Random News: March 7, 2024

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s March 7, 2024, and it’s a Thursday for some reason. Feeling pretty good thus far today, since I’m up and showered and dressed and caffeinated. Might as well see what’s happening around the world. Hopefully something good. Let’s find out.

• Tonight, President Joe Biden will deliver his State of the Union speech. What is the State of the Union speech and way does it happen?
• Fun fact: it’s not optional. The address fulfills the requirement in Article II, Section 3, Clause 1 of the U.S. Constitution for the president to periodically "give to the Congress Information of the State of the Union, and recommend to their Consideration such Measures as he shall judge necessary and expedient."
• For the first hundred of so years or the USA, this was a written report that the President committed to Congress. 
• After 1913, Woodrow Wilson, the 28th U.S. president, began the regular practice of delivering the address to Congress in person as a way to rally support for the president's agenda, while also submitting a more detailed report. With the advent of radio and television, the address is now broadcast live in all United States time zones on many networks.
• The annual gathering puts leaders from both parties and all three branches of government on display in the same room. It's an illustration of how the system is supposed to work.
• President Biden faces at least two big tasks in tonight’s State of the Union speech: to offer an agenda for the rest of his term, and to show voters he is ready for another one.
• Biden is pressing lawmakers to pass spending bills, approve funding for Ukraine, and address a crisis at the border. All these measures are stuck in the Republican-led House of Representatives.
• I’ll be watching. You should too.
• Moving on.
• Yesterday, the Supreme Court scheduled a date of April 25 to review El Dumpo’s claim that he is immune from criminal prosecution on charges of trying to overturn the results of the 2020 election.
• Interesting that they scheduled it for the very last day of the court’s argument calendar.
• Dumpy’s election obstruction trial was originally scheduled to begin this week until the Supreme Court stepped in to say they’d hear arguments in this absolutely ludicrous case, which, I should add, is titled “Trump v. United States of America.”
• That’s appropriate. No one tries to fuck the USA harder than Donnie Boy.
• If the case is delayed more and more, and Dumpy is re-elected, he will simply order the Justice Department to drop the federal charges against him. In addition, it is Justice Department policy not to prosecute a sitting president.
• Donnie’s claim is that US presidents are completely immune from criminal prosecution, as has been the historical case of kings and malevolent dictators. It is the exact opposite of what the founding fathers of this country specifically designated when the USA was created.
• Guess we’ll see how it goes. Also, if the Court agrees with Dump, there’s no legal reason at all that the current president couldn’t just have Dump killed before the election with no fear of prosecution.
• I’m serious.
• Let’s move on.
• After getting his ass handed to him in 2024 presidential primaries across the country, Rep. Dean Phillips (D-MN) has exited the Democratic field.
• "Clearly and convincingly, Democratic primary voters have opined that I'm not that guy," Phillips said. He’s right.
• Phillips also said he is endorsing Biden. Good.
• Contrastingly — and disappointingly, I should add — progressive left Democrat Katie Porter, who’d been running for the open US Senate seat in California, went on social media after she lost badly to centrist Dem Adam Schiff, saying the election was “rigged”.
• We don’t need Democrats to echo things that Donald Trump says.
• Porter tried to clarify later, saying, "'Rigged' means manipulated by dishonest means… At no time have I ever undermined the vote count and election process in CA, which are beyond reproach."
• Then don’t say what you don’t mean. Getting outspent in a campaign is part of life. It doesn’t mean the election itself was unfair.
• Her approach to not conceding gracefully is going to cost her future political career, which is a shame. Bad choice, Katie.
• I want to back up to the vote margins from Super Tuesday once again. There’s an important point you should recognize.
• Here are what percentage of people voted for Nikki Haley in various states. Will some of these vote for Dump in the general election in November? Yes, of course… but not all of them. And these numbers are way higher than any of the pundits predicted.
• Colorado: 33.4%. Maine: 26.2%. Michigan: 26.6%. Minnesota: 29.1%. North Carolina: 23.4%. New Hampshire: 43.2%. Nevada: 30.4%. Utah: 32.8%. Virginia: 34.8%.
• That is significant, and will absolutely impact the election. Remember, Dump needs even more support than he got in 2020 when he lost to Biden.
• And this time, Dump is in the race as the self-proclaimed man who singlehandedly killed Roe v. Wade, removing the rights of women’s reproductive freedom for millions across the country.
• This week, France — reacting directly to the step backwards in women’s rights in the USA — became the world’s first country to enshrine abortion rights in its constitution on Monday.
• Lawmakers from both houses of the French Parliament voted 780 to 72 in favor of the measure, easily clearing the three-fifths majority needed to amend the French constitution.
• The move was hailed in the country as a history-making way for France to send a clear signal of support on reproductive rights, with abortion under threat in the United States, as well as in parts of Europe, like Hungary, where far-right parties have come to power.
• Following the vote, the Eiffel Tower was lit up with the words “my body my choice.”
• If you re-elect Joe Biden, he has stated that a primary goal of his second term would be to enact legislation that codified the rights of women to reproductive freedom across the entire country.
• His opponent Donnie Dump says he’ll make abortion illegal in almost all circumstances in every state. Take your pick, folks.
• I should also note that voter turnout in many areas was fucking pathetic. I live in the country’s most populous county of all… Los Angeles County. We have about 5.7 million registered voters here.
• But less than a million voted in LA County on Super Tuesday. C’mon people. What the fuck? We make it SO easy to vote here. There are thousands of people who literally gave their lives so that you can vote, and then you did what on Tuesday? Watched Netflix? Jacked off and ate Cheetos?
• This fall, step the fuck up.
• Let’s do some Fuck Around, Find Out news.
• The private Christian school Liberty University has agreed to pay a record $14 million fine after the Education Department found a systemic and persistent failure by the institution to comply with a federal law on campus safety.
• Liberty did not notify people on campus about emergencies and dangerous situations such as bomb threats, the attempted abduction of a young girl, and people accused of repeated acts of sexual violence.
• In addition to the fine, they must spend $2 million on campus safety improvements during a two-year post-review monitoring period.
• Good. Fuck them.
• In other accountability news, Hannah Gutierrez Reed, the armorer on the “Rust” film, was found guilty yesterday of involuntary manslaughter.
• Her trial stemmed from the 2021 on-set fatal shooting of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins, who was killed by a live round of ammunition fired from a prop gun that was held by actor Alec Baldwin.
• I have to say… that’s her literal job, ensuring firearm safety on set. The involuntary manslaughter charge carries up to 18 months in prison and a $5,000 fine. The judge did not set a sentencing date.
• Let’s move on to that Christian fast food establishment Chick-fil-A. The owner of one such restaurant in Ohio, 49-year-old Stacy Lee Austin, drove 400 miles to North Carolina to have sex with a 15-year-old.
• He’d met the child on a social media app. Investigators said they found Austin’s underwear in the trashcan of a bathroom in the home along with some of the juvenile’s clothing. Deputies said Austin admitted to the sexual acts, but his main concern was losing his job with Chick-fil-A.
• He is being charged with statutory sex offense with a child and placed in the Rowan County Detention Center under no bond due to the Pretrial Integrity Act.
• Sigh.
• And now, The Weather: “Brown Paper Bag” by DIIV
• From the Sports Desk… here’s who’s leading the NBA right now.
• Eastern Conference… Celtics (48-13), Bucks (41-22), Cavaliers (40-22), Magic (37-26), Knicks (36-26), Heat (35-26).
• Western Conference… Timberwolves (43-19), Thunder (43-19), Nuggets (42-20), Clippers (40-21), Pelicans (37-25), Suns (36-26).
• Today in history… Napoleon Bonaparte captures Jaffa in Palestine and his troops proceed to kill more than 2,000 Albanian captives (1799). Senator Daniel Webster gives his "Seventh of March" speech endorsing the Compromise of 1850 in order to prevent a possible civil war (1850). Alexander Graham Bell is granted a patent for an invention he calls the “telephone" (1876). A group of 600 civil rights marchers is brutally attacked by state and local police in Selma, AL (1965). 
• March 7 is the birthday of mathematician/astronomer John Herschel (1792), artist Piet Mondrian (1872), actress Madame Sul-Te-Wan (1873), composer Maurice Ravel (1875), philanthropist/activist Dorothy de Rothschild (1895), race car driver Janet Guthrie (1938), actor Daniel J. Travanti (1940), businessman Michael Eisner (1942), singer-songwriter Townes Van Zandt (1944), singer-songwriter Arthur Lee (1945), actor John Heard (1946), singer-songwriter Peter Wolf (1946), NFL player Franco Harris (1950), actor Bryan Cranston (1956), tennis player Ivan Lendl (1960), singer-songwriter Taylor Dayne (1962), comedian Wanda Sykes (1964), NFL player Steve Beuerlein (1965), actress Rachel Weisz (1970), actress Jenna Fischer (1974), actress Laura Prepon (1980), and poet Amanda Gorman (1998).

That’s plenty of news. I have a normal day planned, but you know what they say about the best laid plans of mice and men. A normal day would be nice, regardless. Enjoy your day.