Random News: October 5, 2022

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s October 5, 2022, and it’s a Wednesday. All manner of things forthcoming…

• I can’t believe this shit… in Florida, female student athletes have to report their menstrual history to play: When they got their first period, when they had their last one, etc.
• First, fuck you if you think my daughter is going to report her period details to some fucking sports coach.
• But wait, there’s more: it turns out that a third party has access to that info. I’m telling you now: if it’s not obvious to you that entire government factions are set up specifically to control women’s sexuality, you’re fucking blind.
• Vote for candidates who don’t support this. Thank you.
• Pertinent note: under Lindsey Graham’s national abortion ban bill, doctors and nurses could be put in jail for providing necessary medical care.
• They’ll have to let you die with an ectopic pregnancy or face imprisonment.
• Two days after Arizona reinstated a law from 1901 that banned abortions in the state, a 14-year-old girl who suffers from rheumatoid arthritis was denied the refill of methotrexate by a pharmacy because in high doses, it could induce abortions.
• The drug is also used to treat some cancers, arthritis and a slew of autoimmune diseases. But women can’t have it, because Republicans assume all women are whores.
• Vote please.
• Loretta Lynn passed away yesterday at age 90. If you never saw the 1980 film ‘Coal Miner’s Daughter’, I highly recommend it. She was a well-deserved icon, and may she rest in peace.
• It’s looking like Elon Musk’s purchase of Twitter is back on, and might happen soon. I really don’t care.
• One thing about me… I’m not the guy who says he’ll run away if things get bad. I’ll stay and make it a fucking nightmare for the assholes. If that’s a city or a country or a company or a media platform or whatever, to quote Dave Grohl, I’ll stick around.
• Marjorie Taylor Greene's husband, Perry Greene, has moved to withdraw a motion seeking to seal documents in their ongoing divorce case, meaning the matter could remain public.
• Gross, no thank you. We’re talking about you having to think about Marge fucking multiple guys in her gym, including a reported tantric sex guru.
• In other gossipy shit news, Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen have reportedly have hired divorce lawyers.
• Do. Not. Care.
• And now, The Weather: “Keep Me Down” by Space Equator.
• If you were upset at a mermaid being black, you might wanna skip this one. Velma Dinkley, the cartoon character from the Scooby-Doo franchise, is now officially a lesbian. It’s canon.
• Jinkies! I, for one, applaud this cartoon lesbian.
• Iranian women are continuing to show incredible courage by being publicly anti-fascist and not wearing hijabs. 
• Before 1979, Iran was a really normal, advanced place. Teheran had a big fashion scene. Then the fundamentalists took over, just like the Christofascists are trying to do in the USA.
• Shortly after their Islamist revolution in 1979, tens of thousands of Iranian women protested against the new law of compulsory hijab. They were stabbed as they chanted slogans for equal rights. Today their granddaughters avenge them.
• Irrelevant side note: Iranian women are beautiful.
• From the Sports Desk… c’mon, you know what it’s gonna be. While I was strumming my guitar at my show last night, Aaron Judge of the New York Yankees was hitting the AL (and non-steroid) record 62nd home run of the season. Big ups to that dude!
• Some polls. As I tell you ever time… polls mean nothing, votes mean everything.
• CO-03: Lauren Boebert (R-inc) 47% (+2), Adam Frisch (D) 45% (Keating)
• NJ-07: Tom Malinowski (D-inc) 48%, Tom Kean (R) 48% (GQR)
• Florida Senate: Marco Rubio (R-Inc) 46%, Val Demings (D) 46% (Clarity)
• Florida Governor: DeSantis (R-inc) 47% (+1), Crist (D) 46% (Clarity)
• Pennsylvania Senate: Fetterman (D) 46% (+6), Oz (R) 40% (Suffolk)
• North Carolina Senate: Ted Budd (R) 43% (+1), Cheri Beasley (D) 42% (Survey USA)
• Your vote — literally yours — might change history. VOTE.
• Today in history… Heraclius arrives at Constantinople, kills Byzantine Emperor Phocas, and becomes emperor (610). Louis IX, Duke of Bavaria expels Jews from his jurisdiction (1450). The Women's March on Versailles effectively terminates royal authority (1789). The Army of the Northwest defeats a British and Native Canadian force threatening Detroit (1813). An aircraft successfully destroys another aircraft with gunfire for the first time (1914). The World Series is the first to be broadcast on radio (1921). A six-month strike by Hollywood set decorators turns into a bloody riot at the gates of the Warner Brothers studio (1945). President Truman makes the first televised Oval Office address (1947). The first of the James Bond film series, based on the novels by Ian Fleming, ‘Dr. No’, is released in Britain (1962). A reactor at the Enrico Fermi Nuclear Generating Station near Detroit suffers a partial meltdown (1966). The Public Broadcasting Service (PBS) is founded (1970). Tylenol products are recalled after bottles in Chicago laced with cyanide cause seven deaths (1982). Mass demonstrations in Serbia force the resignation of Slobodan Milošević (2000). 
• October 5 is the birthday of painter Francesco Guardi (1712), president Chester A. Arthur (1829), director Louis Lumière (1864), physicist Robert H. Goddard (1882), comedian/actor Larry Fine (1902), businessman Ray Kroc (1902), actor Donald Pleasence (1919), cartoonist Bil Keane (1922), poet/politician Václav Havel (1936), singer Russell Mael (1948), musician B. W. Stevenson (1949), guitarist Fast Eddie Clarke (1950), singer Bob Geldof (1951), musician Harold Faltermeyer (1952), comedian Bernie Mac (1957), astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson (1958), actor Daniel Baldwin (1960), singer Pato Banton (1961), hockey legend Mario Lemieux (1965), basketball player Rex Chapman (1967), basketball player Grant Hill (1972), and actress Kate Winslet (1975).

Okay so… yeah. Wednesday, I guess. Got a pretty typical day ahead. Got work to do, got meetings to attend. That’s fine. I’m just going to be a typical human doing human things. I can’t think of one notable thing about today, which is often when crazy shit happens… when you least expect it. Or not. Anyway, enjoy your day.