Random News: November 5, 2024

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s November 5, 2024, and it’s a Tuesday. What’s that? Oh, is something happening today? Ah yes. Yes. The day that will determine the direction of the world for generations to come. That day.

• Indeed, here we are.
• I feel pretty good.
• If you’re an American citizen 18 years of age or older and haven’t voted yet, please stop reading this now and make a plan to vote today. To that end…
• Just a couple of notes for voters today.
• I repeat, do NOT wear any kind of campaign swag to the polls. Not a shirt, a hat, a button. Nothing. At minimum, you will be told to remove the offending item. If you refuse, a series of worse things will happen quickly.
• If you’re in line, stay in line. Even if the polls close, they have to accept your vote if you’re in line before closing time.
• If you make a mistake on your ballot, you have the right to ask for a new one.
• If the machines are down at your polling place, you have the right to ask for a paper ballot.
• Note that any kind of intimidation at the polling place is a federal crime.
• If you run into any problems or have questions tomorrow on Election Day, call the Election Protection Hotline: 1-866-OUR-VOTE.
• Possible handy info: 28 states and the District of Columbia have laws requiring workers be given time off to vote, with most but not all stipulating that workers not take a financial hit.
• They are: Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Georgia, Illinois, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Maryland, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Missouri, Nebraska, Nevada, New Mexico, New York, Ohio, Oklahoma, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, West Virginia, Wisconsin, and Wyoming.
• In the remaining 22 states, you might not be able to leave work to do your patriotic duty. That’s just shitty. Hopefully you’ll have the chance during your break or after you get off work.
• Without a federal law, voting leave per above is based on state regulations. I am 100% in favor for making Election Day a national holiday. No one should have to be concerned keeping their job (or even taking an income hit) in order to vote.
• These nine states have strict requirements to have a valid photo ID when you vote…
• Arkansas, Georgia, Indiana, Kansas, Mississippi, North Carolina, Ohio, Tennessee, and Wisconsin.
• In another 14 states, you can only cast a provisional ballot without photo ID…
• Alabama, Arizona, Florida, Idaho, Louisiana, Michigan, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Texas, and Wyoming.
• No photo ID is required to vote in the other 28 states.
• While every single vote in every state is vitally important, the final results on Election Day will be most highly influenced by votes in seven states: Arizona, Georgia, Michigan, Nevada, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin.
• Let’s take a quick look at each of those.
• Arizona: polls open right now at 8am PT. Joe Biden carried this state in 2020 by 0.3%, only the second Democratic presidential candidate to do so in nearly 70 years. Polls will close at 9pm. Arizona does not release votes until all precincts have reported (or one hour after all polls are closed, whichever is first). If it’s a very close race, it could take Maricopa Country weeks to report. Let’s hope that’s not the case, or holds up the election if it is.
• Georgia: polls are open now, and have been since 7am ET. In 2020 Biden was the first Democrat in a White House race to carry the state since Bill Clinton in 1992. You may recall that he defeated Dump by 11,779 votes. Georgia’s polls close at 7pm. 
• Michigan: polls are also open now, and have been since 7am local time. Biden won it in 2020 after Dumpy took it in 2016. Polls in most of the state close at 8pm, with the rest at 9pm.
• Nevada: polls have been open for an hour since 7am PT. Fun fact: the candidate who won Nevada has gone on to win the White House in 27 of the past 30 presidential elections. Polls close at 7pm local time. 
• North Carolina: polls opened bright and early at 6:30am ET. Democrats have carried NC only two times in presidential elections since 1968. But Dump’s 2020 victory there was by about 1 percentage point, was his smallest winning margin in any state. Polls close at 7:30PM ET.
• Pennsylvania: polls have been open for hours, since 7am EST. Biden’s 2020 margin in Pennsylvania was about 80,000 votes out of more than 6.9 million votes. With 19 electoral votes, PA has the most of any of the battlegrounds. Polls close at 8pm ET.
• Wisconsin: polls are also open there since 7am CT. The margin of victory in the state was less than 1 percentage point in 2000, 2004, 2016, and 2020. Polls close at 8pm CT.
• Moving on.
• Let’s talk about when we may know the results of the election. Note that these estimates only happen if there’s a clear early winner, state by state. Anything involving very close races (with ballots to count and recount) negate ll info below.
• That being said…
• Tonight between 7pm-10pm ET (4pm-7pm PT): most results from GA & NC (unless it’s too close to call). Partial results from PA, WI, and MI. Near-complete results from VA, FL, OH, and CO.
• I mean, if Harris wins a number of those crucial states, we could be aware of our next president and still get to sleep at a reasonable hour. It’s a nice thought; pretty sure that won’t happen, but it would indeed be nice.
• Tonight between 10pm-midnight ET (7pm-9pm PT): most results from GA, NC, and potentially MI (unless too close to call). Partial results from PA, WI, and AZ. Initial results from NV.
• Tonight/tomorrow between midnight and 6am ET (9pm-3am PT): most results from WI & MI. Partial results from PA, AZ, & NV.
• Tomorrow: additional results from all states, particularly PA, AZ, NV, MI, & WI (unless, yes, too close to call).
• Thursday and beyond: more results trickling in from all states, particularly PA, NV, and AZ. In NV, ballots can continue to arrive through 11/9, and voters can cure ballots through 11/12. Note that in PA, thousands of provisional ballots are expected that will be counted starting 11/8; in NC there may be challenged ballots that are not counted until 11/15.
• And again, maybe it goes this way or maybe it’s super close and there end up being court challenges and it takes weeks.
• We. Do. Not. Know.
• But soon we will. Maybe tonight. Maybe next week. Maybe in December.
• But either way, we’re going to stay optimistic today. I gave you my electoral vote prediction yesterday and I’ll stand by it… Harris 298, Dump 240.
• Let’s see how close I am.
• A very important reminder: Dump will ABSOLUTELY declare victory. I’m surprised he hasn’t done so already at 7am PT.
• But do not listen to him or anyone else. As the saying goes, it win’t over ’til it’s over.
• Moving on.
• We’re collectively voting for a lot more than just the President. 
• Voters in nine states are deciding whether their state constitutions should guarantee a right to abortion, weighing ballot measures that are expected to spur turnout for a range of crucial races.
• Abortion was a right for all women in the USA until Donald J. Trump’s hand-picked Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade on his order.
• Passing certain amendments in Arizona, Florida, Missouri, Nebraska, and South Dakota likely would lead to undoing bans or restrictions that currently block varying levels of abortion access to more than 7 million women of childbearing age who live in those states.
• Keep in mind that the future legality and availability of abortion hinges not only on ballot measures, as policies could shift depending on who controls Congress and the presidency.
• But if you don’t vote, you can expect that the Republicans will continue to force women in the USA to give birth against their will.
• And that American women will continue to die from a lack of reproductive health care.
• And that Dump has sworn that Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. will be in charge of the health of women.
• Please vote. thank you.
• Moving on.
• Yesterday, El Dumpo spent a chunk of the day calling Republican members of Congress and threatening them if they acknowledge a Harris victory on election day, or announce the party needs to "move on" from him.
• My sincere hope is that in a matter of hours, Dump finds that he has no power, and that most of the Republicans at that point will be aware that moving on from him is that absolute best thing for themselves (which, of course, is what they care about the most).
• Not to mention the country and the people they serve.
• If things go well today, the only necessary reason I’ll have to make mention of him in the future is in regard to his pending trials and sentencing dates.
• And those crimes may be still in progress.
• Dump is mobilizing his Proud Boys once again. The decentralized all-male far-right group remains active around the country, and some of its members are openly making plans to get involved in today’s elections.
• They’ve been doing their usual thing… posting violent and threatening imagery. I wouldn’t at all be surprised to hear about a number of those dumbfucks getting their asses in serious trouble in certain states tomorrow.
• Hey Ohio. Just saying.
• This would be a good place to mention that when you see election workers tomorrow, be sure to thank them. It’s a tedious, stressful, and often thankless job, and it’s important.
• In somewhat related news…
• This morning, federal judges denied two states’ requests to bar the Justice Department from dispatching lawyers to monitor adherence to federal voting rights laws on Election Day.
• Both Missouri and Texas asked federal courts to keep DOJ lawyers away from their polls. Fucking pricks.
• Missouri’s attorney general and secretary of state said any monitoring would “displace state election authorities,” and Texas’s attorney general contended that “Texas law alone determines who can monitor voting in Texas.”
• This is America. 
• The DOJ has sent poll monitors to 27 states. This is normal. The agency regularly deploys its staff to monitor for compliance with federal civil rights laws in elections in communities all across the country.
• They should be welcomed.
• In one crucial city, the District Attorney was clear about what will happen to those who intend to disrupt their elections.
• Yesterday, Philadelphia DA Larry Krasner activated his office's Election Task Force with a warning to anyone who may plan to interfere with elections in the City of Brotherly Love…
• “F around and find out.”
• He actually said that, which made me laugh. He also said that the task force, which Krasner noted was operating on a non-partisan basis. “We do not care who gets your vote. We care that you get to vote," he promised.
• Let’s keep on keeping on.
• I was going to add a section here about what our plan is if Kamala Harris doesn’t win. It’s a distinct possibility, and I know most people like being prepared for all possible outcomes.
• But I’ve changed my mind. I’ll have plenty of time to go over those thoughts after today, if necessary.
• For today, I’m riding the blue wave, and I invite all of you to go along with me.
• A few other news tidbits…
• Lt. John Rodgers, a 20-year veteran sheriff's patrol commander in Clark County, Ohio, declared on Facebook that he would not help Democrats and would require proof of who a person voted for before providing them aid.
• He has since apologized and blamed his prescription sleep aids for causing his "out of character" actions. Rodgers will remain on duty but got a written reprimand for violating the department's social media policy.
• Elsewhere in Ohio, the U.S. Justice Department said its election monitoring efforts will include Portage County, where a sheriff was accused of intimidating voters last month.
• As I mentioned, Republican Sheriff Bruce Zuchowski posted on social media that people with Kamala Harris yard signs should have their addresses written down so that immigrants can be sent to live with them if the Democrat wins the presidency.
• Not acceptable. It’s examples like these that massively raises the public mistrust of law enforcement across the country.
• And now, The Weather: “Even” by Oca Pine
• From the Sports Desk… I CAN’T THINK ABOUT SPORTS RIGHT NOW, YOU FUCKS.
• Um… sorry, freaked out for a sec. On Monday Night Football, the Chiefs (8-0) beat the Bucs (4-5) 30-24 in overtime. There you go.
• Today in history… Guy Fawkes is arrested in the Gunpowder Plot (1605). French-American forces under Colonel LaBalme are defeated by Miami Chief Little Turtle (1780). Nat Turner, American slave leader, is tried, convicted, and sentenced to death in Virginia (1831). In defiance of the law, suffragist Susan B. Anthony votes for the first time, and is later fined $100 (1872). Woodrow Wilson is elected the 28th President of the United States, defeating incumbent William Howard Taft (1912). The Everett massacre takes place in Everett, WA as political differences lead to a shoot-out between the Industrial Workers of the World organizers and local police (1916). Franklin D. Roosevelt is the first and only President of the United States to be elected to a third term (1940). Richard Nixon is elected as 37th President of the United States (1968). Bill Clinton is reelected President of the United States (1996). The Astroworld Festival crowd crush results in 10 deaths and 25 people being hospitalized (2021).
• November 5 is the birthday of painter Anna Maria van Schurman (1607), socialist/politician Eugene V. Debs (1855), journalist Ida Tarbell (1857), writer/philosopher Will Durant (1885), astronomer Fred Lawrence Whipple (1906), singer/guitarist/actor Roy Rogers (1911), actress Vivien Leigh (1913), accordionist Myron Floren (1919), singer-songwriter/guitarist Ike Turner (1931), singer-songwriter/guitarist Art Garfunkel (1941), actor/playwright Sam Shepard (1943), musician Gram Parsons (1946), musician Peter Noone (1947), actor Armin Shimerman (1949), NBA player Bill Walton (1952), guitarist/songwriter Jeff Watson (1956), actor Robert Patrick (1958), singer-songwriter/guitarist Bryan Adams (1959), actress Tatum O’Neal (1963), actress Famke Janssen (1965), actor Sam Rockwell (1968), guitarist/songwriter Jonny Greenwood (1971), MLB player Johnny Damon (1973), singer-songwriter/guitarist Ryan Adams (1974), golfer Bubba Watson (1978), NBA player O. J. Mayo (1987), and NFL player Odell Beckham Jr. (1992).

I’ll leave you on this momentous day with these words. No matter what happens, we’re going to be okay. If we need to fight, we fight. But there will be no despair. As President Biden often reminds us, this is the UNITED States of America. One way or another — and it’s not always easy — we’ll stay united. Please vote for Kamala Harris and Democrats down your entire ballot, and make the world a better place in which to lie for everyone. Enjoy your day.