Random News: July 31, 2025

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s July 31, 2025, and it’s a Thursday for some reason. I’d previously been under the impression that my flight today left slightly earlier than it actually is, and that extra bit of time has allowed me to give you more news than I assumed I’d be able to. Of course, a few seconds after I post this, I’ll be scrambling around and shoving the rest of my stuff into a bag and heading off to LAX.

• A recent poll says that between 80-90% of all Republicans and Democrats across every spectrum of MAGA/conservatives and progressive/liberals want the Epstein files to be released to the public.
• And I want you to consider this: if those files purely implicated people like Bill Clinton (or Joe Biden or Hillary Clinton or Kamala Harris or Barack Obama or anyone else Dumpy considers an enemy), how quickly would he have released them?
• He’d have done it the second he got his tiny orange hands on them. You know how he is.
• So that tells me that he, himself, is all over those files. He was the one who was a close friend of Epstein. Dump has openly spoken about his age limit of girls he likes to fuck (the cut-off line is 12, he claims).
• What, you don’t believe me? In 2006, Dump was a guest on Howard Stern’s radio show. Here’s a transcript…
• STERN: “Do you think you could now be banging 24-year-olds?”
• DUMP: “Oh, absolutely I have no trouble.”
• STERN: “Would you do it?”
• DUMP: “I have no problem.”
• QUIVERS (co-host): “Do you have an age limit or would you…”
• DUMP: “If I- No, no, I have no age–. I mean, I have an age li… I don’t want to be like Congressman Foley, with, you know, 12-year-olds.”
• So there you go. 13-year-olds are fine, but no girls younger than that. Dump was 60 years old at the time of the interview. Keep that in mind when you talk to your daughters or granddaughters, especially if you’re a Dump supporter.
• And don’t forget about the anonymous woman using the pseudonym Katie Johnson. She filed a lawsuit in California accusing both Dump and Epstein of forcibly raping her when she was 13 years old at underage sex parties at Epstein's Manhattan residence in 1994.
• None of this is new for Dumpy. Since the 1970s, at least 25 women have publicly accused Dump of rape, kissing and groping without consent; looking under women's skirts; and walking in on naked teenage pageant contestants.
• One other piece of Epstein-related news for now.
• Yesterday, Senate Democrats started an attempt to to force the Justice Department to release the Epstein files using a little-known law that directs executive agencies to turn over information to congressional oversight committees.
• Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer announced they’d pursue the "full and complete Epstein files” via a federal law known as Section 2954.
• It allows five members on the Senate Committee on Homeland Security and Government Affairs to submit an information request on matters within its jurisdiction to a federal agency. 
• Enacted in 1928, the obscure law is part of Congress' ability to wield influence over executive branch agencies, and gives minority members of the oversight committees the ability to request information without the help of the committee chairman.
• Nice!
• Moving on for now.
• Yesterday, Republican Sen. Josh Hawley (R-MO) joined Democrats to advance legislation that would ban members of Congress from buying, selling, or owning individual stocks. 
• I mean, hell fucking yes. But you know this will never pass a floor vote. It’ll probably never even get a floor vote.
• In yesterday’s 8-7 vote, Hawley and Senate Democrats on the U.S. Senate Committee on Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs voted the legislation out of committee, with all other Republicans on the committee voting against it.
• Here’s the comedy part of this. Ready?
• A reporter asked Dumpy his feelings on Hawley’s bill. He responded, "Well, I like it conceptually. I don't know about it. But I like it conceptually."
• And then someone explained to Dump what the bill meant. And later that very day…
• "The Democrats, because of our tremendous ACHIEVEMENTS and SUCCESS, have been trying to 'Target' me for a long period of time, and they're using Josh Hawley, who I got elected TWICE, as a pawn to help them. I wonder why Hawley would pass a Bill that Nancy Pelosi is in absolute love with — He is playing right into the dirty hands of the Democrats. It's a great Bill for her, and her 'husband,' but so bad for our Country!"
• HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH…. Jesus fucking Christ.
• Moving on.
• Yesterday, Dumpy did do at least one thing to fuck up the USA (I’m sure there were others). He signed an executive order suspending what's known as a de minimis exemption, allowing low-value parcels that are shipped to the United States to avoid tariffs. 
• The exemption had applied to parcels valued at $800 or less, and allowed overseas retailers to ship inexpensive goods to consumers in the U.S. tax-free. 
• No more. You’re going to pay a lot more for individual items from everywhere outside the USA. The de minimis exemption will end on August 29.
• The suspension was already in place for China, and had a serious impact on major Chinese retailers like Shein and Temu.
• Now, you’re going to pay this new Trump Tax in one of two ways: "Ad valorem duty” (a tax equal to the effective tariff rate that Dump has imposed) or "specific duty” (which ranges from $80 per item to $200 per item).
• Even if someone sends you a gift from outside the USA, if it’s over $100 value, you’ll need to pay the Trump Tax.
• It was in the midst of the Great Depression that the de minimis provision was added to the Tariff Act of 1930. They had to because otherwise, no American could afford to buy anything overseas. Tariffs — I should add — were one of the big causes of the Great Depression.
• Let’s move on.
• Everything gets hacked. Just… I mean everything. If you have anything on the Internet, t’s already been hacked.
• The most recent example? A previously disclosed hack affecting Tea, a women-only dating advice app, was more extensive than previously thought. 
• Tea's investigation of the incident found that app users' direct messages had been breached, along with some of their photos. They took the whole system offline.
• The app, which has become one of Apple's most downloaded free apps, was compromised in a cyberattack that exposed members' personal information, including selfies. The hackers accessed a data storage system containing information that members had uploaded prior to February 2024. 
• An additional 59,000 images and direct messages were also accessed without authorization.
• Sigh. This is why we can’t have nice things.
• A note from the Entertainment Desk, just because I found it amusing.
• As you recall, a couple months back, the Foo Fighters released drummer Josh Freese from the band. Josh has played with dozens and dozens of bands as a touring and recording musician.
• For example, from 2005-2008, he was the drummer for Nine Inch Nails.
• Well, the Foo Fighters have announced their new stick man. He’s a very good drummer (as you’d expect) named Ilan Rubin. Where did they get Ilan? Well, he had replaced Josh Freese in Nine Inch Nails in 2009, and has been their drummer ever since.
• So where is Josh going now? He’s replacing Ilan in NIN. I shit you not. You’d think there were like three great rock drummers in the whole world sometimes.
• And now, The Weather: “Fruit Cup” by Goon
• From the Sports Desk… yes, tonight is the first NFL preseason game. It’s the Chargers at Lions, being played in Ohio for the Hall of Fame Game.
• The NFL preseason does three things: it lets coaches determine their final team roster, it lets the NFL makes some extra money via media coverage, and it’s a really terrible way for players to get injured before the actual season starts. I’m not a fan.
• Still, I do welcome football back. Maybe tonight I’ll swing by the sports book in Vegas and see if I can lose some money on a pointless game.
• But in terms of things that actually matter, here’s another look at MLB standings right now. This time, we’re going to see the overall league-wide top teams.
• 1. Brewers. 2. Cubs. 3. Blue Jays. 4. Tigers. 5. Dodgers. 6. Astros. 7. Mets. 8. Phillies. 9. Padres. 10. Yankees. 11. Red Sox. 12. Mariners. 13. Rangers. 14. Reds. 15. Guardians. 16. Cardinals. 17. Royals. 18. Giants. 19. Rays. 20. Angels. 21. Marlins. 22. Twins. 23. Diamondbacks. 24. Orioles. 25. Athletics. 26. Pirates. 27. Braves. 28. Nationals. 29. White Sox. 30. Rockies.
• The MLB season is an insane 162 games. Most teams have played between 107-109 of those games. Still a long way to go.
• Today in history… Marc Antony wins the Battle of Alexandria over Octavian, but most of his troops desert (30 BC). The oldest recorded eruption of Mount Fuji (781). All remaining Jews are expelled from Spain when the Alhambra Decree takes effect (1492). Christopher Columbus “discovers” Trinidad (1498). Odawa Chief Pontiac's forces defeat British troops at the Battle of Bloody Run during Pontiac's War (1763). Christchurch, New Zealand is chartered as a city (1856). The Nazi Party wins 38% of the vote in German elections (1932). New York International Airport is dedicated, and is later renamed John F. Kennedy International Airport (1948). Ranger 7 sends back the first close-up photographs of the moon, with images 1,000 times clearer than anything ever seen from earth-bound telescopes (1964). Michael Phelps breaks the record for most medals won at the Olympics (2012).
• July 31 is the birthday of Holy Roman emperor Maximillian II (1527), French Prime Minister Henri Brisson (1835), painter Mary Vaux Walcott (1860), animation producer Fred Quimby (1886), music producer Ahmet Ertegun (1923), guitarist/composer Kenny Burrell (1931), tennis player Evonne Goolagong (1951), actor Michael Biehn (1956), drummer/composer Bill Berry (1958), businessman Mark Cuban (1958), guitarist Stanley Jordan (1959), NFL player Kevin Greene (1962), actor Wesley Snipes (1962), DJ/musician Fatboy Slim (1963), author J. K. Rowling (1965), NFL player Gus Frerotte (1971), MLB player/manager Gabe Kapler (1975), singer-songwriter/guitarist Zac Brown (1978), actor/screenwriter B. J. Novak (1979), NFL player DeMarcus Ware (1982), and MLB player José Fernández (1992).

Okay then. Well, I wasn’t planning on doing any news at all today, so that was surprising, even to me. I can promise that won’t be the case tomorrow, Saturday, or Sunday. Time to finish packing and get my ass to Vegas. Enjoy your day.

Random News: July 30, 2025

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s July 30, 2025, and it’s a Wednesday. You are likely going to have to live without my news for a little while after today; I’m going on vacation tomorrow! That being said, I might still find some time to post a thing or two while I’m gone… consider that an undecided maybe at best.

• In the continuing saga of Donnie Dump’s involvement with convicted sex trafficker and pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, some breaking news.
• The attorney of Ghislaine Maxwell — Epstein’s partner and a woman who groomed hundreds of children for use on Epstein Island — says she will invoke her Fifth Amendment rights during a forthcoming congressional deposition unless she is granted immunity, Is given questions in advance, Is allowed to testify outside of prison, and has her petitions to courts resolved.
• The attorney, David Oscar Markus, adds however that if Maxwell receives complete clemency from Dump — a “get out of jail free card” as it were — she would be willing to testify openly in public.
• Can Maxwell be trusted? She already faces a second criminal trial for perjury on two charges that she lied under oath during a civil suit in 2015 about Epstein's abuse of underage girls. 
• Let me be clear: this woman would befriend young girls, have sex with them, train them in various sexual techniques, and then put them in situations from which they could not escape where they were repeatedly raped.
• Several of her victims were 14 years old or younger.
• She did this to not one girl or ten girls, but hundreds of them. Now tell me how you’d justify Dump pardoning her.
• Which is why the House Oversight Committee immediately declined the request to grant her immunity in exchange for testifying to Congress.
• And speaking of Dump…
• Yesterday, he offered new details over what he claims led to his falling out with Jeffrey Epstein in there mid-2000s.
• He told reporters that the breakup had to do with employees who worked at the spa at Mar-a-Lago. Epstein was recruiting girls who’d worked for Dump there.
• Dump said, "People were taken out of the spa — hired by him — in other words, gone. And other people would come and complain, 'This guy is taking people from the spa,’ I didn't know that. And then when I heard about it, I told him, I said, 'Listen, we don't want you taking our people, whether it was spa or not spa, I don't want them taking people.' And he was fine. And then not too long after that, he did it again. And I said, 'Out of here.' "
• Taking people? How do you “take” a person? And what exactly did these girls do at Dump’s spa before being “taken” by Epstein, as Dump puts it?
• Relevant side note: Dump also admitted that one of the teenagers “taken” from Mar-a-Lago by Epstein was Virginia Giuffre, who was among Epstein’s most well-known sex trafficking accusers.
• Giuffre died by suicide earlier this year. She had claimed that Maxwell spotted her working as a spa attendant at Mar-a-Lago in 2000 and hired her as Epstein’s masseuse, which led to sexual abuse.
• Let’s move on.
• Yesterday, the world experienced one of the largest earthquakes in history. The quake registered a magnitude of 8.8 and was centered off the coast of the Kamchatka Peninsula in Russia’s Far East.
• The earthquake was the strongest globally since 2011 and is among the Top 10 strongest ever detected worldwide. 
• What resulted were tsunami warnings and advisories for a broad section of the Pacific, including Alaska, Hawaii and the U.S. West Coast.
• Even Chile had to upgrade its tsunami warning to the highest level for most of its 4,000-mile Pacific coastline.
• I’ll skip to the good news: no major tsunami damage has been reported. I live less than a mile from the Pacific Ocean in Southern California, and we indeed got all the alerts to be ready to evacuate and head for higher ground.
• Tsunami advisories remain in place for Alaska, Hawaii, and parts of the West Coast, due to large aftershocks. But we’re fine, and most other places seem to be as well. Our small tsunami hit here at about 1am, and I was sound asleep, I’m happy to say.
• Tsunamis are nothing to scoff at, though. In 2004, a 9.1 magnitude earthquake off Indonesia caused waves that leveled remote villages, ports and tourist resorts along the Indian Ocean across Southeast and South Asia. Some 230,000 people died.
• And on March 11, 2011, a 9.0 magnitude quake and tsunami ravaged parts of Japan’s northeastern coast, killing about 20,000 people and triggering a nuclear meltdown.
• It seems we got lucky this time.
• Let’s move on.
• A note from the Immigration Desk, and it’s a positive one. Sort of.
• Yesterday, the Los Angeles County Board of Supervisors took a step toward prohibiting law enforcement from wearing any mask or other personal disguise while interacting with the public.
• And yes, this proposed ordinance is aimed directly at ICE, whose cowardly agents cover most of their entire face while enacting the immoral and sometimes illegal apprehension of brown-skinned people.
• In addition, the LA County Board asked county lawyers to draft a rule that would also require all law enforcement officers “to wear visible identification and agency affiliation.”
• Supervisors Janice Hahn and Hilda Solis wrote in their motion, “Residents have witnessed countless incidents of men in plainclothes or wearing tactical gear, with their faces covered by masks or balaclavas and sunglasses, while they raid communities and detain residents. They have refused to reveal their identities or even a badge when asked, leading to fear of impersonators.”
• It’s difficult to say how this will be enforced, and by whom. I don’t know how (or if) local police departments or the LA County Sheriff will stop ICE goons as they rampage through the neighborhoods.
• And Hahn said she expected the federal government to challenge the legality of any ordinance. As she said, “It's unclear if we here at the county can regulate federal agents. Ultimately, it's probably going to be decided in court.”
• Yup.
• And if the mask ban somehow becomes law, there would be exceptions — gas masks, masks to protect from fire and smoke, medical grade masks — as well as exemptions for undercover law enforcement operations.
• But if this law passes and works for LA, we can all hope that similar laws will pop up in other cities that the ICE gestapo is targeting.
• Moving on.
• In other immigration news, here’s a weird one.
• The chief of police in a Maine resort town has called for an investigation into ICE having arrested one of its officers, who the chief said was federally approved to work in the country in May.
• ICE arrested Old Orchard Beach Police Department reserve officer Jon Luke Evans last Friday, July 25. ICE claims that Evans was illegally present in the U.S. and unlawfully attempted to purchase a firearm.
• Well yeah… most cops need a gun in the USA. That’s why he’d tried to buy one. But that triggered an alert to the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives, which coordinated with ICE to make the arrest.
• Anyway, ICE admits that Evans had legally entered the U.S. in September 2023, but says he violated the terms of his admission by overstaying his visa.
• However, Old Orchard Beach Police Chief Elise Chard says that the U.S. Department of Homeland Security had verified that Evans was authorized to work in the U.S. in May of this year.
• She said the department was notified by federal officials that Evans was legally permitted to work in the country and his authorization document would not expire until 2030.
• But ICE took the cop away regardless. What kind of shitty country is this?
• Moving on.
• Might as well get this shitty news out of the way…
• Yesterday, the Senate on confirmed Emil Bove to the Third Circuit Court of Appeals. He’s a compete asshole, and is one of Dump’s personal lawyers. Now he has a lifetime appointment on the bench despite a series of whistleblower complaints about his conduct.
• Bove, currently in the No. 3 role at the Justice Department, is the subject of three different complaints in recent weeks, with two alleging he suggested violating court orders and a third saying he reportedly misled Congress on the dropping of bribery charges against New York Mayor Eric Adams.
• His nomination was confirmed with a 50-49 vote, with Republican Sens. Lisa Murkowski (R-AK) and Susan Collins (R-ME) crossing the aisle to join all Democrats in opposing his nomination.
• Chuck Schumer (D-NY) said, “They reward a man, credibly accused of wanting to lie to judges, with a black robe and gavel of his own. And they’re confirming him for one reason only: Mr. Bove is loyal to Donald Trump, therefore Donald Trump wants him on the bench. The calculus is as simple as that.”
• Sigh.
• Let’s keep moving on.
• If you’re under the false impression that you don’t buy things that will be affected by Dumpy’s tariffs, allow me to burst your bubble.
• Yesterday, Procter & Gamble said it would raise prices on about 25% of their products in the U.S. due to Dump’s tariffs.
• Economic volatility and consumer anxiety stemming from Dump's erratic tariff policies and crackdown on immigration and employment status have forced shoppers to temper spending in order to stretch their budgets.
• P&G makes tons of household basics that most Americans use daily, spanning from Bounty paper towel to Metamucil fiber supplements to Charmin toilet paper to Dawn dish soap.
• And packaged food maker Nestle — the world's biggest food producer — also said last week consumer sales in North America remained weak after similar price increases.
• In other news…
• An announcement from YouTube yesterday: they’re rolling out a new AI-powered age-estimation technology that will identify users under the age of 18.
• Uh oh.
• The company claims that the new feature is intended to protect young teens from harmful content. YouTube will now be able to assess a person's age based on the types of videos they've watched, the categories of the videos, and how long the person has had their account — regardless of the birthday associated with it.
• If the technology identifies a person as under 18, it will take extra steps to regulate their content by disabling personalized advertising and limiting repetitive views of certain kinds of content, among other things.
• What if YouTube’s AI incorrectly determines someone's age? Then the user can upload a form of identification to fix the error.
• YouTube, as you likely know, is owned by Google. It remains the most popular social media app among teens by a mile. Ninety percent of teens ages 13 to 17 said they used YouTube last year, compared with 63% who said they used TikTok.
• They’ll be testing the age-detection AI in coming weeks before rolling out the technology to a wider audience.
• I wonder what other data that this AI is compiling on you, based on what stupid-ass entertainment you get on YouTube and elsewhere?
• Let’s move on.
• Today’s Asshole of the Day is Scott Soucek, 56, of Sturgeon Bay, WI. He’s married to Stephanie Soucek, chair of the Republican Party of Door County and former chair of Wisconsin’s 8th Congressional District GOP. 
• She was a Dump delegate to the 2024 Republican National Convention, and has appeared in photos with high-profile conservatives including Dumpy as well as Glenn Beck and RNC Chair Michael Whatley.
• Welp.
• Scott was arrested and charged this month with ten counts of possession of child pornography. The charges stem from a Door County Sheriff’s Office investigation that uncovered over 300 illicit images and videos on devices linked to Soucek.
• Fascinatingly, Scott Soucek’s public online persona is that of a staunch defender of conservative values. He’s posted extensively about issues like child trafficking and moral decay.
• Last October, in a lengthy Facebook post, Soucek wrote, "I'm voting to fight against human/child trafficking... I'm voting for my children and my grandchildren to ensure their freedoms and their future."
• Soucek’s next court appearance is scheduled for late August. He remains free on a $10,000 cash bond.
• It’s at a point now where when any MAGA person who focuses steadfastly on some controversial topic, I automatically assume that person is doing the things they complain about.
• And now, The Weather: “Lou Reed” by Cory Hanson
• I mentioned up top that I’m going on vacation, and the reason I brought it up is that it’s rather unlikely that I’ll be posting news in the morning between Thursday and Sunday.
• You’ll have to figure out life without me for a short while. Here’s a tip: I’ve probably never covered anything that wasn’t available in some form from the Associated Press (also known as AP). You could go find your own news if you wanted to.
• Granted, that news doesn’t come along with my stream of profanity, along with pithy and insightful opinions of a liberal and handsome Gen-Xer. But it is still informative.
• I should also note that my son — a man in his mid-20s who weighs 240 pounds and is most likely armed — will be occupying my home during my absence.
• I also have three vicious attack animals patrolling the premises. It would be far safer to break in while I’m here than while I’m not.
• But it is my and Kat’s 20th anniversary this week, so Thursday morning, we’re getting on a jet plane and traveling to a land of mystery and intrigue. I’ll post pics while we’re there.
• Let’s do a chart.
• It’s late July 1969, and I am about seven weeks old. While I was born toward the very end of the decade, I still enjoy being a child of the 1960s.
• Think about it. I was born in the same decade as Barack Obama, but also Dave Grohl. George Clooney, but also Jack Black. Jodie Foster, but also Hugh Jackman.
• At this time, my mom and dad and I were living in Cleveland, OH. Perhaps the best thing you can say about Cleveland is that it’s not Detroit… where we moved not long after.
• Here’s the top of the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart at the time…
• 1. In The Year 2525 (Zager & Evans). 2. Spinning Wheel (Blood, Sweat & Tears). 3. Good Morning Starshine (Oliver). 4. Crystal Blue Persuasion (Tommy James And The Shondells). 5. What Does It Take (To Win Your Love) (Jr. Walker & The All Stars). 6. One (Three Dog Night). 7. Color Him Father (The Winstons). 8. The Ballad Of John And Yoko (The Beatles). 9. My Cherie Amour (Stevie Wonder). 10. Love Theme From Romeo & Juliet (Henry Mancini And His Orchestra). 11. Bad Moon Rising (Creedence Clearwater Revival). 12. Mother Popcorn (You Got To Have A Mother For Me) Part 1 (James Brown). 13. Love Me Tonight (Tom Jones). 14. Baby, I Love You (Andy Kim). 15. Too Busy Thinking About My Baby (Marvin Gaye). 16. Get Back (The Beatles With Billy Preston). 17. In The Ghetto (Elvis Presley). 18. Black Pearl (Sonny Charles And The Checkmates, Ltd.). 19. Ruby, Don't Take Your Love To Town (Kenny Rogers & The First Edition). 20. Quentin's Theme (The Charles Randolph Grean Sounde). 
• From the Sports Desk… NFL football (of the preseason variety, anyway) returns tomorrow night with the annual Hall of Fame game.
• I want to take another look at the sports gurus’ power rankings going into the season, with the goal of laughing at how mistaken they were once the season is further along.
• Fox Sports has them as follows…
• 1. Eagles. 2. Ravens. 3. Chiefs. 4. Bills. 5. Packers. 6. Steelers. 7. Commanders. 8. Bengals. 9. Lions. 10. Chargers. 11. Buccaneers. 12. Rams. 13. Texans. 14. Cardinals. 15. Vikings. 16. Broncos. 17. Bears. 18. 49ers. 19. Cowboys. 20. Jaguars. 21. Seahawks. 22. Patriots. 23. Raiders. 24. Dolphins. 25. Falcons. 26. Giants. 27. Jets. 28. Panthers. 29. Colts. 30. Titans. 31. Saints. 32. Browns.
• Yahoo Sports is somewhat but not quite aligned…
• 1. Eagles. 2. Ravens. 3. Lions. 4. Chiefs. 5. Bills. 6. Vikings. 7. Packers. 8. Buccaneers. 9. Chargers. 10. Commanders. 11. Broncos. 12. Rams. 13. 49ers. 14. Bengals. 15. Bears. 16. Texans. 17. Seahawks. 18. Cowboys. 19. Cardinals. 20. Steelers. 21. Falcons. 22. Jaguars. 23. Dolphins. 24. Colts. 25. Patriots. 26. Raiders. 27. Giants. 28. Jets. 29. Panthers. 30. Browns. 31. Saints. 32. Titans.
• Today in history… Baghdad is founded (762). The Virginia General Assembly convenes for the first time (1619). Founding of Baltimore, MD (1729). Uruguay wins its first FIFA World Cup (1930). Congress decides that “In God We Trust” is the new national motto (1956). Lyndon B. Johnson signs the Social Security Act, establishing Medicare and Medicaid (1965). Apollo 15 lands on the moon with the first lunar rover (1971). Jimmy Hoffa disappears and is never seen again (1975). 50,000 people demonstrate in Communist Poland (1981). NASA's Mars 2020 mission was launched on an Atlas V rocket from Cape Canaveral (2020). A magnitude 8.8 earthquake hits Russia, causing tsunamis over the Pacific Ocean (2025).
• July 30 is the birthday of Ming emperor Hongzhi (1470), pianist Maria Anna Mozart (1751), novelist Emily Brontë (1818), engineer/businessman Henry Ford (1863), MLB player Casey Stengel (1890), banker Henry W. Bloch (1922), puppeteer Sid Kroft (1929), guitarist Buddy Guy (1936), director Peter Bogdanovich (1939), singer-songwriter Paul Anka (1941), saxophonist/composer David Sanborn (1945), actor/politician Arnold Schwarzenegger (1947), drummer Rat Scabies (1955), actress Delta Burke (1956), lawyer Anita Hill (1956), NBA player Bill Cartwright (1957), singer-songwriter Kate Bush (1958), film director Richard Linklater (1960), actor Lawrence Fishburne (1961), actress Lisa Kudrow (1963), NBA player Chris Mullin (1963), actress Vivica A. Fox (1964), NFL player/actor Terry Crews (1968), director Christopher Nolan (1970), actress Hilary Swank (1974), and soccer player Hope Solo (1981).

I’m out of time for more news, though more news is always out there. Again, don’t expect much news from me from tomorrow through Sunday, though you never know… I might have a few bullets to post if stuff seems important enough to interrupt my vacation plans. Enjoy your day.

Random News: July 29, 2025

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s July 29, 2025, and it’s a Tuesday. Ever wake up feeling like someone randomly took a crowbar or perhaps a baseball bat, and beat you while you slept? It’s something they don’t explain to you when you’re young, and you wouldn’t believe them if they did. Anyway, there may be ibuprofen in my immediate future.

• Yesterday, Dumpy’s personal lawyers asked a judge to order Rupert Murdoch to sit for a deposition within 15 days for Dump’s $10 billion lawsuit.
• As you know, Dump is accusing the media mogul of defaming him in a Wall Street Journal article about a very strange birthday letter that Dump sent to sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.
• What’s the hurry? Well, Dumpy’s lawyers cited Murdoch’s advanced age to submit to questioning under oath as a chief argument in their motion to compel him to testify earlier than would be normal in such a lawsuit.
• Assholes. I mean, they all are, but I’m referring to Dump and his people this time.
• Judge Darrin Gayles, who is presiding over the case, filed an order directing Murdoch’s lawyers to respond to the motion by August 4.
• if you need reminder, Murdoch’s Wall Street Journal published an article saying that Dump sent the child sex trafficker Epstein a letter for his 50th birthday in 2003.
• The letter apparently contains several lines of typewritten text framed by the outline of a naked woman, which appears to be hand-drawn with a heavy marker. And it concludes: ‘Happy Birthday — and may every day be another wonderful secret.”
• Fucking weirdos.
• Side note: libel suits have historically been as gravely dangerous for plaintiffs as they are to defendants. Libel lawsuits often serve only to magnify the allegedly defamatory statements.
• A public official suing for libel must prove by clear and convincing evidence that the defamatory statements were published with actual knowledge of their falsity or a reckless disregard for the truth.
• And chances are high that the MSJ has proof that the course of the Epstein birthday card was genuine and reliable — and most likely from the files of the Justice Department.
• Also, Murdoch’s lawyers will be able to bring out just where the Journal obtained the birthday card, as well as all the torrid details of the 15-year relationship between Epstein and Trump.
• That could include such undisclosed gems as how the friendship began; how close was it; whether it involved under-age women; whether, and, if so, when Trump learned that Epstein was trafficking teenagers; when Trump learned that Epstein was engaged in criminal acts; and when there was a severance of the relationship and why.
• This suit against Murdoch might end up being Dump’s biggest mistake.
• In related news…
• A social post from the Democrats on the Senate Judiciary Committee claims that “New reporting shows there’s a FILE at the Justice Department with *all mentions* of Donald Trump in the Epstein files. It’s just sitting in a Microsoft SharePoint collaborative file. Release it.”
• I agree. Redact the names of the victims only, and then release all that shit.
• Moving on with some excellent news.
• Yesterday, U.S. District Judge Indira Talwani ruled Planned Parenthood clinics nationwide must continue to be reimbursed for Medicaid funding during their fighter survival over Dump’s efforts to defund the organization via his Big Bullshit Bill.
• The new order replaces a previous edict handed down by Talwani last week. She initially granted a preliminary injunction specifically blocking the government from cutting Medicaid payments to Planned Parenthood members that didn’t provide abortion care or didn’t meet a threshold of at least $800,000 in Medicaid reimbursements in a given year.
• Her updated order says, “Patients are likely to suffer adverse health consequences where care is disrupted or unavailable. In particular, restricting Members’ ability to provide healthcare services threatens an increase in unintended pregnancies and attendant complications because of reduced access to effective contraceptives, and an increase in undiagnosed and untreated STIs.”
• Correct.
• A provision in Dump’s bullshit tax bill instructed the federal government to end Medicaid payments for one year to abortion providers that received more than $800,000 from Medicaid in 2023, even to those like Planned Parenthood that also offer medical services like contraception, pregnancy tests, and STD testing.
• What kind of evil pricks would want to purposefully remove access to health care for women? Especially low-income women who absolutely rely on Planned Parenthood and Medicaid?
• From the International Desk…
• Yesterday, two prominent Israeli rights groups said their country is committing genocide in Gaza, the first time that local Jewish-led organizations have made such accusations against Israel during nearly 22 months of war.
• The claims by B'Tselem and Physicians for Human Rights-Israel add to an explosive debate over whether Israel's military offensive in Gaza — launched in response to Hamas' deadly October 7, 2023, attack — amounts to genocide.
• The Palestinians, their supporters, and international human rights groups make that claim, and the International Court of Justice is hearing a genocide case filed by South Africa against Israel.
• You would think that of all countries, Israel would be the most opposed to any genocidal actions and the fastest to recognize it while it happens.
• But in Israel — a country founded in the wake of the Holocaust — even the government's strongest critics have largely refrained from making such accusations.
• And in fact, the mere mention of genocide to the Jewish-Israeli public often results in accusations of antisemitism or bias against Israel.
• But explain that to the mothers of starving children in Gaza.
• Let’s keep moving on.
• Having posted one yesterday, I forgot how much I enjoyed mentioning the asshole of the day.
• Today’s AOTD is Texas state GOP Rep. Giovanni Capriglione. He’s the MAGA guy credited with having rammed through the state’s draconian six‑week abortion ban. Side note: many women are not even aware they are pregnant at that point.
• Not only does this conservative Christian admit to having had a 17-year affair with a former exotic dancer — which is frankly no business of mine and I don’t give a shit — but, according to her, also paid for a multitude of abortions.
• Though Capriglione denies the abortion controversy, he admits to the affair (“it was years ago”), and announced that he was dropping his reelection bid after a conservative news site outed the details.
• So this hypocritical piece of shit is forcing the women of Texas to give birth, but is free to fuck strippers and impregnate them and pay for multiple abortions? That’s the hypocritical GOP for you. Do as they say, not as they do.
• Funnily, Capriglione still has another year and a half left in his seventh term representing his North Texas district. Some other GOP reps in the state are asking him to resign. We’ll see how that goes.
• Moving on.
• There’s something I’ve neglected to discuss this entire month, and it’s a shame, because it’s important.
• July is Disability Pride Month. It celebrates people with disabilities, their identities, their culture, and their contributions to society.
• Disabled people make up 15% of the world's population, and represent all ages, races, ethnicities, genders, sexual orientations, religions, and socio-economic backgrounds.
• Why is it celebrated in July? Because is was in July 1990, 35 years ago, that the landmark Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) was passed.
• And how did the ADA get passed? Via an act of civil disobedience. Many of you have probably forgotten what happened on March 12, 1990, when over 1,000 people marched from the White House to the U.S. Capitol to demand that Congress pass the Americans with Disabilities Act.
• Upon arrival, about 60 activists physically demonstrated the inaccessibility of public spaces by getting out of their wheelchairs or setting aside their mobility aids and crawling up the Capitol steps.
• Police then arrested 104 activists for unlawful demonstration, many of whom were in their wheelchairs. It wasn’t a good visual when it hit the news.
• And on July 26, 1990, President George H. W. Bush signed the Americans with Disabilities Act into law. 
• While we’re on the topic, I want to mention the concept of ableism.
• The meaning is simple: ableism is discrimination and social prejudice against physically or mentally disabled people. Any situation where disabled people are classified as being inferior to non-disabled people is ableism by definition.
• I probably don’t have to tell you the stereotypes that disabled people go through. Non-disabled people regularly make assumptions — like the ideas that all disabled people want to be cured, that wheelchair users also have an intellectual disability, or that blind people have some special form of insight.
• Ableism promotes the thought that disabled people have lives that are less worth living, or are even considered expendable.
• The worst of these ideas end up in the ideology of eugenics, a purposeful movement to remove “undesirable” genetic traits from a populace by killing and/or sterilizing those who don’t meet a certain standard.
• It’s among the most vile and heartless acts of humanity. In any case, I apologize for not having noted Disability Pride Month earlier in July.
• Better late than never.
• I will end this for now by saying that every fucking day that I wake up in the morning without some chronic disease, with the full use of my body for mobility and other purposes, without severe pain and discomfort, without knowing that my life will be foreshortened due to factors beyond my control… I am grateful and know how lucky I am.
• Moving on.
• I hadn’t planned on covering the mass shooting in midtown NYC that happened yesterday. I cover news here that affects wide swaths of people, and while gun violence affects nearly everyone in the USA at some point, I can’t fill this news with every isolated incident.
• However, I did want to discuss the aspect of this murder spree to bring up the connection to immigration.
• The lone gunman killed four people in Midtown before fatally shooting himself. It was the deadliest gun attack in New York City in 25 years.
• MAGA folks tend to assume that every violent crime is committed by an immigrant. That is not the case here. The now-dead shooter, Shane Tamura, is a 27-year-old American from Las Vegas who had documented mental health history.
• But one of his victims was Didarul Islam, an NYPD Officer assigned to a Bronx precinct. Islam was a father of two and his wife is currently pregnant with a third child.
• This heroic cop is an immigrant from Bangladesh. The 36-year-old was on the force for over three years.
• Zohran Mamdani, New York’s Democratic mayoral nominee, paid tribute to Islam, saying, “When he joined the police department, his mother asked him why he would pursue such a dangerous job. He told her it was to leave behind a legacy that his family could be proud of. He has done that, and more. I pray for him, his family, and honor the legacy of service and sacrifice he leaves behind.”
• Immigrants are part of many of the most important roles in American society, from doctors and lawyers to teachers, scientists, business leaders, and yes, cops.
• And all of them are being targeted by Dump’s cruel ICE gestapo with factors that include the color of their skin and their accented English. Is that what makes America great again?
• And now, The Weather: “Chameleon” by trauma ray
• Let’s do a chart.
• We’re heading back to the end of July 1983. I’m heading into my sophomore year of high school, and am spending damn near every day of the summer at the beach.
• I literally mean every day. Each morning, my friend John and I would connect at about 10am, and choose whether to head down to Portuguese Bend Club (a private beach near our home that we’d sneak into) or make the short trip up to Redondo Beach, hanging out near Avenue C not very far from where I live now.
• Neither of us had a car or a license just yet, and yet we somehow managed to get around town okay. Sometimes I’d surf; other times, we’d just lay around in the sun, checking out girls and so on.
• And a side note: that September, I’d go see The Police on their Synchronicity tour. They were the biggest band in the world at that moment. The show, at Hollywood Park racetrack, featured opening bands The Fixx, Berlin, and the Thompson Twins.
• That is a damn fine representation of good pop music in the early ‘80s. Here’s the top of the Billboard 200 albums chart at the time.
• 1. Synchronicity (The Police). 2. Flashdance (Soundtrack). 3. Thriller (Michael Jackson). 4. Pyromania (Def Leppard). 5. The Wild Heart (Stevie Nicks). 6. Let's Dance (David Bowie). 7. Keep It Up (Loverboy). 8. Cargo (Men At Work). 9. 1999 (Prince). 10. Killer On The Rampage (Eddy Grant). 11. Frontiers (Journey). 12. H2O (Daryl Hall John Oates). 13. State Of Confusion (The Kinks). 14. Cuts Like A Knife (Bryan Adams). 15. Piece Of Mind (Iron Maiden). 16. Listen (A Flock Of Seagulls). 17. Kilroy Was Here (Styx). 18. Kissing To Be Clever (Culture Club). 19. Eliminator (ZZ Top). 20. Reach The Beach (The Fixx).
• From the Sports Desk… a sad RIP going out to Hall of Fame Chicago Cubs slugger and second baseman Ryne Sandberg, who died yesterday at 65 following a battle with prostate cancer.
• He was a 10-time All-Star and a winner of nine Gold Glove Awards and seven Silver Slugger Awards. Sandberg was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in 2005.
• Great ball player. Let this be a reminder to men over 50 — including me — to get your prostate checked.
• Today in history… The Neo-Babylonian Empire sacks Jerusalem and destroys the First Temple (587 BC). The Siege of Damascus ends in a decisive crusader defeat and leads to the disintegration of the Second Crusade (1148). Mary, Queen of Scots marries Henry Stuart (1565). The US Army Judge Advocate General’s Corps is founded when General George Washington appoints William Tudor as Judge Advocate of the Continental Army  (1775). The Arc de Triomphe is inaugurated in Paris (1836). United States and Japan sign the Harris Treaty (1858). Confederate spy Belle Boyd is arrested (1864). Land lottery begins in Oklahoma (1901). Robert Baden-Powell hosts the first Scout camp (1907). Adolf Hitler is named head of the Nazi Party (1921). After a hiatus of 12 years caused by World War II, the Summer Olympics open in London (1948). The International Atomic Energy Agency is established (1957). The Tonight Show with Jack Paar begins, starting the modern dat talk show (1957). Eisenhower signs the National Aeronautics and Space act, founding NASA (1958). David “Son of Sam” Berkowitz kills his first victim (1976). 700 million people watch the wedding of Charles and Diana (1981). British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher and President of France François Mitterrand sign the agreement to build a tunnel under the English Channel (1987). Astronomer discover the dwarf planet Eris (2005). The International Space Station temporarily spins out of control (2021).
• July 29 is the birthday of organist/composer Johann Theile (1646), historian/philosopher Alexis de Tocqueville (1805), novelist Booth Tarkington (1869), fascist politician Benito Mussolini (1883), gynecologist Bernhard Zondek (1891), businessman J.R.D. Tata (1904), actress Clara Bow (1905), guitarist Charlie Christian (1916), businessman Jim Marshall (1923), wrestler Lou Albano (1933), politician Elizabeth Dole (1936), journalist Peter Jennings (1938), actor David Warner (1941), actor Tony Sirico (1942), keyboardist/songwriter Neal Doughty (1946), filmmaker Ken Burns (1953), singer-songwriter/musician Geddy Lee (1953), singer-songwriter Martina McBride (1966), actor Will Wheaton (1972), and NFL player Dak Prescott (1993).

I genuinely don’t know why I woke up in a world of pain. How do you hurt yourself while peacefully sleeping? I really don’t mind most of the aspects of getting older — the thinning hair, the wrinkles, and so on — but this part is one I could do without just fine. Ah well. I’ll get over it. Enjoy your day.

Random News: July 28, 2025

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s July 28, 2025, and it’s a Monday. I have a busy week ahead, but for better than usual reasons that I will make clear at some point soon. In the meantime, I have a week’s worth of work to clear out of the way in the next three days. As I said, it’s going to be busy. Let’s get this news rolling.

• Dumpy the Pedo Clown is increasingly frustrated with how his administration’s handling of the furor around the Jeffrey Epstein files has dominated the news.
• Dump’s feeling of anger and woe follows weeks of missteps and no clear strategy among top officials who underestimated the outrage, especially from Dumpy’s own base.
• He’d actually thought that the country would forget about the unreleased Epstein files and move on.
• And, knowing the Dumpster, he’s going to want to make some changes. He probably already would have, but people like Attorney General Pam Bondi, FBI Director Kash Patel, and Deputy Director Dan Bongino already know what’s actually in those files.
• Dump can’t just fire them without some fear that they’ll spill the beans.
• Every time they’ve tried to push it back under the rug, a new revelation appears. The pressure intensified last week after the Wall Street Journal reported that Bondi told Dump in a May Oval Office meeting with Patel that Dumpy’s name appears multiple times in the files. 
• Bondi continues to be the target of most of the MAGA ire, and she really brought that on herself.
• In Fox News interviews earlier this year, she said “truckloads” of new documents had been delivered to her office and that Epstein’s client list was “sitting on my desk right now for review.”
• She outright said to Fox’s Sean Hannity in early March, “Everything’s going to come out to the public. The public has a right to know. Americans have a right to know.”
• We agree. Where is it, Pam?
• Shortly thereafter, the FBI put 1,000 personnel on the job to scour more than 100,000 pages of Epstein-related documents. They were told to flag any mentions of Dump and other prominent figures.
• So who knows what’s next? Dump — as we’ve mentioned many times — will say or do anything to make sure he saves his own ass. He will throw any other person to the wolves as long as he never faces repercussions for his crimes.
• A little update: Dump, at a press conference in Europe today, said he “never had the privilege of going to Epstein Island.” Jesus dude, really?
• For now, let’s move on.
• While I distrust his motives, this morning Dump said that he disagrees with Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu's claim that there is no starvation in Gaza.
• What changed his mind? He saw it on TV.
• When asked if he agreed with Netanyahu, Dump replied, “Based on television, I would say not particularly because those children look very hungry. There is real starvation in Gaza — you can't fake that."
• Well, that’s a positive step. You have to understand… I don’t WANT Dump to be an idiot. I’d prefer he be a smart and empathetic guy like our other good presidents.
• To be clear: the humanitarian crisis in Gaza is worse than ever, and ceasefire talks once again broke down last week. if it keeps going as it has been, Israel will soon have successfully committed genocide on the entire population of Palestine.
• Dump and his top aides acknowledge both privately and publicly that their strategy in Gaza hasn't worked. But they haven't yet decided whether or how to change it.
• While Dump still doesn’t quite seem clear on differentiating Hamas and the people of Palestine — he’s not great at nuanced information — he also said today that the situation in Gaza "is a mess" and stressed that civilians "have to get food and safety right now."
• That is correct.
• Relevant side note: yesterday, Netanyahu is still claiming that "there is no starvation in Gaza."
• But independent agencies including the UN and others have been reporting a growing number of deaths from starvation-related causes in recent weeks.
• Especially in children.
• Moving on.
• As you may have heard over the weekend, Dumpy announced a trade agreement with the European Union that would set tariffs at 15%.
• The EU is the United States’ largest trade partner. And a tariff, I’ll remind you, is a tax on the American people. So you will be paying more for any item made in all of Europe.
• European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen said yesterday that the agreement “will bring stability. It will bring predictability. That’s very important for our businesses on both sides of the Atlantic.”
• Stability? Does she know that Dump will not hesitate to back out of any agreement at a moment’s notice? Anyway, it’s a nice thought.
• However, Dump said 50% tariffs on steel would remain unchanged and more tariffs could still be on the way for pharmaceutical products, which Ireland is one of the top sources of.
• Dump recently threatened 200% tariffs on pharma goods. Sigh.
• Let’s just move on.
• Another global political story coming in. Today Dumpy reduced the 50-day “deadline” for Russian President Vladimir Putin to either reach a peace deal with Ukraine to less than two weeks.
• Putin has made a fool of Dump, continuing to placate him and then turning around and wreaking more destruction on Ukraine.
• What happens if Putin tells Dump to go fuck himself? According to Dump, Russia will face massive “secondary tariffs” on Moscow’s trade partners.
• The 50-day deadline was ridiculous, and Putin just ramped up the attacks on the neighboring country as a result. But Dump said today the USA does not see any progress being made.
• Dumpy said, “I’m going to make a new deadline of about 10 or 12 days from today. I’m disappointed in President Putin. Russia and Ukraine — I would have said five times we had a deal. I spoke to President Putin a lot. Got along with him very well. Then President Putin launches rockets into a city like Kyiv and kills a lot of people — in a nursing home, or wherever — and there are bodies lying all over the streets.”
• Once again, if you want Dump to take action, show him something that’s “on TV.” That’s all it takes. he doesn’t listen or read, but if something is “on TV,” he might notice.
• In other news…
• It’s a good day for Democrats in the USA. Former North Carolina Gov. Roy Cooper is entering the state’s Senate race, a win for Democrats who hope the popular former governor will give them a strong chance in one of the most competitive races next year. 
• Cooper announced his intention this morning in a social media post that leaned into attracting middle-class voters. “It wasn’t always this hard,” he said in the video launching his bid.
• His decision comes after significant speculation that he would enter following his eight years as governor in the battleground state. He’ll be trying to win the seat being vacated by retiring Republican Sen. Thom Tillis, who announced last month that he wouldn’t seek another term in office. 
• Democrats were already hopeful about their chances of picking up the seat next year, as Tillis was seen as potentially vulnerable.
• Good stuff. More of that, please.
• In related news, Paul Dans — the chief architect of the evil Project 2025 — is launching a Republican primary challenge to Sen. Lindsey Graham in South Carolina.
• That will be fascinating to watch how Dump’s loyalty will play out between Dans and Graham. Can you imagine Dump screwing over Graham now after all those times Graham sucked his… perhaps I shouldn’t got there.
• Let’s move on.
• I’m sure we’ve previously discussed Ryan Walters, the super MAGA superintendent of schools in Oklahoma. He’s best known for mandating Bibles in every classroom of public schools.
• Now he’s known for something else.
• During an Oklahoma State Board of Education executive session on Thursday, board members saw naked women appear on a TV screen in his office.
• Becky Carson, a board member who attended the meeting, said she was "disturbed" by what she saw on TV.
• “I saw them just walking across the screen, and I’m like, ‘no.’ I’m sorry I even have to use this language, but I’m like, ‘Those are her nipples.’ And then I’m like, ‘That’s pubic hair.’… I was so disturbed by it… I was very stern, like I’d been a mother or a classroom teacher. And I said, ‘What am I watching? Turn it off now!’”
• I mean… nipples! Pubic hair! My god! Snort.
• Anyway, the state’s Senate has now launched a porn probe. Ha ha!
• Moving on again.
• It’s been a bit since we had an Asshole of the Day… at least one who wasn’t named Dumpy.
• At the moment, it’s 38-year-old Fort Pierce City, FL Commissioner James Taylor. He is facing two dozen felony charges after a mom in Illinois found that he’d been sending dick pics over Snapchat to her 12-year-old daughter.
• He was also asking the little girl to send him nudes in return. God knows how many other girls he did this with before he got caught.
• They arrested Taylor on Thursday. On Friday, he was charged with 6 counts of transmission of materials harmful to minors by electronic equipment; 6 counts of transfer or display of obscenity to a minor; 6 counts of harmful communication to a minor; 4 counts of lewd computer solicitation of a child; and 2 counts of solicitation of transmission of child pornography by electronic device or equipment.
• A quick search seems to show that Taylor is the 19th MAGA Republican who’s been arrested in 2025 for child sex crimes.
• All of them are loudly anti-woke, and many claim to be Christian.
• And now, The Weather: “Cold Heart” by Nilüfer Yanya
• RIP going out to musician, singer-songwriter, satirist, and mathematician Tom Lehrer, who died on Saturday at age 97.
• A pioneer of musical black comedy starting in the 1950s, Lehrer’s influence reverberated for decades, blazing a trail for such musical satirists and comics as Randy Newman to “Weird Al” Yankovic, Harry Shearer to Jack Black.
• Was this guy smart? He entered Harvard College at the age of 15 and graduated magna cum laude in 1946. A funny quote: “I don’t like people to get the idea that I have to do this for a living. I mean, it isn’t as though I had to do this. I could be making, oh, $3,000 a year just teaching.”
• From the Sports Desk… congrats to Tadej Pogacar, who claimed his fourth Tour de France title yesterday, joining Britain's Chris Froome on the all-time winners' list.
• The 26-year-old Slovenian had previously triumphed in 2020, 2021, and 2024. He seems pretty much unstoppable.
• Two-time Tour champion Jonas Vinegaard of Denmark finished the overall race 4 minutes, 24 seconds behind Pogačar in second place. Florian Lipowitz of Germany, making his Tour debut, was 11 minutes back in third.
• Okay, so that’s done.
• In more Sports Desk news… yesterday, Bubba Wallace became the first Black driver to win on Indianapolis Motor Speedway's 2.5-mile oval, winning the Brickyard 400.
• The third NASCAR Cup victory of Wallace's career was also his biggest. It snapped a 100-race winless streak that dated to 2022 at Kansas. He also won at Talladega in 2021. It's his first win at one of NASCAR's four crown jewel races.
• Congrats to him.
• In yet more Sports Desk news, last night was the 2025 induction ceremony for the Baseball Hall of Fame. The newest members are all well-deserved: outfielder Ichiro Suzuki, starting pitcher CC Sabathia, and closer Billy Wagner.
• Ichiro is the first Japanese-born player to be inducted into the National Baseball Hall of Fame. I read the funniest Ichiro story recently.
• Mike Sweeney, who played for the Royals, had a game against Ichiro and the Mariners. It wasn’t well known how good Ichiro’s English skills were when he debuted as an MLB rookie after years of being a star in Japan.
• So after Ichito leads off the game with a screaming line drive to left-center field for a base hit, Sweeney pats him on the back and said the most basic thing possible: “Ichiro, nice batting.”
• And Ichiro — who’s never met Sweeney before this moment — replies, “Mike Sweeney, nice ass,” in perfect English with no accent at all.
• Another thing that blows me away about about that guy? Ichiro was one of the most athletically gifted people ever to play pro baseball… and he’s 5’11” and 170 pounds, which is to the very inch and pound the identical size as me. Huge ability from a not-huge dude.
• Today in history… Henry VIII marries his fifth wife, Catherine Howard (1540). Maximilien Robespierre is executed by guillotine in Paris (1794). Confederate troops make a third unsuccessful attempt to drive Union forces from Atlanta, GA at the Battle of Ezra Church (1864). The 14th Amendment to the United States Constitution is certified, establishing African American citizenship and guaranteeing due process of law (1868). The city of Miami, FL is incorporated (1896). The US occupies Haiti and stays for 19 years (1915). Lyndon B. Johnson increases US troops in Vietnam from 75,000 to. 125,000 (1965). 600,000 people go see bands rock at Watkins Glen Summer Jam (1973).  The Summer Olympics open in Los Angeles, CA (1984). The remains of a prehistoric man are discovered near Kennewick, Washington (1994).
• July 28 is the birthday of pianist/businessman Ignaz Bösendorfer (1796), writer/illustrator Beatrix Potter (1866), activist Lucy Burns (1879), painter/sculptor Marcel Duchamp (1887), actor/singer Rudy Vallée (1901), inventor/businessman Earl Tupper (1907), composer/conductor Carmen Dragon (1914), US first lady Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis (1929), singer/guitarist Junior Kimbrough (1930), guitarist Mike Bloomfield (1943), keyboardist Richard Wright (1943), cartoonist Jim Davis (1945), actress Sally Struthers (1947), guitarist/composer Gerald Casale (1948), Venezuela president Hugo Chávez (1954), guitarist/composer Steve Morse (1954), runner/activist Terry Fox (1958), NHL player Garth Snow (1969), NBA player Manu Ginóbili (1977), rapper Soulja Boy (1990), and MLB player Walker Buehler (1994).

Let’s get this news wrapped up so I can get to the other things that need doing. Let’s try and cumulatively kick some ass this week. Enjoy your day.

Random News: July 27, 2025

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s July 27, 2025, and it’s a Sunday. I am waking up with what could only be described as a food hangover. I’ll tell you more about my insane dining overindulgence from last night in a little bit. First, let’s see what’s happening around this world of ours.

• While Dumpy is out golfing — at a resort he personally owns, once again monetizing his presidency at the expense of the rest of use — I thought it would be fun to talk about his imaginary numbers.
• Last week, he told a group of Republican lawmakers that he would drive down drug prices by as much as 1,500 percent — “numbers that are not even thought to be achievable,” he said.
• He’s right about that. If you have a prescription that’s $300 and you get 100% off, that price is now free.
• “1,500 percent off” is not a real number. Neither is Dump’s claim that the cost of gasoline had fallen to $1.99 a gallon in five states.
• There is no state where gas is under $3/gallon. It’s closer to $5 here in California. Dump does these things; he pulls information out of his ass with zero concern about how easily disprovable it is.
• In that same speech, Dump congratulated Veterans Affairs Secretary Douglas A. Collins for having an approval rating of 92 percent.
• There is no information that Collins has any approval rating at all, and in this world in which we live, no political entity from any party has an approval rating close to that.
• Dump himself has an approval rating of 38%-42% depending on which recent legitimate poll you believe. That’s lower, by the way, than other recent presidents at this point in their second terms, including Obama and Bush.
• Anyway, the fact that Dump is a lying moron isn’t any kind of news, nor is the fact that he’s fucking off in Scotland playing golf badly.
• We’ll just keep the Epstein pot on simmer until he gets back from vacation.
• Onto more important things…
• After more days of killing and genocidal aid blockades — with dozens more Palestinians killed by Israeli airstrikes and gunshots in the past couple of days — the people of Gaza are finally getting a little relief.
• Jordan and UAE have been able to drop 25 tons of food aid and essential humanitarian supplies into Gaza.
• Israel — under pressure by the international community — claims they will implement pauses in fighting to allow the most urgently needed humanitarian efforts to boost aid in Gaza.
• While the air drops seem like a good idea, and they’re certainly better than nothing, it’s not nearly enough of its own.
• They’d need 160 such flights just to provide a single meal for each of Gaza’s approximately two million people. The far more significant aspect here is that “humanitarian corridors” may be opening to allow for a more steady flow of aid.
• Whatever your feelings are regarding the Israel-Hamas conflict, think good thoughts for the people of Palestine. It’s going to be a very sad mark in the history books once the true level of devastation is acknowledged.
• Moving on.
• A brief note to mention that had three court decisions not shut down — at least for now — Dump’s evil efforts, today would have been the end of birthright citizenship in the USA.
• And for awhile, it looked like he was going to get away with it. I’m sure you recall the Supreme Court decision last month that limited the use of nationwide injunctions by lower courts.
• Instead, those lower court judges have gone in a different direction, preventing Dump’s unconstitutional executive order ending birthright citizenship from taking effect for now — and possibly ever.
• And more of those lower court decisions against the Dump administration may be coming. We will look back on those judges as heroes of democracy that — if they continued being successful — kept our country alive through a very dark time.
• It was U.S. District Judge Joseph LaPlante in New Hampshire who blocked Dump’s order nationwide via a class action lawsuit brought by the American Civil Liberties Union.
• U.S. District Court Judge John Coughenour in Seattle had his decision upheld that Dump’s order was in violation of the 14th Amendment.
• And then Friday, U.S. District Judge Leo Sorokin repeated his conclusion that Dump’s order “is unconstitutional and contrary to a federal statute.”
• I state again: these judges — who are merely upholding the law as per their job descriptions — are fucking heroes, intentionally or otherwise.
• Let’s keep moving.
• Back in May, after he was sentenced to 53 years in prison for having stabbed an innocent 6-year-old Palestinian American boy to death for no reason other than his race, I wrote the following words: “Czuba will definitely die in prison, and I hope every day in there is miserable for him.”
• Well, I’m mostly happy to report that Joseph Czuba is now dead in prison at 73.
• He lasted only a couple of months locked away after his sentencing. My only regret is that he couldn’t have lived longer to be miserable. But at least he’s dead.
• Let’s move on.
• I probably don’t have to tell you to be careful of hot weather. Especially if you live in the Southeast. Summer is hot. We know this.
• But I’m telling you, this heat wave you folks down there and over the whole East Coast are getting now and moving into the coming week is some nasty shit.
• The National Weather Service issued heat advisories for a large swath of the U.S. from central Florida to Virginia. Central Florida had heat indexes reaching up to 110º F. The outlook was similar up through Georgia and the Carolinas.
• Temperatures are10 to 15 degrees above average for this time of year, with feels-like temperatures over 100 degrees expected in multiple areas as a heat dome moved across parts of the U.S.
• A heat dome — as you know by now — happens when hot air is trapped over an area due to a persistent high-pressure system. And during extreme heat and high humidity events, heat-related illnesses increase significantly.
• Stay cool, you hot people.
• P.S. High of 72 here at the beach today. Sorry, but also not sorry.
• Moving on.
• I’m pretty sure everyone on Earth has had their personal info hacked multiple times by now.
• Allianz Life Insurance Company of North America confirmed yesterday that hackers gained access to personal data on the majority of their 1.4 million customers.
• They said the data breach happened on July 16 when a malicious threat actor gained access to a third-party, cloud-based system used by the company. They notified the FBI, for what little good that will do.
• Let’s just move on.
• Hey, did you hear the one about the naked guy inside the Minnesota State Capitol Building?
• Oh wait, that actually happened. 
• On Friday night, authorities found 36 year old Dominic Terrell Peace, who was naked but thankfully nonviolent, inside the Capitol after hours. He was taken to a hospital for a mental health evaluation, and the hospital released the man.
• The next morning at 7:30am, he was back on Capitol grounds. Once again, he was taken back to the hospital. 
• And then last night at 7:30pm, Peace decided to come by for a third time. He is currently being held in the Ramsey County Jail, awaiting extradition in connection with an arrest warrant from Wisconsin.
• Sometimes you just gotta be naked, I guess.
• I mentioned up top about a night of overindulgence.
• Some of Kat’s family had come through town, so we met them for dinner at the local seafood restaurant we usually reserve for fancier occasions.
• And I make no excuses; I was a giant pig. Bread, oysters, crab cakes, calamari, my entree of pan-seared sea scallops with spinach and cremini mushrooms, and then I decided to wedge in a creme brûlée.
• It was at that point that I realized… I done fucked up.
• And now, The Weather: “Lemon Garland” by runo plum
• Let’s do a chart.
• It’s late July 1971. I am two years old. I don’t have many — if any — direct memories of that time.
• But in that month, Jim Morrison was found dead in his bathtub in Paris, France; Koko the gorilla was born at the San Francisco Zoo; and the Twenty-sixth Amendment to the United States Constitution was formally certified, lowering the voting age from 21 to 18.
• I’m sure other things happened as well. Things tend to happen. Here was the top of the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart at the time…
• 1. Indian Reservation (The Lament Of The Cherokee Reservation Indian) (The Raiders). 2. It's Too Late/I Feel The Earth Move (Carole King). 3. You've Got A Friend (James Taylor). 4. Don't Pull Your Love (Hamilton, Joe Frank & Reynolds). 5. Mr. Big Stuff (Jean Knight). 6. Treat Her Like A Lady (Cornelius Brothers & Sister Rose). 7. Draggin' The Line (Tommy James). 8. How Can You Mend A Broken Heart (Bee Gees). 9. Take Me Home, Country Roads (John Denver With Fat City). 10. Sooner Or Later (The Grass Roots). 11. Rainy Days And Mondays (Carpenters). 12. That's The Way I've Always Heard It Should Be (Carly Simon). 13. Never Ending Song Of Love (Delaney & Bonnie & Friends). 14. She's Not Just Another Woman (The 8th Day). 15. Mercy, Mercy Me (The Ecology) (Marvin Gaye). 16. Here Comes That Rainy Day Feeling Again (The Fortunes). 17. I Don't Want To Do Wrong (Gladys Knight And The Pips). 18. Bring The Boys Home (Freda Payne). 19. Beginnings/Colour My World (Chicago). 20. Hot Pants (She Got To Use What She Got To Get What She Wants) (Pt. 1) (James Brown).
• From the Sports Desk… the Little League Baseball World Series is coming quickly.
• Youth baseball players from the ages of 10-12 compete every summer with the hope of getting to Williamsport, PA, the city that’s hosted baseball's premier youth competition every year since 1947.
• Do great Little League players end up in the pros? Some of them definitely do. Stars in the LLWS include future MLB greats like Gary Sheffield (1980), Jason Varitek (1984), Todd Frazier (1998), Bryce Harper (2003), and Cody Bellinger (2007).
• But one team who won’t be at the tournament is the Cacique Mara Little League team from Maracaibo, Venezuela.
• Donnie Dump has denied the kids entry into the United Sates. Venezuela is one of several countries whose nationals are restricted or limited from travel into the U.S. under the presidential proclamation signed by Dump in June. 
• LLWS organizers say they have since replaced the team with the Santa María de Aguayo team from Tamaulipas, Mexico, which was the runner-up in the Latin American championship.
• Dump’s travel ban restrictions allegedly include an exception for “any athlete or member of an athletic team, including coaches, persons performing a necessary support role, and immediate relatives, traveling for the World Cup, Olympics, or other major sporting event as determined by the Secretary of State.”
• I guess screwing kids out of their dreams is okay for Dump and Li’l Marco Rubio.
• Today in history… Siward invades Scotland and defeats Macbeth north of the Firth of Forth (1054). England requires all goods bound for American colonies must be sent on English ships from English ports (1663). The Second Continental Congress passes legislation establishing "an hospital for an army consisting of 20,000 men,” establishing the U.S. Army Medical Department (1775). The USA establishes its first federal government agency, the Department of Foreign Affairs, later renamed the Department of State (1789). Maximilien Robespierre is arrested after encouraging the execution of more than 17,000 "enemies of the Revolution” (1794). The first transatlantic telegraph cable is completed, running from Ireland to Newfoundland (1866). Vincent van Gogh shoots himself and dies two days later (1890). The Chicago Race Riot erupts after a racial incident occurred on a South Side beach, leading to 38 fatalities and 537 injuries over a five-day period (1919). Researchers at the University of Toronto prove that the hormone insulin regulates blood sugar (1921). A cartoon called ‘A Wild Hare’ is released starring a new character named Bugs Bunny (1940). The US, China, and North Korea sign an armistice agreement ending the Korean War (1953). 5,000 more US military advisors are sent to Vietnam bringing the total to 21,000 (1964). The House Judiciary Committee votes 27-11 to impeach Richard Nixon for obstruction of justice (1974). Belarus declares independence from the Soviet Union (1990). A pipe bomb explodes at Centennial Olympic Park in Atlanta (1996).
• July 27 is the birthday of Shingon Buddhism founder Kūkai (774), Earl of Sandwich Edward Montagu (1625), pilot/engineer Geoffrey de Havilland (1882), actor Keenan Wynn (1916), writer/producer Norman Lear (1922), game designer Gary Gygax (1938), singer-songwriter Bobbie Gentry (1944), figure skater Peggy Fleming (1948), singer Maureen McGovern (1949), drummer Bobby Rondinelli (1955), singer-songwriter Julianna Hatfield (1967), wrestler Triple H (1969), actress Maya Rudolph (1972), singer-songwriter/guitarist Pete Yorn (1974), MLB player Alex Rodriguez (1975), MLB player Max Scherzer (1984), NFL player Ryan Tannehill (1988), and golfer Jordan Spieth (1993).

I’m going to take a shower and make myself feel and look more human in various ways now. Enjoy your day. 

Random News: July 26, 2025

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s July 26, 2025, and it’s a Saturday. I'm in Saturday mode. What does that entail? Well, I’m in a blue bathrobe, and I have a cup of Peet’s Cafe Domingo next to me. I’m also not hurrying through the process of news gathering as I am forced to do on a weekday. If it interests you — not that it should — my weekday schedule means that I have to be downstairs and starting my workout by 8am. But Saturday and Sunday? I do try and get this news posted by 10am, because when I don’t, other news starts preempting the shit that I’m writing, and it starts feeling irrelevant. Now you know.

• Dumples the Pedo Clown has fled the country.
• Running away to Scotland for multiple days of golf at high expense to the American taxpayer, Dumpy was mostly hoping to escape the constant barrage of scrutiny over his presence on the infamous “Epstein list” of people who’d been close associates of the disgraced financier and sex trafficker.
• I enjoy pointing out the astounding hypocrisy of the MAGA base in this regard.
• One MAGA social personality, a guy named Joey Mannarino, wrote on February 26 on this year, “The Epstein Files come tomorrow. Any living people on that list should
• immediately be jailed.”
• But on July 23, as it became more and more clear that Dumpy was one of the people in reference, Mannarino posted, “Being in the Epstein Files does not mean you're a pedophile.”
• Hahahahahaha. How did the GOP so quickly change to become the “protect the pedophiles!” party?
• Anyway, I suppose Dumpy was looking forward to a nice, peaceful trip, far away from the country where his approval rating is in the toilet and protests against him and near constant.
• But Scotland does not fuck around.
• He was greeted in Edinburgh by thousands of protestors who chanted and berated Dump with signs that read things including, "Stop Trump,” “8647," "Pipe down Donald,” "Free Gaza,” and my favorite, "South Park Was Right.”
• One more quick note on the Dump/Epstein scandal.
• As we suspected would be the case, Epstein’s partner Ghislaine Maxwell — who is currently serving a 20-year prison sentence for her role in sex trafficking children — was granted immunity before speaking with Dump’s lawyer Todd Blanche over the past two days.
• To be clear, this kind of proffer immunity is commonly granted to individuals prosecutors are seeking to have cooperate in a criminal case.
• What about a full pardon for this convicted sex trafficker of children? Dumpy was queried about it yesterday. His response?
• “It’s something I haven’t thought about it. I’m allowed to do it, but it’s something I have not thought about,” said Dumpy.
• Translation: he’s 100% definitely planning to let her free from prison with no accountability for her crimes as long as she says the right things and doesn’t implicate him.
• Again, it’s funny to me how the MAGA world wanted these child sex traffickers locked away forever… unless they can do or say something to help their cult leader.
• And then they just give them anything they want.
• Let’s move on.
• Yesterday, U.S. District Judge Lindsay C. Jenkins dismissed in its entirety Dump’s lawsuit against Illinois, Cook County, and the city of Chicago over “sanctuary city” policies that make it more difficult for Dump to enact his cruel immigration actions.
• Jenkins said the Dump administration lacks standing to invalidate the state, city, and county laws that limit cooperation with federal immigration enforcement, adding in her ruling that “contrary to the United States’s arguments, the Sanctuary Policies here do not comparably regulate ICE operations or meddle with the contractual rights of private individuals working with ICE.”
• Dumpy’s pointless suit had named Illinois Gov. JB Pritzker, Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson, the Cook County Board of Commissioners, Chicago Police Superintendent Larry Snelling ,and Cook County Sheriff Thomas Dart.
• And an extra bonus here: the judge also ruled that compelling Chicago and Illinois law enforcement authorities to assist federal agents with deportation efforts is unconstitutional.
• “It would allow the federal government to commandeer States under the guise of intergovernmental immunity — the exact type of direct regulation of states barred by the Tenth Amendment,” Jenkins added.
• Again, it’s hilarious to me that the party who screams about “States’ Rights!” gets super upset when states assert their rights.
• Pritzker wrote, “Illinois just beat the Trump Administration in federal court. Their case challenging the bipartisan TRUST Act was dismissed — unlike the President, we follow the law and listen to the courts.”
• Goddamn right.
• Moving on.
• What in the name of fuck is going on with passenger air travel in the USA?
• Yesterday, a Southwest Airlines jet took off from Hollywood Burbank airport near Los Angeles, and almost immediately had to make extreme evasive maneuvers to avoid a mid-air collision with a military jet.
• The privately owned Hawker Hunter fighter jet crossed less than two miles in front of it within a few hundred feet of its altitude.
• Passengers were terrified, with the plane feeling like it was in free fall. Two Southwest flight attendants are being treated for injuries, but no passengers were seriously hurt.
• The fighter jet was flying from El Paso, TX to Ventura County Airport in Oxnard, CA. And the FAA is investigating, of course, but I don’t trust any federal agency under Dump.
• In other news…
• The U.S. Education Department is releasing more than $5 billion in education grant funding to states.
• About a month ago, the Dump administration told states it was withholding these previously approved federal grants for further review. That announcement came a day before the July 1 deadline when those funds have traditionally been disbursed. The decision left many school districts scrambling in the lead up to the school year.
• It took lawmakers from both Democratic and Republican parties to release the funds, citing financial strain on states and local communities. Several states have also sued Dump in an effort to get the funds released.
• Of course, this relief is temporary. Dump’s budget for 2026 budget eliminates all the grants that had been frozen.
• While we’re on the topic of budget cuts via the Big Bullshit Bill that Republicans passed nearly unanimously, there’s one that maybe hasn’t crossed your radar yet, but will impact millions and millions of Americans.
• The upcoming Medicaid cuts will be a disaster for hospital emergency rooms across the country. Defunding ERs — which is part of the Big Bullshit Bill — is going to bring financial and human ruin across the land.
• As things stand today, if you have a heart attack in the United States, you might assume that an ambulance will bring you to an ER and its staff will take care of you.
• That was already becoming a problem over the past couple of decades due to hospital closures and physician shortages. If you’d visited an ER in recent years and had to suffer in the waiting area for hours before being seen, you already understand this.
• And now Dump’s Big Bullshit Bill kicks in. It cuts Medicaid spending by an estimated $1 trillion over 10 years, and puts the entire emergency-medicine safety net at risk.
• And guess what? That means it doesn’t matter if you’re a poor person on Medicaid or a wealthy person with private insurance.
• With hospitals closing and less money to hire doctors, you simply won’t have access to ER services, and you will die before even being seen by a doc. That’s true whether you’re rich or poor.
• And that’s what you get for supporting Republicans who voted to take away your tax money and give it to billionaires for their precious tax cuts. Happy now?
• Let’s move on.
• Another note from the Immigration Desk…
• The father of three Marines who was forcibly detained by ICE gestapo while at his landscaping job in California last month spoke out for the first time yesterday in emotional, tearful remarks.
• Narciso Barranco was arrested in Santa Ana, CA on June 21. Video of him being forcibly detained showed masked agents holding him down on the street and repeatedly punching him.
• He is currently out on bond after being released from federal custody on July 15, and has an immigration status hearing in August.
• One of Barranco's sons, Marine veteran Alejandro Barranco, related what happened.
• ”As he worked, he noticed masked men approaching him, and was quickly surrounded by men who did not identify themselves and never presented any type of warrant. Terrified, he ran. They chased him through the parking lot and into a crowded street. They pointed guns at him, pepper-sprayed him. They tackled him to the ground and kicked him."
• Barranco has two other sons who are currently serving as Marines. He has no criminal record. His son added, "He supported his family and paid taxes. He is a human being, but he was not treated with the basic dignity he deserved."
• I 100% agree.
• Let’s move on with a note from the Schadenfreude Desk…
• Yesterday, disgraced former congressman George Santos (R-NY) surrendered himself to a federal prison to start serving his more than seven-year sentence for fraud. 
• Ha ha.
• Santos reported yesterday afternoon as scheduled to the Federal Bureau of Prisons at the Federal Correctional Institution in Fairton, NJ. 
• The Republican ex-congressman from Long Island was sentenced in April to 87 months in prison, and was also ordered to pay $373,949.97 in fines and restitution.
• Santos told his followers he planned to request solitary confinement in prison prior to his sentencing. That seems like a terrible idea that he’d regret, if they granted it (which I doubt they would).
• Need a reminder of why Santos is incarcerated?
• Let’s see… he forged a college diploma, he presented false financial disclosures to Congress claiming he was a multi-millionaire, he faked donations in the names of relatives, he created a fake nonprofit to solicit donations, and ran a credit card fraud scheme to steal from elderly and cognitively impaired donors. 
• Santos then spent those donations on luxury items from Hermès and Ferragamo, Botox, a rent payment and other accommodations in Atlantic City and the Hamptons.
• Oh, and he’s asking Dumpy for a pardon.
• After his sentencing, he wrote ”I believe that 7 years is an over the top politically influenced sentence and I implore that President Trump gives me a chance to prove I'm more than the mistakes I've made. Respectfully, George Santos."
• Will Dumpy pardon Santos? He pardoned all the people who beat and killed cops and smeared their own shit inside the U.S. Capitol. Why not Santos too?
• And now, The Weather: “Orange” by Alex G
• From the Sports Desk… some Tour de France stage rankings, I guess? Look, football will be back soon, I promise.
• As of the 19th stage, with a total distance covered of 93.1 km (about 58 miles for you Americans), here are the leaders…
• 1. Thymen Arensman (NED). 2. Jonas Vinegaard (DEN). 3. Tadej Pogacar (SLO). 4. Florian Lipowitz (GER). 5. Oscar Onley (GBR). 6. Félix Gall (AUT). 7. Tobias Johannessen (NOR). 8. Ben Healy (IRL). 9. Valentin Paret Peintre (FRA). 10. Simon Yates (GBR).
• The Sports Desk also needs to mention A’s rookie Nick Kurtz, who pulled off one of the rarest feats in baseball last night in Houston when he hit four home runs in a single game. That, by the way, ties the all-time record.
• But wait: not only is Kurtz just the 20th player in MLB history to hit four dingers in a game; he’s the first rookie ever to do it. The guy is 22.
• And as if that wasn’t enough, his stat line at the plate sounds like something out of a video game. He went 6 for 6 with four homers, a double, six runs, and eight RBIs in the game. 
• Holy shit. How rare is this? The last American League player to hit four homers in a game was Josh Hamilton on May 8, 2012.
• Today in history… Rout of an alliance of Christian troops from Navarre and Léon against the Muslims at the Battle of Valdejunquera (920). Francis Drake, the English explorer, discovers a major bay on the coast of California, now known as San Francisco (1579). The office that would later become the United States Post Office Department is established by the Second Continental Congress, and Benjamin Franklin takes office as Postmaster General (1775). New York ratifies the United States Constitution and becomes the 11th state of the United States (1788). Liberia declares its independence from the United States (1847). George B. McClellan assumes command of the Army of the Potomac following a disastrous Union defeat at the First Battle of Bull Run (1861). Premiere of Richard Wagner's opera ‘Parsifal’ (1882). France annexes Tahiti (1891). United States Attorney General Charles Joseph Bonaparte issues an order to immediately staff the Office of the Chief Examiner, later renamed the Federal Bureau of Investigation (1908). In response to the Japanese occupation of French Indochina, the United States, Britain and the Netherlands freeze all Japanese assets and cut off oil shipments (1941). The USS Indianapolis arrives at Tinian with components and enriched uranium for the Little Boy nuclear bomb (1945). Aloha Airlines begins service from Honolulu (1946). U.S. President Harry S. Truman signs the National Security Act of 1947 into United States law creating the Central Intelligence Agency, United States Department of Defense, United States Air Force, Joint Chiefs of Staff, and the United States National Security Council… holy shit (1947). Truman signs Executive Order 9981, desegregating the military of the United States (1948). Fidel Castro leads an unsuccessful attack on the Moncada Barracks, thus beginning the Cuban Revolution (1953). A federal grand jury indicts Cornell University student Robert T. Morris, Jr. for releasing the Morris worm, thus becoming the first person to be prosecuted under the 1986 Computer Fraud and Abuse Act (1989). The Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990 is signed into law by President George H. W. Bush (1990). Launch of Discovery, NASA's first scheduled flight mission after the Columbia Disaster (2005). Hillary Clinton becomes the first female nominee for President of the United States by a major political party at the Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia (2016). 
• July 26 is the birthday of US vice president George Clinton (1739), playwright George Bernard Shaw (1856), psychiatrist Carl Jung (1875), novelist Aldous Huxley (1894), actress/comedian Gracie Allen (1895), actress Vivian Vance (1909), director Blake Edwards (1922), actor Jason Robards (1922), writer/illustrator Jan Berenstain (1923), director Stanley Kubrick (1928), singer-songwriter Dobie Gray (1940), singer Darlene Love (1941), singer-songwriter Mick Jagger (1943), actress Helen Mirren (1945), singer-songwriter/drummer Roger Taylor (1949), figure skater Dorothy Hamill (1956), actress Nana Visitor (1957), actor Kevin Spacey (1959), actress Sandra Bullock (1964), actor Jeremy Piven (1965), actress Kate Beckinsale (1973), singer-songwriter Iron & Wine (1974), UK prime minister Liz Truss (1975), and NBA player Delonte West (1983).

Well, that’s enough for now. I have things to do today, but that’s okay. Things are good. So is doing them. Enjoy your day.