Random News: December 20, 2022

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s December 20, 2022, and it’s a Tuesday. Got a batch of various things lined up in my mind, and now I have to wiggle my fingers and send them to your brain through your eyes…

• There was a large earthquake last night in Northern California. A 6.4 struck the Eureka area, and it definitely caused some serious damage to homes and roads. Thousands are without power.
• A little reminder: California is very big. So no, I didn’t feel it. I am roughly 700 miles south of there.
• But having been through the 1994 Northridge quake which was a 6.7, I know how scary and dangerous a big quake can be. Sending positive vibes to my friends up there.
• The final session of the House select committee investigating the January 6 failed coup attempt wrapped up yesterday.
• The committee has recommended that the Department of Justice investigate Donald John Trump a) for inciting an insurrection, b) conspiracy to defraud the United States, c) conspiracy to make a false statement, and d) obstruction of an official proceeding.
• As I’ve mentioned here roughly 742,000 times before, this is meaningless on its own. The DOJ is not required to look into referrals from congressional committees.
• And, of course, the DOJ is conducting its own investigation into the Capitol riot that was recently put under the purview of an independent special counsel named Jack Fucking Smith.
• Perhaps more tangible was the recommendation of a formal ethics inquiry into House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (R-CA), Jim Jordan (R-OH), Scott Perry (R-PA) and Andy Biggs (R-AZ) for their refusal to cooperate with the probe.
• All four of them had been requested to first appear voluntarily, and then subpoenaed for their testimony. None obeyed either directive.
• Will anything ever happen? Will any politician who helped inspire and/or orchestrate the January 6 insurrection be punished in any way? I’ll go, optimistically, with “probably yes”.
• Moving on.
• Meet George Santos, a newly-elected Republican congressional rep from New York.
• During his campaign, George’s biography said that he had received degrees in finance and economics from Baruch College and New York University.
• However, neither school has anyone listed by his name as having ever attended.
• Santos’ campaign biography also included mention of experience at financial firms Citigroup and Goldman Sachs. Neither firm has any record of his employment.
• There’s more, but long story short, everything he claimed to be… he’s not, and never was. This guy just straight-up lied his way into Congress and will likely get away with it.
• Fuck you, George.
• Epic Games, maker of Fortnite among many other popular games (and owner of the Bandcamp music distribution platform), has agreed to pay a total of $520 million to settle US government allegations that it misled millions of players, including children and teens, into making unintended purchases.
• Within that amount, Epic will pay $275 million to the US government to resolve claims it violated the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) by gathering the personal information of kids under the age of 13 without first receiving their parents’ verifiable consent.
• It is the largest fine the FTC has ever imposed. Good. Fuck them.
• Speaking of kids, guns are now the number one killer of children in the U.S., surpassing car crashes and being miles ahead of cancer, suffocation and drug overdoses.
• Gun death rates for children have been rising for years, and in 2020 guns became the leading cause of death for those ages 1 to 18 and have remained so since (and continues to rise).
• You cannot love children and love guns. It is mutually exclusive. Pick one or the other and live with your decision.
• And now, The Weather: “Anything” by Sharon Van Etten
• In the “things that make grown men cry” folder, NASA’s InSight Mars lander, which has been on the red planet working hard since November 26, 2018, tweeted the following message yesterday…
• “My power’s really low, so this may be the last image I can send. Don’t worry about me though: my time here has been both productive and serene. If I can keep talking to my mission team, I will – but I’ll be signing off here soon. Thanks for staying with me.”
• InSight’s planned mission duration was for 728 days. It went far beyond our expectations, allowing us to greatly enhance our understanding of Mars, for four years and 23 days.
• Salute, you noble robot.
• In the area of humans passing, sending my sincere RIP to Terry Hall of The Specials and Fun Boy Three, who died at age 63. His music brought an entire genre into the spotlight, and “Ghost Town” was one of my personal favorites from my early high school days.
• Convicted rapist Harvey Weinstein, currently serving a 23-year sentence for rape, was found guilty of more rape yesterday in a separate trial. Per the jury ruling yesterday, Weinstein was again convicted of rape as well as sexual penetration by foreign object and forcible oral copulation.
• Hopefully he spends the rest of his life in prison. He’s 70, so ideally that’s the case.
• I know I keep talking about dangerous holiday weather and travel conditions. Maybe that’s annoying to you. Good. I’d rather you be annoyed than freezing to death on the side of a road somewhere.
• Also, do me another favor: keep your seatbelt on in a plane. There were two instances of severe turbulence in the past few days that left people hospitalized. See, the seatbelt stops you from bouncing off the ceiling of the plane and getting all squished and fucked up. That’s how it works.
• From the Sports Desk… a little reminder that most of the games this weekend are being played on Saturday, with Sunday being Christmas of course. There are a few Christmas Day games, though: Packers at Dolphins, Broncos at Rams, and Bucs at Cardinals.
• Finally, in idiot news, Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene are fighting over Kevin McCarthy’s bid for Speaker of the House. They’re not physically fighting, unfortunately. Sporky would kill Bobo. There would be no real winner for the rest of us.
• Today in history… Richard I of England is captured and imprisoned by Leopold V of Austria on his way home to England after the Third Crusade (1192). The Louisiana Purchase is completed at a ceremony in New Orleans (1803). South Carolina becomes the first state to attempt to secede from the United States (1860). Japanese air forces bomb Calcutta, India (1942). The EBR-1 in Arco, ID becomes the first nuclear power plant to generate electricity by powering four light bulbs (1953). Cardiff is proclaimed the capital city of Wales, United Kingdom (1955). The United States invasion of Panama deposes Manuel Noriega (1989). Elizabeth II becomes the oldest monarch in the history of the United Kingdom, surpassing Queen Victoria, who lived for 81 years and 243 days (2007). The United States Space Force becomes the first new branch of the United States Armed Forces since 1947 (2019). 
• December 20 is the birthday of physician/diplomat Arthur Lee (1740), composer Pietro Raimondi (1786), businessman Harvey Samuel Firestone (1868), physicist Robert J. Van de Graaff (1901), actor John Hillerman (1932), drummer Peter Criss (1945), director/screenwriter Dick Wolf (1946), musician/producer Alan Parsons (1948), singer Anita Ward (1956), singer-songwriter Billy Bragg (1957), singer-songwriter Mike Watt (1957), NFL player Rich Gannon (1965), singer-songwriter Chris Robinson (1966), and actor Jonah Hill (1983).

Welp… no rest for the weird. I have multiple meetings this morning, and a grocery store run that also includes my Christmas feast fixings. So this day is going to be a) busy and b) expensive. But, as they say, Christmas comes but once per year, and might as well make the most of it. Enjoy your day.