Saturday, March 2, 2024

Random News: March 2, 2024



DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.



Good morning. It’s March 2, 2024, and it’s a Saturday. I’m wearing a robe and enjoying coffee on a cloudy and occasionally drizzly day. Plenty of news to discuss as I lazily start this day.


  • First, with lots of people voting in primaries over the next week, I want to tell you about something in my state of California. It’s our Voter’s Bill of Rights, a list published by the state that clearly explains your rights as a voter.
  • I’m not sure if you have something similar in your state or not, though your should. Anyway, hopefully all of this is applicable to you wherever you live in the rest of the USA.
  • You have the following rights.
  • The right to vote if you are a registered voter. You are eligible to vote if you are: a U.S. citizen living in California, at least 18 years old, registered where you currently live, not currently serving a state or federal prison term for the conviction of a felony, and not currently found mentally incompetent to vote by a court.
  • The right to vote if you are a registered voter even if your name is not on the list. You will vote using a provisional ballot. Your vote will be counted if elections officials determine that you are eligible to vote. 
  • The right to vote if you are still in line when the polls close.
  • The right to cast a secret ballot without anyone bothering you or telling you how to vote.
  • The right to get a new ballot if you have made a mistake, if you have not already cast your ballot. You can ask an elections official at a polling place for a new ballot, or exchange your vote-by-mail ballot for a new one at an elections office, or at your polling place, or vote using a provisional ballot.
  • The right to get help casting your ballot from anyone you choose, except from your employer or union representative.
  • The right to drop off your completed vote-by-mail ballot at any polling place in California.
  • The right to get election materials in a language other than English if enough people in your voting precinct speak that language.
  • The right to ask questions to elections officials about election procedures and watch the election process. If the person you ask cannot answer your questions, they must send you to the right person for an answer. If you are disruptive, they can stop answering you.
  • The right to report any illegal or fraudulent election activity to an elections official or the Secretary of State’s office.
  • I mean, how clear and easily understandable is that? I will never stop being appreciative of my wonderful state. Again, you can probably look and see if your state has similar information.
  • Okay, let’s do the news, starting with something disconcerting.
  • Yesterday, a federal appeals court overturned a sentencing enhancement used against January 6 defendants charged with felony obstruction. It means that over 100 convicted rioters may have to be resentenced.
  • It’s not clear what benefit any of the Jan. 6 assholes will receive because of the ruling. It could have an impact in plea negotiations, eliminating one bargaining chip used by prosecutors when encouraging defendants to plead guilty without a trial.
  • But if the Supreme Court reverses or pares back the use of the obstruction charge, all of those cases would have to be reconsidered anew. The courts are still working their way through the latter half of 1,300 charged cases, three years after the failed coup attempt.
  • Side note: Obstruction of Congress is one of the four felony charges Donnie Dump faces in D.C. federal court; he is also accused of conspiring to commit that crime.
  • Okay, some better news about the Smelly Dump.
  • Under last month's fraud trial judgment, Donnie's debt to New York rises by $111,984 in interest per day. That means every nine days, he owes the state another $1,000,000.
  • As of today, his total fraud trial judgment, originally $454M, rose to $455M.
  • Ha ha.
  • Now some justice news.
  • Kevin Monahan, the guy who shot and killed a young woman who was a passenger in a car that mistakenly drove up his driveway last year, got sentenced to 25 years to life in prison yesterday.
  • The judge was accepting none of his shit. He said, “I think you really could possibly do the same thing again. It’s obvious to me that you feel justified. You don’t take any responsibility for the outcome of your actions. You just don’t get it.”
  • Fuck that guy. Hopefully he’ll never get out.
  • In other justice news, federal authorities have announced an investigation into allegations of bullying involving Nex Benedict, the non-binary teen who died after a fight with classmates in a women’s bathroom at their high school in Oklahoma.
  • The US Department of Education said yesterday it was investigating whether Owasso public schools, outside Tulsa, had “failed to appropriately respond to alleged harassment of students” – a violation of federal law.
  • They were responding to a complaint brought by Kelley Robinson, president of LGBTQ+ rights group Human Rights Campaign, who claimed the school district had notice of sex-based harassment at the high school, including instances of bullying, violence, and harassment, that it had failed to respond appropriately to, creating discrimination.
  • Good. Get their asses.
  • It’s been awhile since we checked on Florida. How are things going down there?
  • The University of Florida is terminating all its diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) positions to comply with a state law passed in January that prohibits state or federal funds from being used to fund the programs.
  • Ah.
  • They can’t even teach sociology there. In a fucking university system. The education board said that a “principles of sociology” course could no longer be taught and would be replaced with a general American history class.
  • Why would anyone want to hire a Florida graduate anymore, knowing they’re not receiving one of the most important aspects of a college education?
  • And now, The Weather: “Any Light” by Loving
  • Let’s do a chart. It’s March 1993. I graduated from college and am scrambling to get a job in a shaky economy. Here’s what I’d hear if I turned on a pop station while driving around LA in my shitty Toyota pickup (which I never did, since I was listening almost exclusively to grunge and alt-rock).
  • Some reasonably good stuff here mixed in with some utterly forgettable compete shit music.
  • 1. A Whole New World (Aladdin's Theme) (Peabo Bryson & Regina Belle). 2. I Will Always Love You (Whitney Houston). 3. Ordinary World (Duran Duran). 4. Informer (Snow). 5. Nuthin' But A "G" Thang (Dr. Dre). 6. I'm Every Woman (From "The Bodyguard") (Whitney Houston). 7. Mr. Wendal (Arrested Development). 8. Hip Hop Hooray (Naughty By Nature). 9. Don't Walk Away (Jade). 10. Bed Of Roses (Bon Jovi). 11. 7 (Prince And The New Power Generation). 12. Here We Go Again! (Portrait). 13. Saving Forever For You (From "Beverly Hills, 90210") (Shanice). 14. Get Away (Bobby Brown). 15. Rebirth Of Slick (Cool Like Dat) (Digable Planets). 16. I Got A Man (Positive K). 17. Comforter (Shai). 18. That's What Love Can Do (Boy Krazy). 19. If I Ever Fall In Love (Shai). 20. Two Princes (Spin Doctors).
  • From the Sports Desk… rest in peace to legendary Pittsburgh Steelers outside linebacker Andy Russell, a two-time Super Bowl champion, who died yesterday at 82.
  • He was a seven-time Pro Bowl selection while part of the famous Steel Curtain defense as part of a star-studded trio of linebackers featuring Jack Lambert in the middle and Jack Ham on the other side.
  • Today in history… Vasco da Gama's fleet visits the Island of Mozambique (1498). The Bank of England issues the first one-pound and two-pound banknotes (1797). The U.S. Congress passes the Act Prohibiting Importation of Slaves, disallowing the importation of new slaves into the country (1807). The Declaration of independence of the Republic of Texas from Mexico is adopted (1836). The two-day Great Slave Auction, the largest such auction in United States history, begins (1859). The U.S. Congress passes the first Reconstruction Act (1867). Just two days before inauguration, the U.S. Congress declares Rutherford B. Hayes the winner of the 1876 U.S. presidential election even though Samuel J. Tilden had won the popular vote (1877). United States Steel Corporation is founded as a result of a merger between Carnegie Steel Company and Federal Steel Company which became the first corporation in the world with a market capital over $1 billion (1901). Allied aircraft defeat a Japanese attempt to ship troops to New Guinea (1943). Wilt Chamberlain sets the single-game scoring record in the National Basketball Association by scoring 100 points (1962). The Pioneer 10 space probe is launched from Cape Canaveral, Florida with a mission to explore the outer planets (1972). Previously been available only in Japan, Compact discs and players are released for the first time in the United States and other markets (1983). Armenia, Azerbaijan, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Moldova, San Marino, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan join the United Nations (1992). The elements Moscovium, Tennessine, and Oganesson are officially added to the periodic table at a conference in Moscow, Russia (2017).
  • March 2 is the birthday of Scotland king Robert II (1316), politician DeWitt Clinton (1769), soldier/politician Sam Houston (1793), brewer/philanthropist Carl Jacobsen (1842), pianist/composer Kurt Weill (1900), writer/illustrator Dr. Seuss (1904), actor/singer/producer Desi Arnaz (1917), actress Jennifer Jones (1919), author/journalist Tom Wolfe (1930), Soviet leader Mikhail Gorbachev (1931), novelist John Irving (1942), singer-songwriter Lou Reed (1942), author Peter Straub (1943), guitarist Larry Carlton (1948), singer Karen Carpenter (1950), actress Laraine Newman (1952), singer-songwriter Dale Bozzio (1955), singer-songwriter Jon Bon Jovi (1962), actor Daniel Craig (1968), rapper/actor Method Man (1971), singer-songwriter Chris Martin (1977), NFL player Sebastian Janikowski (1978), actress Rebel Wilson (1980), NFL player Reggie Bush (1985), and NFL player Tua Tagovailoa (1998).


That seems like enough news for now. Do fun things. Enjoy your day.

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