Random News: November 2, 2024

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s November 2, 2024, and it’s a Saturday. I’m here in my blue bathrobe, drinking coffee. There is definitely a “calm before the storm” vibe going, so hopefully next weekend I’m still here in my robe and not in a kevlar helmet and a bulletproof vest.

• The election is this Tuesday, November 5. That’s in three days. I know you knew that. I just thought I’d get it out of the way.
• You have much to lose by not voting, and a lot to gain by voting. If you don’t vote, I want you to think about the people who will be doing the voting for you.
• They very well may not have your best interests at heart. Some of them are actively conspiring against you… your gender, our nationality, your ethnicity, your religion, your sexual orientation, your age. There are many factors that make you who you are.
• And some people want to make who you are illegal and make it easier for you to be persecuted, treated unfairly, and punished just for the crime of being you.
• Don’t let them do it Stand up for yourself and vote.
• I know that many of you want a solid answer about who’s going to win, and you want it today.
• No one knows that answer. No pollster, no pundit, no one who “just has a strong feeling.”
• Trump could win. Harris could win. Either of them could win the popular vote and lose the electoral vote, or vice-versa. There is no way right now to predict with any degree of certainty who will win.
• It could be decided in a landslide and we go to sleep on Tuesday night knowing who the next President of the USA will be. That’s… unlikely, but you never know.
• In a situation where vote counts are very close in one or more states, it could take days or even weeks, and there might be court cases to content with before we know for sure.
• So my advice — to myself and everyone around me — is to chill. Do your part, vote, encourage others to vote. And that’s it.
• Don’t lie awake at night worrying about something you can’t control. Whatever happens in the election, good or bad, is what will happen, and we will plan and act accordingly after it’s done.
• For now, just make sure you vote. That’s it. That’s what you can do to help yourself, your friends, your family, and the future. Vote.
• Let’s do some news.
• A reminder that daylight saving time ends tonight. Set your clocks back an hour before you go to bed.
• All of your “smart” things… your computers, your phone, and so on will just set themselves. Your car? Probably not. That cheap-ass alarm clock you bought off Amazon for $11.99? Definitely not.
• Anyway, don’t let anyone say you get an “extra” hour. There are no extra hours. And time is a human construct anyway.
• Ask someone to tell you what time actually is. 99% of people have no idea, or can only give a vague response that only explains what it does, rather than what it is.
• I can tell you what it is… but not why it is. Best not to worry about it, frankly.
• Okay, now some news.
• Yesterday, the Justice Department said it will send election monitors to 86 jurisdictions in 27 states on Tuesday, the most in two decades amid growing fears of improper partisan influence and voter suppression.
• I don’t blame them.
• Since 1965 and the enactment of the Voting Rights Act, the Justice Department has dispatched government officials into polling sites to ensure fair ballot access for vulnerable populations — including racial minorities, disabled people, and those with limited English-language ability — and to protect against unlawful partisan influence.
• Democratic and Republican administrations have monitored elections for potential voting rights irregularities for decades.
• But officials in some Republican-led states have warned they might attempt to ban federal authorities from entering polling sites on Election Day.
• Fucking assholes.
• Florida Secretary of State, Republican Cord Byrd, said he would ban federal authorities from entering polling sites in the four counties from his state — Broward, Miami-Dade, Orange, and Osceola.
• And in the same breath he said that his office plans to send his own state monitors to polling sites in the same counties.
• Douchebag prick.
• All seven of the nation’s most closely contested swing states are represented on the list, with monitors planning to visit six counties in Michigan, five in Georgia, four in Wisconsin and Arizona, three in Pennsylvania and North Carolina, and one in Nevada.
• Monitors also will be present in a mix of red and blue states, including California, Florida, Maryland, Missouri, Ohio, and Virginia. Texas and Massachusetts have the most jurisdictions on the list with eight apiece.
• Jurisdictions where monitors will be sent are selected based on factors that include requests from local officials, federal court settlements, and areas with fast-changing demographics.
• I am more and more glad for being an early voter. Fuck all that crazy shit.
• Let’s move on.
• Yesterday, the U.S. Supreme Court left in place a lower court ruling that allows Pennsylvania voters to cast provisional ballots if their mail-in ballots have been invalidated.
• That’s good.
• Since 2019, all Pennsylvania voters have been able to cast ballots by mail, but to have their mail ballots counted, they have to follow strict rules laid out in the state election code. One of those rules requires voters to place their ballot into a “secrecy envelope” before placing it into the mailing envelope. Without the secrecy envelope, the ballot is considered “naked” and will not be counted.
• After two voters in the 2024 primary election were notified that their ballots would not be counted because they had not put their ballots in the secrecy envelope, the voters went to the polls on Election Day to cast provisional ballots.
• But Butler County refused to count their votes. The voters sued, arguing that the Board of Elections was obligated to count their provisional ballots. The Republican National Committee and the Butler County Board of Elections countered that under the state election code provisional ballots cast by those whose mail ballots were received on time cannot be counted, even if the mail ballots were deemed invalid.
• In a 4-3 decision, Pennsylvania’s Supreme Court sided with the voters. The court determined that a naked ballot is automatically void, meaning it was never received or counted by the Board of Elections. Under that logic, if the ballot was never received, a voter is eligible to cast a provisional ballot.
• So yesterday, the Supreme Court declined to intervene, leaving in place the Pennsylvania Supreme Court ruling that allows provisional votes to be cast and counted when a “naked” mail-in ballot is invalidated.
• Moving on.
• Why was Dumpy simulating sex acts with his microphone at a rally?
• We already know how he’s obsessed with penises. His previous rally, where his main point was the size of the late golfer Arnold Palmer’s dick, was a good indication of how this old man thinks about dicks all the time.
• But last night in Milwaukee, as he had problems with his microphone, he began to sexually stroke it, and then pretended to perform oral sex on it.
• What the actual fuck? Why do you want this guy? I have suspicions about a good number of Dump voters that become more and more confirmed as time goes by.
• In other news…
• Information has come to light of yet another pregnant woman who died because of a state’s abortion laws that went into effect after the overturn of Roe v. Wade by Dump’s hand-selected Supreme Court.
• Nevaeh Crain, 18, had gone to two different emergency rooms within 12 hours in October 2023, each time returning home feeling worse than before. Crain was only diagnosed with strep throat upon her first visit. The hospital did not investigate her sharp abdominal cramps.
• Medical records indicate Crain tested positive for sepsis, a potentially life-threatening condition, on her second visit. But doctors still cleared her to leave after apparently confirming that her six-month-old fetus still had a heartbeat.
• These incidents are seen as evidence of a new reality in which US healthcare professionals in states with new tough abortion restrictions are hesitant or even afraid to give care to pregnant mothers over fear of legal repercussions.
• Texas’s abortion ban threatens prison time for interventions that end a fetal heartbeat, regardless of whether the pregnancy is wanted or not.
• Please vote for Kamala Harris, who will push for and pass legislation to guarantee the right of reproductive health care for women in all 50 states. thank you.
• Moving on.
• Yesterday, a judge rejected Elon Musk’s attempt to move to federal court a lawsuit challenging his $1 million daily giveaways to registered voters in swing states, enabling a hearing to proceed before Election Day. 
• Seems a bit too late to me, but if Elmo is culpable of a crime, he should definitely face justice, regardless of when it comes.
• The Philadelphia district attorney sued the billionaire and his pro-Trump super PAC on Monday, urging the court to immediately halt the sweepstakes and alleging that America PAC’s daily $1 million giveaways are an “illegal lottery” under Pennsylvania state law. 
• And the Department of Justice had also warned the super PAC that its giveaways could violate a federal law against paying people to register to vote.
• Asshole.
• Let’s do some more good news.
• Late yesterday, a federal jury convicted former Kentucky police detective Brett Hankison of using excessive force on Breonna Taylor during the botched 2020 drug raid that left her dead.
• The six man, six woman jury had deliberated for more than 20 hours over three days.  
• Taylor’s mother, Tamika Palmer, celebrated the verdict outside the federal courthouse, saying, “It took a lot of time. It took a lot of patience. It was hard. The jurors took their time to really understand that Breonna deserved justice.”
• I also appreciate when justice is served. Sometimes it takes awhile.
• In international news…
• Kemi Badenoch, the new leader of Britain’s right-of-center Conservative Party, is the first Black woman to lead a major UK political party.
• She was born Olukemi Adegoke in London in 1980 to well-off Nigerian parents, and spent much of her childhood in the West African country.
• Shrug. I mean, I’m glad to see more women and people of color represented in political leadership around the world.
• It seems strange to me that those people would want to represent the political ideologies that have traditionally treated them as second-class citizens compared to white men, but maybe the very act of infiltrating those parties will help end the practice.
• I don’t know.
• Today is the Day of the Dead, or Día de Muertos. 
• The holiday involves family and friends gathering to pay respects and remember friends and family members who have died.
• One thing I like about the holiday — which is widely observed in Mexico but is also observed in other places, especially by people of Mexican heritage — is that rather than somber and sad events, the celebrations often take a humorous tone, as celebrants remember amusing events and anecdotes about the departed.
• And now, The Weather: “ROCKMAN” by Mk.gee
• From the Sports Desk… if you’re keeping an eye on NFL games this Sunday, the ones with the biggest point spreads include Raiders at Bengals (-7), Saints (-7) at Panthers, Jaguars at Eagles (-7.5), and Bucs at Chiefs (-9).
• Today in history… North Dakota and South Dakota are admitted as the 39th and 40th U.S. states (1889). The Russian Empire declares war on the Ottoman Empire (1914). KDKA of Pittsburgh starts broadcasting as the first commercial radio station (1920). The British Broadcasting Corporation initiates the BBC Television Service, the world's first regular, "high-definition" - then defined as at least 200 lines - service (1936). Howard Hughes performs the only flight of the Hughes H-4 Hercules, also known as the "Spruce Goose” (1947). Game show contestant Charles Van Doren admits to a Congressional committee that he had been given questions and answers in advance (1959). Penguin Books is found not guilty of obscenity in the trial 'R v Penguin Books Ltd’, the ‘Lady Chatterley's Lover’ case (1960). Ronald Reagan signs a bill creating Martin Luther King, Jr. Day (1983). The Chicago Cubs defeat the Cleveland Indians in the World Series, ending the longest Major League Baseball championship drought at 108 years (2016).
• November 2 is the birthday of English king Edward V (1470), hunter/explorer Daniel Boone (1734), French queen consort Marie Antoinette (1755), US president James K. Polk (1795), physician John Light Atlee (1795), inventor John J. Loud (1844), US president Warren G. Harding (1865), actor Burt Lancaster (1913), actor Ray Walston (1914), music producer Rudy Van Gelder (1924), engineer/businessman Amar Bose (1929), saxophonist/composer Phil Woods (1931), sexologist Shere Hite (1942), keyboardist/composer Keith Emerson (1944), singer-songwriter/guitarist J. D. Souther (1945), drummer/composer Carter Beauford (1957), MLB player Willie McGee (1958), singer-songwriter k. d. lang (1961), politician Brian Kemp (1963), actor David Schwimmer (1966), singer-songwriter Kurt Elling (1967), rapper Nelly (1974), NFL player Jimmy Garoppolo (1991), and NFL player Jordan Love (1998).

Do you need some advice on not allowing election anxiety to get the best of you? I offer none. There’s a reason why the saying “ignorance is bliss” exists, and one of the prices you pay by being aware of what’s going on around you is a sense of uneasiness at times like these. But I will say this: I remain optimistic, and that allows me to go about my day and be productive. And now I will take a shower and get dressed and do things. Enjoy your day.