Saturday, February 11, 2023

Random News: February 11, 2023



DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.



Good morning. It’s February 11, 2023, and it’s a Saturday. I just got up and made coffee, so let’s look into various things now that my brain is functioning to some degree…


  • We shot down a thing.
  • “We” being the United States, and the thing being… well, they’re being a little cagey about that. They say the thing (or “object”, as they so descriptively call it) was the size of a small car and was hanging out over Alaska at about 40,000 feet.
  • Using my supreme powers of reading between the lines, I’d say it was probably another balloon.
  • 40,000 feet is low enough to be a danger to commercial aircraft.
  • So we got some more target practice for our F-22 pilots.
  • The toll from Monday’s horrible earthquake that hit Turkey and Syria is over 25,000 now. Many tens of thousands more are seriously injured and/or homeless as a result of the 7.8 quake and huge aftershocks.
  • It’s horrible. It’s already well within the top 10 most deadly and devastating earthquake events of the 21st century.
  • In other news…
  • Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton has agreed to a $3.3 million settlement and an apology as part of a tentative settlement with four whistleblowers who publicly accused Paxton of abuse of office, bribery and other criminal offenses in 2020.
  • All four had been fired after reporting their allegations to the FBI.
  • Paxton remains under investigation by the FBI.
  • Get his ass.
  • The plan of Senator Rick Scott (F-FL) to "sunset" all federal legislation every five years — including Social Security — is not being received well by either Democrats or sane Republicans. Or even most asshole Republicans.
  • "I mean, it's just a bad idea. I think it will be a challenge for him to deal with this in his own reelection in Florida, a state with more elderly people than any state in America.” - Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell.
  • Regardless, I’d recommend to keep a close eye on the large Republican faction who is intent on taking away the Social Security benefits that help your parents survive, and that you pay into your whole life.
  • It’s your money.
  • Moving on.
  • Nevada Governor Joe Lombardo declared a state emergency last night after a leak was detected in a pipeline that supplies fuel to Las Vegas.
  • The leak is at a pumping station not very far from here in Long Beach, California.
  • Apparently the emergency declaration will allow Nevada to lift restrictions on trucking and other delivery methods to bring in fuel.
  • Lombardo urged residents not to panic buy so it does not create unnecessary shortages. But immediately after, Vegas residents began panic buying. Videos posted on social media showed cars lined up at local gas stations.
  • Fucking people.
  • And now, The Weather: “Macchina” by Los Vii
  • From the Sports Desk… yep, Super Bowl is tomorrow. I’m sure there are already pre-game shows on right now, over 24 hours before kickoff.
  • The halftime performance is by Rihanna. I am a bit embarrassed to say that I don’t know any of her music. If my life depended on being able to name one Rihanna song, I’d be a dead man.
  • However, Chris Martin of Coldplay said the following: “You have to be an idiot not to recognize that she’s the best singer of all time.”
  • The best singer of all time. Wow. I guessed I’ve missed out.
  • Here’s a fun fact: this week, Chiefs QB Patrick Mahomes was named this season’s NFL Most Valuable Player.
  • However, there’s currently a nine-game losing streak by league MVPs who play in the Super Bowl.
  • Interesting.
  • Another Super Bowl LVII note: it will make history when the traditional pregame military flyover will be piloted by an all-female team.
  • Two of the four female pilots who will orchestrate the diamond formation — a tribute to 50 years of women flying in the U.S. Navy.
  • Neat.
  • Today in history… Henry VIII of England is recognized as supreme head of the Church of England (1534). Sir Francis Drake with an English force captures and occupies the Spanish colonial port of Cartagena de Indias for two months, obtaining a ransom and booty (1586). Massachusetts governor Elbridge Gerry is accused of "gerrymandering" for the first time (1812). Giuseppe Verdi's opera ‘I Lombardi alla prima crociata’ receives its first performance in Milan, Italy (1843). The United States House of Representatives unanimously passes a resolution guaranteeing noninterference with slavery in any state (1861). The Flint sit-down strike ends when General Motors recognizes the United Auto Workers trade union (1937). The Iranian Revolution establishes an Islamic theocracy under the leadership of Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini (1979). Nelson Mandela is released from Victor Verster Prison outside Cape Town, South Africa after 27 years as a political prisoner (1990). Buster Douglas, a 42:1 underdog, knocks out Mike Tyson in ten rounds at Tokyo to win boxing's world Heavyweight title (1990). Pluto crosses Neptune's orbit and is not expected to interact with Neptune's orbit again until 2231 (1999). The first wave of the Egyptian revolution culminates in the resignation of Hosni Mubarak and the transfer of power to the Supreme Military Council after 17 days of protests (2011). The World Health Organization officially names the coronavirus outbreak as COVID-19, with the virus being designated SARS-CoV-2 (2020).
  • February 11 is the birthday of English queen Elizabeth of York (1466), SCOTUS chief justice Melville Fuller (1833), physicist Josiah Willard Gibbs (1839), engineer/businessman Thomas Edison (1847), boxer/actor Max Baer (1909), politician Lloyd Bentsen (1921), actor Leslie Nielsen (1926), actress Tina Louise (1934), politician Manuel Noriega (1934), singer/guitarist Gene Vincent (1935), actor Burt Reynolds (1936), songwriter Gerry Goffin (1939), pianist Sérgio Mendes (1941), politician Jeb Bush (1953), singer-songwriter Sheryl Crow (1962), politician Sarah Palin (1964), actress Jennifer Aniston (1969), conspiracy theorist Alex Jones (1974), musician Mike Shinoda (1977), singer-songwriter Brandy Norwood (1979), and singer Kelly Rowland (1981).


I’m heading to a mortuary in a little while. No one ever wants to be in a mortuary. I’m trying to think of any possible scenario that would involve someone happy to be going there. But part of being an adult human being is doing shit you’d prefer not doing. I’d prefer to be sitting here smoking weed while naked. Maybe that’s how I’d reward myself after I get back. Enjoy your day.

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