Random News: August 1, 2023

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s August 1, 2023, and it’s a Tuesday. I had a night full of weird dreams and far too many instances of waking up to pee. You didn’t need to know that; not sure why I wrote it but I rarely (if ever) edit my flow of random thoughts here, so why start now? Let’s do some news…

• Rabbit rabbit rabbit.
• It’s the first day of a new month. This month was originally named Sextilis in Latin because it was the 6th month in the original ten-month Roman calendar. In 8 BC, it was renamed in honor of Emperor Augustus, and it’s been August ever since.
• Okay, actual news now…
• Memphis, TN police were called to the Margolin Hebrew Academy yesterday afternoon after an armed man tried to enter the school.
• Police say the suspect tried to enter the building but couldn’t get inside. When he could not gain entry to the Jewish school, he fired shots outside. Thankfully no one was injured. The shooter left in a Ram truck.
• A short time later, Memphis police officers found a vehicle matching the description and stopped the driver. The suspect got out of the truck with a gun in his hand and was shot by an officer, and is in critical condition.
• There are reports that the shooter was a former student at the school, and the quick action of those who didn’t allow him inside and the cops who apprehended him may have prevented a mass shooting of children and instructors.
• Moving on…
• Today very well might be Indictment Day for Donald John Trump… again. When you commit as many crimes as that guy, it’s similar to Groundhog Day.
• Why today? The grand jury investigating his actions regarding his false election claims and his role in the January 6 failed coup attempt have met on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Trump himself predicted that charges could come “any day now.”
• That grand jury has convened this morning in Washington's federal courthouse. I’d better hurry with whatever I’m going to write here.
• In other news…
• President Biden has decided to keep the headquarters for U.S. Space Command in Colorado, reversing a decision then-President Donald Trump made in his final days in office to move the command to Alabama.
• Biden made the decision at the recommendation of military officials who said it would be better for readiness to keep the command where it is, instead of taking the time and resources to outfit a new headquarters. 
• I have to wonder if Sen. Tommy Tuberville’s (R-AL) holding up of all military confirmation had anything to do with that? Hmm.
• Let’s move on…
• Leprosy is becoming endemic in the southeastern United States, rising evidence from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention shows.  
• A research letter from the CDC says Central Florida accounted for 81% of cases reported in Florida and almost one-fifth of cases reported across the U.S.
• Leprosy is a bacterial infection that’s typically spread through extended close contact with an untreated infected person. Casual contact does not lead to infection — you can't catch leprosy from shaking hands, hugging or sitting next to someone during a meal or on the bus.
• Gross.
• Let’s do some really good news.
• The Wisconsin Supreme Court which came within one vote of trying to overturn President Joe Biden’s narrow win in the state in 2020 flips to liberal control for the first time in 15 years today.
• Justice Janet Protasiewicz will mark the start of her term with a swearing-in ceremony in the state Capitol Rotunda. Her win carries tremendous weight in Wisconsin, a battleground where the state Supreme Court has been the last word on some of the biggest political and policy battles of the past decade-plus.
• More battles over voting rules and elections in Wisconsin are expected leading up to 2024, along with challenges to the state’s abortion ban, Republican-drawn political boundary lines and a host of other hot-button political issues.
• And now, The Weather: “Holy Team” by Being Dead 
• Rest in peace to Paul Reubens, better known as his character Pee-wee Herman, who died of cancer at age 70. A lot of people never quite understood Reubens, or only associated him with one poor choice he made in an adult film theater.
• But he was a huge cultural icon who delighted generations of children and adults with his positivity, whimsy, and belief in the importance of kindness. I stand behind all of those things. He will be greatly missed.
• In the “Ridiculous Controversy” file, a zoo in eastern China is denying accusations that some of its bears were people dressed in costume after videos of a Malayan sun bear standing on its hind legs – and looking uncannily human – went viral, fueling rumors and conspiracy theories on Chinese social media.
• The zoo released a statement… from the bear.
• “I’m Angela the sun bear – I got a call after work yesterday from the head of the zoo asking if I was being lazy and skipped work today and found a human to take my place. Let me reiterate again to everyone that I am a sun bear – not a black bear, not a dog – a sun bear!”
• Well, that settles that.
• I mentioned that I spent the entirety of last weekend looking through genealogical records and building out my family tree via Ancestry. Here are a couple of highlights… and lowlights.
• My most evil relative, it would seem is my 10th great grandfather Sir George Jeffreys, 1st Baron Jeffreys (1645-1689). He was known as as "The Hanging Judge” and during the reign of King James II, rose to the position of Lord Chancellor.
• He was a real prick, sentencing many people to death and torture. During the Glorious Revolution, when James II fled the country, Jeffreys stayed in London until the last moment, being the only high legal authority remaining to perform political duties. He eventually tried to escape, got captured, and died in the Tower of London.
• My 5th great grandfather was Captain George Ball (1752-1825). He served admirably in the American Revolution, and his dad Moses Ball (1717-1792) worked as a surveyor with his neighbor, General (later President) George Washington.
• Washington mentions Moses Ball in his diary several times. On Friday, April 22, 1785, he states: "Took an early breakfast at Abbington and accompanied by Dr. Stewart and Lund Washington, and having sent for Mr. Moses Ball, who attended, I went to the corner of the above land, and after having run one course and part of another, my servant William fell and broke the pan of his knee, which put a stop to his surveying. There was much difficulty in getting him home."
• Crazy. So far, I have found relatives going back to the late 1400s, and I’m not close to done. I actually have a specific reason for my sudden interest in my genes, but I’ll save that story for another time.
• From the Sports Desk… the USWNT played to a 0-0 draw in the FIFA Women’s World Cup. Honestly, this is why I don’t watch soccer.
• The US ladies will make the round of 16 final teams, but with the way they’re playing, I wouldn’t count on a three-peat. I wish them the best regardless. USA!
• Today in history… Octavian enters Alexandria and Marc Antony kills himself (30 BC). Justinian I become sole ruler of the Byzantine Empire (527). Christopher Columbus “discovers” Venezuela (1498). British scientist Joseph Priestley discovers oxygen gas (1774). Slavery is abolished in the British Empire (1834). Colorado is admitted as the 38th state (1876). Henry Perky patents shredded wheat (1893). Harriet Quimby becomes the first woman with an aviator certificate (1911). Four antifascist activists are executed by the Nazis (1933). The Olympics opened in Berlin with a ceremony presided over by Adolf Hitler (1936). The Warsaw Uprising against the Nazi German occupation breaks out in Warsaw, Poland (1944). Guam is organized as an unincorporated territory of the United States as the President Harry S. Truman signs the Guam Organic Act (1950). The United States and Canada form the North American Aerospace Defense Command, aka NORAD (1957). Islamabad is declared the capital of Pakistan (1960). Frank Herbert’s book ‘Dune’ is published for the first time (1965). George Harrison’s ‘Concert for Bangladesh’ is held at Madison Square Garden (1971). Vigdís Finnbogadóttir of Iceland becomes the world’s first democratically-elected female head of state (1980). MTV begins broadcasting in the USA (1981). 
• August 1 in the birthday of Roman emperor Claudius (10 BC), painter Sebastiano Ricci (1659), explorer/politician William Clark (1770), lawyer/poet Francis Scott Key (1779), novelist Herman Melville (1819), astronomer Helen Sawyer Hogg (1905), actor Dom DeLuise (1933), fashion designer Yves Saint Laurent (1936), singer-songwriter/guitarist Jerry Garcia (1942), singer-songwriter/guitarist Robert Cray (1953), actor Taylor Negron (1957), singer-songwriter Joe Elliott (1959), songwriter/rapper Chuck D (1960), rapper Coolio (1963), director Sam Mendes (1965), singer-songwriter/guitarist Dhani Harrison (1978), actor Jason Momoa (1979), MLB player Madison Bumgarner (1989), and NBA player Austin Rivers (1992).

Okay. That’s it for now. If that Orange Prick gets indicted today, i’ll cover that tomorrow. Enjoy your day.