Keenan Wynn (1916), writer/producer Norman Lear (1922), game designer Gary Gygax (1938), singer-songwriter Bobbie Gentry (1944), figure skater Peggy Fleming (1948), singer Maureen McGovern (1949), drummer Bobby Rondinelli (1955), singer-songwriter Julianna Hatfield (1967), wrestler Triple H (1969), actress Maya Rudolph (1972), singer-songwriter/guitarist Pete Yorn (1974), MLB player Alex Rodriguez (1975), MLB player Max Scherzer (1984), NFL player Ryan Tannehill (1988), and golfer Jordan Spieth (1993).
Time for me to do things that aren’t this thing. Enjoy your day.
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