Random News: September 15, 2024

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s September 15, 2024, and it’s a Sunday. I really need to get in the shower after sweating through a live show last night and still feeling sticky and gross. However, as the dedicated newsman that I am, I will get these bullets together first. You’re welcome.

• While there remain some seven (or possibly more) swing states at play, it seems that the 2024 presidential election intersects in one place: Pennsylvania.
• Democrats have spent the last year eyeing a familiar trio of northern states that would deliver the White House in November: Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania are the “clearest pathway” to victory — as long as she also picks up a single electoral vote in the Omaha area.
• Dumpy’s team is also focused there, in a slightly different way. “As long as we hold North Carolina, we just need to win Georgia and Pennsylvania,” a campaign official told reporters last month.
• John Ashbrook, a Republican strategist, says, “Pennsylvania and Georgia have taken center stage for the final act of this election. The map becomes nearly impossible for Republicans without Georgia, and it becomes nearly impossible for Democrats without Pennsylvania.”
• That seems accurate to me.
• The optimist in me says that Harris — due to issues like women’s reproductive rights — will pick up more votes in more places than is being anticipated. But the flip side of that is the realistic acknowledgement that there are enough sexists and racists in the USA that a Black woman is fighting a huge uphill battle regardless of all other considerations.
• I’m going to tell you the same thing the Harris campaign is telling me, which is that every moment from now through November 5, you should consider Kamala the underdog in this fight.
• Act accordingly. Let’s move on.
• I was quite willing to move past what I considered to be ridiculous bullshit that Donald Trump and JD Vance were saying about the Haitian community in Ohio.
• I’m referring to the 100% false claims that they are eating people’s pet dogs and cats. I’ll once again note that this never happened, not even once.
• Everyone from the city manager and mayor of Springfield, OH to its police force to the residents to the state’s governor to the lady who initially shared the rumor — many of them Republicans — have decried it as being false.
• But even this morning on the Sunday news hows, Vance is continuing to push the lie. Vance and Trump both know they aren’t true, but push the dangerous misinformation anyway.
• And guess what? Now these poor residents of Springfield are paying a huge price. Windows being mashed. Acid poured on cars. Nazi rallies in their town, threatening them directly.
• Little kids in elementary schools are unable to get an education due to bomb threats by crazed MAGA terrorists. Schools there have been closed since Wednesday. the MAGAs have also issued bomb threats to city facilities and hospitals.
• And keep in mind… Vance is a Senator from Ohio. It’s people in his own state that he’s endangering through his fear mongering. And he’s still actively pushing the lies.
• I think it’s a clear sign that if Dump is elected, he and Vance will do the same thing on a national scale.
• And I’ll repeat for the dumbfucks who haven’t heard yet: these are not “illegal” immigrants. These are hard working people who are in the USA with permits and work visas.
• Dump threatened to deport them. He might as well threaten to deport you. They are in the USA legally.
• And that brings us to the point of this massive blunder: Dump and Vance have ratfucked their own campaign in the process.
• Dump had intended to spend this past week attacking Kamala Harris’ political vulnerabilities.
• Instead, his press coverage was 100% focused on the provably false claim about migrants eating dogs and cats, and defending the presence of his new girlfriend, far-right agitator Laura Loomer, on the campaign trail.
• The Loomer rumors are getting more and more nuts.
• Let’s start with the obvious. How does JD Vance go home at night to his Indian-American wife Usha while his boss’s girlfriend is making statements about the White House “smelling like curry” if Harris is elected?
• But as long as Dump and Vance are endangering thousands of people due to outright lies, I feel fine about spreading the unsubstantiated rumors that Dump has been telling people Loomer gives him the best oral sex he’s had in his life, and that Loomer has recordings of herself and Dump in their sexual trysts.
• Here’s something that’s not a rumor, though.
• Dump woke up this morning and decided the most presidential thing he could do was to make a social post that says, in all caps, “I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT!”
• Is that the guy you want to run the country? Can you imagine a real leader like Kamala Harris writing, “I HATE KID ROCK!” in a social post? No? Why not?
• Okay. Enough. Let’s talk about something actually important: making sure you’re registered to vote.
• Even if you voted in a previous election, you’re not necessarily registered for this one, and the window to register closes early next month in some states.
• Why not? States periodically purge their voter rolls of people who haven’t voted recently or have died, moved, or become ineligible by, say, being convicted of a felony. And sometimes eligible voters are mistakenly removed.
• Or they’re removed because the powers that be don’t want them voting. Traditionally, the more people who vote, the more likely a Democratic candidate gets elected. So Republicans are almost always the driving force to limit the voice of the people.
• Are you eligible to vote? Almost certainly yes. Nearly all U.S. citizens who live in the 50 states and the District of Columbia, and who will be age 18 or older on Election Day, are eligible to vote in state and federal elections.
• The exceptions: some states do not allow incarcerated people or people who have been convicted of felonies to vote.
• There are also state laws in some places that may also limit voting by people who have mental disabilities if very specific conditions are met.
• You may not be aware that people who live in U.S. territories, such as Puerto Rico or Guam, have nonvoting members of Congress and no representation in the electoral college, so they do not vote in the U.S. presidential election.
• Even states that allow registration all the way up to Election Day may not be able to process your registration if you wait that long. The way to avoid this is to check right now, right this moment, which only takes 30 seconds at vote.org.
• Here’s the list of voter registration deadlines for each state.
• Alabama: Oct. 21; Alaska: Oct. 6; Arizona: Oct. 7; Arkansas: Oct. 7; California: Nov. 5; Colorado: Nov. 5; Connecticut: Nov. 5; Delaware: Oct. 12; District of Columbia: Nov. 5; Florida: Oct. 7; Georgia: Oct. 7; Hawaii: Nov. 5; Idaho: Nov. 5; Illinois: Nov. 5; Indiana: Oct. 7; Iowa: Nov. 5; Kansas: Oct. 15; Kentucky: Oct. 7; Louisiana: Oct. 15; Maine: Nov. 5; Maryland: Nov. 5; Massachusetts: Oct. 26; Michigan: Nov. 5; Minnesota: Nov. 5; Mississippi: Oct. 7; Missouri: Oct. 9; Montana: Nov. 5; Nebraska: Oct. 25; Nevada: Nov. 5; New Hampshire: Nov. 5; New Jersey: Oct. 15; New Mexico: Nov. 5; New York: Oct. 26; North Carolina: Nov. 2; North Dakota: Registration not required; Ohio: Oct. 7; Oklahoma: Oct. 11; Oregon: Oct. 15; Pennsylvania: Oct. 21; Rhode Island: Nov. 5; South Carolina: Oct. 7; South Dakota: Oct. 21; Tennessee: Oct. 7; Texas: Oct. 7; Utah: Nov. 5; Vermont: Nov. 5; Virginia: Nov. 5; Washington: Nov. 5; West Virginia: Oct. 15; Wisconsin: Nov. 5; Wyoming: Nov. 5.
• Moving on.
• This morning on “Meet the Press,” Sen. JD Vance (R-OH), the GOP vice-presidential nominee, refused to to say whether Dumples the Clown, if elected, would veto a federal abortion ban.
• When asked directly, Vance replied, “I think that I’ve learned my lesson on speaking for the president before he and I have actually talked about an issue.”
• I would consider that to mean that Dump would 100% not veto a national abortion ban. I’ve said it many times: part of the Dump plan for his presidency would be to force all women across the country to give birth under all circumstances.
• Keep in mind that the Orange Goblin is still, to this day, sending out missives to congratulate himself on the overturn of Roe v. Wade, stating that everyone wanted it gone and he made it happen.
• Everyone. So he’s speaking for you there. Is that true?
• Let’s move on to some international news.
• Venezuelan authorities said they had arrested six foreigners, including a US Navy SEAL, claiming an alleged plot to kill Venezuela’s leader Nicolás Maduro.
• I mean… it sounds like some type of shit the CIA would do. Nevertheless, the US State Department has rejected claims of our involvement in the plot.
• You’re probably aware that the recent election in that country was condemned by Venezuela’s opposition, multiple Latin American leaders, and by the United States, who refuse to recognize Maduro’s disputed win, which has been followed by deadly protests during which thousands were arrested.
• The purported Navy SEAL arrested there was named as Wilbert Castañeda, and Venezuela claimed he was the leader of the operation. They also named two other detained Americans: David Estrella and Aaron Barrett Logan.
• In addition to the Americans, two Spanish citizens – José María Basoa Valdovinos and Andrés Martínez Adasme – and one Czech citizen, Jan Darmovzal, were arrested. Venezuelan authorities have also seized 400 US rifles linked to the alleged plot.
• That whole thing is gonna be ugly.
• Moving on.
• We don’t rely on polls here at Zak’s Random News. We try not to even mention them. I don’t trust them (in either direction) and they’ve let us down badly in the past.
• I only mention this today because it speaks to something I’ve been hypothesizing for a long time: that Dump may very well be even less popular than was though possible in “safe” red states.
• Kamala Harris is closing the gap with Dumpy in a state that may shock you: Iowa.
• New polling showing her down by just 4 points in the red-leaning state, at 43% to Dump’s 47%.
• Dump crushed Hillary Clinton in Iowa in 2016 by nearly 10 points. Just this past June, polls had Joe Biden trailing Dumpy by a whopping 18 points.
• And yet today, he’s barely hanging on to a 4-point lead to Harris. In Iowa.
• Give that some thought.
• I have a dream: the nation unites against hatred and division on November 5, and Harris not only wins states like Arizona, Georgia, Pennsylvania, and Michigan, but also Ohio, North Carolina, Missouri, Alaska, Texas, Florida… and yes, Iowa.
• It can happen if you vote.
• And now, The Weather: “Crystals (feat. Benjamin Gibbard)” by Sea Lemon
• Let’s do a chart.
• It’s mid-September 1994, 30 years ago today. I was a 25-year-old marketing assistant at an audio company, figuring shit out. 
• At the same time, Kamala Harris, at age 29, had been working as a deputy district attorney in Alameda County, CA, and had just been appointed to California’s state Unemployment Insurance Appeals Board.
• What was Tim Walz doing? He’d been teaching school in Alliance, NE. While working there he met his wife, Gwen Whipple, a fellow teacher, and in 1994 the two married.
• 1. II (Boyz II Men). 2. The Lion King (Soundtrack). 3. Forrest Gump (Soundtrack). 4. The 3 Tenors In Concert 1994 (Carreras, Domingo, Pavarotti). 5. Dookie (Green Day). 6. Purple (Stone Temple Pilots). 7. The Sign (Ace Of Base). 8. Candlebox (Candlebox). 9. August And Everything After (Counting Crows). 10. Regulate...G Funk Era (Warren G). 11. Smash (The Offspring). 12. Superunknown (Soundgarden). 13. Not A Moment Too Soon (Tim McGraw). 14. House Of Love (Amy Grant). 15. Tuesday Night Music Club (Sheryl Crow). 16. Voodoo Lounge (The Rolling Stones). 17. The Jerky Boys 2 (The Jerky Boys). 18. Live At The Acropolis (Yanni). 19. Yes I Am (Melissa Etheridge). 20. Natural Born Killers (Soundtrack).
• From the Sports Desk… we’re in week 2 of the 2024-25 NFL season. I’d say after this week, we’ll actually see some patterns emerging.
• Meanwhile, today slew of games includes New Orleans at Dallas (-6), Tampa Bay at Detroit (-7.5), Indianapolis (-3) at Green Bay, New York Jets (-3.5) at Tennessee, San Francisco (-4.5)  at Minnesota, Seattle (-3) at New England, New York Giants at Washington (-1.5), Los Angeles Chargers (-5) at Carolina, Cleveland at Jacksonville (-3), Las Vegas at Baltimore (-8.5), Los Angeles Rams at Arizona (EVEN), Pittsburgh (-2.5) at Denver, Cincinnati at Kansas City (-6), and Chicago at Houston (-6.5).
• Monday night’s game will have Atlanta at Philadelphia (-6).
• What are those little numbers in parenthesis? That’s the betting line. So if it says “Los Angeles Chargers (-5) at Carolina,” that means the Chargers — considered the better team — would have to beat the Panthers by at least five points to win a bet.
• Now you know.
• Today in history… King Philip II of Spain sends an "Invincible Armada” to overthrow Queen Elizabeth I of England and gets crushed in the English Channel (1588). The United States "Department of Foreign Affairs” is renamed the Department of State (1789). Napoleon reaches the Kremlin in Moscow (1812). The Liverpool to Manchester railway line opens (1830). HMS Beagle, with Charles Darwin aboard, reaches the Galápagos Islands (1835). Japan defeats Qing dynasty China in the Battle of Pyongyang (1894). Tanks are used for the first time in battle, at the Battle of the Somme in WWI (1916). Nazi Germany adopts a new national flag bearing the swastika (1935). Marilyn Monroe's iconic skirt scene is shot during filming for ‘The Seven Year Itch’ (1954). U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson, responding to a sniper attack at the University of Texas at Austin, writes a letter to Congress urging the enactment of gun control legislation (1967). Muhammad Ali outpoints Leon Spinks in a rematch to become the first boxer to win the world heavyweight title three times (1978). The Senate Judiciary Committee unanimously approves Sandra Day O'Connor to become the first female justice of the Supreme Court of the United States (1981). The Summer Olympics are opened in Sydney, Australia (2000). Lehman Brothers files for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, the largest bankruptcy filing in U.S. history (2008).
• September 15 is the birthday of explorer Marco Polo (1254), dentist/educator/inventor George Franklin Grant (1846), politician William Howard Taft (1857), car designer/businessman Ettore Bugatti (1881), writer Agatha Christie (1890), singer-songwriter/fiddle player Roy Acuff (1903), actress Fay Wray (1907), criminal and US attorney general John N. Mitchell (1913), comedian Nipsey Russell (1918), saxophonist/bandleader Cannonball Adderley (1928), MLB player Gaylord Perry (1938), NFL player/actor Merlin Olsen (1940), actor Tommy Lee Jones (1946), film director/producer Oliver Stone (1946), NFL coach Pete Carroll (1951), NFL player Dan Marino (1961), comedian/actor Jimmy Carr (1972), actor Tom Hardy (1977), Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex (1984), NBA player Dennis Schröder (1993).

Alright. I’m gonna shower this goo off my body and put on clothes and stuff. Also, a little later, I’ll post something about my show I was supposed to do last night (and didn’t), the show I hadn’t planned to do (and did), and by request, some info on my audio and video streaming and broadcast setup. Enjoy your day.