Random News: October 28, 2023

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

---

Good morning. It’s October 28, 2023, and it’s a Saturday. I am fully enjoying the first feelings of fall weather as I chill in my blue robe, drink delicious coffee (Peet’s classic Major Dickason’s lend today), and check on news for me and you.

• Last night, law enforcement found the body of Lewiston, ME shooting rampage suspect Robert Card. He’d died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.
• Card, 40, was found in the woods near Lisbon, which is about eight miles from Lewiston. He was found in an area near the recycling center from which he had been recently fired. Sad end to a sad tale, though it’s good to know that Card doesn’t remain a threat to folks in the area.
• In typical American fashion, after Card’s body was found, Maine immediately lifted its temporary hunting restrictions so people could get back to carrying around their high-powered rifles.
• I have nothing more to say on that for now. In a country where a certifiably insane person can legally purchase and carry a high-powered firearm with massive ammunition capacity in many places with no legal route to prevent him from whatever happens next, the only thing I can do is vote for representatives in government who don’t support such things.
• That’s it. Moving on to some breaking news…
• Mike Pence, the former vice president, has dropped out of the 2024 presidential race as of this morning.
• No one was going to vote for Mike Pence.
• In other news…
• I feel like we need to once again make sure folks are aware about Mike Johnson (R-LA), the Speaker of the House and the person second in line to the Presidency.
• Johnson has a chummy chat with Fox’s Sean Hannity this week. He said his first order of business was to start negotiating with the White House about funding bills.
• Johnson is going to insist on cuts to fund the government when funding lapses in less than three weeks. He mentioned the Republican plan that would call for an 8% cut of government spending, a sure nonstarter for the White House and the Senate.
• In somewhat hopeful news, unlike most Republicans, Johnson supports more funding to help Ukraine fight off Russia, but he has a list of 12 demands make sure the money is well-spent. Johnson also wants to cut the U.S. budget in exchange for Israel support.
• Johnson also did a big backpedal when his documented views on the rights of LGBTQIA+ people were brought up to him. He said to Hannity that “he doesn’t even remember all of that stuff”, referring to his long track record of anti-gay bigotry.
• He said he was just doing his job as a religious freedom attorney. As such, he was actively fighting against same-sex marriage, legal rights for same-sex domestic partners, and arguing before the Supreme Court that states should be able to outlaw same-sex intercourse.
• But today, miraculously, Johnson claims he follows the rule of law and loves all people, “regardless of their lifestyle choices.”
• Fact check: being gay isn’t a lifestyle choice and more than being short is an elevation choice.
• But perhaps most concerning of all is Johnson’s statement in that interview that an easy way into his mind is to “go pick up a Bible off your shelf and read it. That’s my world view. That’s what I believe. And so I make no apologies.”
• From the very start of the United States, the separation of church and state is a key defining point of our nation. It’s also important to note that the USA has no official religion or any requirement for religion at all, and that hundreds of different religions and beliefs are practiced here. Maybe Johnson can put down the Bible for awhile and take a high school-level civics class.
• Moving on to the latest tale of master criminal El Dumpo and his actual trials and hopeful tribulations.
• Dumpy is set to testify November 6 at his New York civil fraud trial, following his three eldest children to the witness stand in a case that, if there’s any justice in the world, will annihilate their family's real estate empire.
• As officers of the accused Trump Organization, it was already expected that Dumples and and sons Dumpy Jr. and L’il Eric Dump would testify. But then yesterday, Judge Arthur Engoron ruled that daughter Vanky also must appear. She’d asked to not testify and was shot down.
• In New York Attorney General Letitia James' lawsuit, it’s alleged that the Dump Crime Fam overstated Dumples’ wealth for years on financial statements that were given to banks, insurers and others to help secure loans and deals.
• That’s illegal, kids. That’s fraud.
• Let’s move down to Mississippi, where in less than two weeks on November 7, a surprising tight race for governor could end up with incumbent Republican Gov. Tate Reeves in a runoff with Democratic challenger Brandon Presley… the cousin of Elvis.
• In that state, if no candidate on the general election ballot receives more than 50% of the vote, the top two vote-getters will participate in a runoff election on Nov. 28, just five days after Thanksgiving. Recent polling has Reeves under the 50% threshold.
• Having a Democratic governor in a typically deep-red state would be nothing but good for the people of Mississippi. Let’s go Presley!
• Moving up to New York, where yesterday Rep. George Santos (R-NY) pleaded not guilty to the charges accusing him of stealing people’s identities, making charges on his donors’ credit cards without their authorization, and lying to federal election officials.
• His trial was set for September 9, 2024, just before Santos’ attempt to get re-elected despite all the insanity around him, and is expected to last three weeks. The reality is that Santos may have long lost his Congressman’s job by then; a vote is scheduled next week to eject him from the House.
• Heading over to Ohio, the November election is focused on the state’s Issue 1 that enshrines women’s rights to have abortion access in the state Constitution.
• Supporters of the proposal have raised three times more than their opponents, and it’s easy to see why. Issue 1 gives voters the choice if they want to legalize and protect access to abortion, contraception, fertility treatment, miscarriage care and continuing a pregnancy. It would also prohibit the state from interfering or penalizing an individual's voluntary exercise of this right or anyone or entity that helps in utilizing this right.
• But things being as they are, there’s also a big contingent of Ohio conservatives — primarily men — who want to control women’s reproductive rights. They are busy posting and advertising misleading and completely false information about the initiative.
• I have faith in Ohio to do the right thing. This election will be very closely watched as Ohio is the only state to put an abortion rights question before voters this fall, making it a testing ground for messaging ahead of the 2024 elections when it’s expected to be on the ballot in more states and a massive factor in races up and down the ballot.
• YES ON ISSUE 1.
• In our continuing coverage of the pieces of shit who attempted a coup against the United States on January 6, 2021, meet Jacob Travis Clark of Colorado Springs, CO.
• Yesterday, he was sentenced to nearly three years in prison. Clark hit a police officer with a 2x4 wooden plank during the insurrection, and was found guilty of obstructing an official proceeding, a felony, as well as five misdemeanor counts related to his conduct at the Capitol.
• More than 1,100 people have been charged for crimes related to the January 6 Capitol insurrection.
• Going back for a moment to the 2024 presidential race. Ron DeSantis is being ridiculed by Israeli diplomats, Florida Democrats, and the White House after he falsely claimed credit for a gun-running operation to assist Israel’s military operations in Gaza.
• He’d claimed on Thursday that he had worked with Israel’s consul general in Miami to send military equipment, including drones, body armor and helmets. Sounds pretty MAGA, huh?
• Except his bullshit fell apart yesterday when Maor Elbaz-Starinsky, Israel’s consul general, said he had not asked for DeSantis’s help, and that the governor’s involvement was limited to smoothing paperwork requirements for a previously arranged shipment of “rifle parts”.
• Hahahahahahaha. Jesus.
• And now, The Weather: “Donut” by Wishy
• Rest in peace to Richard Moll, the actor best know for his role as the bailiff Bull on the original "Night Court" sitcom. He’s died at 80.
• Sad Fact: of the entire original cast of “Night Court”, only John Larroquette and Marsha Warfield remain among the living.
• Got a chart for you, from this week in 1987. It’s Billboard’s Album Rock tracks, a chart and entire category of music that no longer exists because only weirdos like me buy albums.
• 1. Love Will Find A Way (Yes). 2. Brilliant Disguise (Bruce Springsteen). 3. The One I Love (R.E.M.), 4. Strap Me In (The Cars). 5. Time Stand Still (Rush). 6. Learning to Fly (Pink Floyd). 7. Tunnel of Love (Bruce Springsteen). 8. One Slip (Pink Floyd). 9. Throwaway (Mick Jagger). 10. Animal (Def Leppard). 11. Rhythm of Love (Yes). 12. Steel Monkey (Jethro Tull). 13. Is This Love (Whitesnake). 14. Crazy (Icehouse). 15. Showdown at Big Sky (Robbie Robertson). 16. Rag Doll (Aerosmith). 17. Got My Mind Set On You (George Harrison). 18. Cherry Bomb (John Cougar Mellencamp). 19. Truck Drivin’ Man (Lynyrd Skynyrd). 20. We’ll Be Together (Sting).
• From the Sports Desk… an incredible finish to Game 1 of the World Series, which had Arizona leading all the way up to the bottom of the ninth inning when former Dodger Corey Seager smashed a 2-run homer for Texas to tie it up and send the game to extras. The Rangers ended up winning 6-5 in the 11th to take a 1-0 lead in the series.
• Today in history… Beijing is officially designated the capital of the Ming dynasty when the Forbidden City is completed (1420). Christopher Columbus lands in Cuba on his first voyage to the New World, surmising that it is Japan (1492). Ferdinand Magellan reaches the Pacific Ocean (1520). The Massachusetts Bay Colony votes to establish a theological college, which would later become Harvard University (1636). Jonathan Swift’s novel 'Gulliver's Travels’ is published (1726). US president Grover Cleveland dedicates the Statue of Liberty (1886). The U.S. Congress passes the Volstead Act over President Woodrow Wilson's veto, paving the way for Prohibition to begin the following January (1919). Italian fascists led by Benito Mussolini march on Rome and take over the Italian government (1922). The Cuban Missile Crisis ends and Premier Nikita Khrushchev orders the removal of Soviet missiles from Cuba (1962). US President Barack Obama signs the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act (2009). 
• October 28 is the birthday of philosopher Erasmus (1466), businessman Eliphalet Remington (1793), costume designer Edith Head (1897), author Evelyn Waugh (1903), biologist Jonas Salk (1914), actor Jack Soo (1917), businessman Bowie Kuhn (1926), singer/keyboarist Graham Bond (1937), NBA player/coach Lenny Wilkins (1937), singer/guitarist Hank Marvin (1941), actor Dennie Franz (1944), athlete Caitlyn Jenner (1949), actress Annie Potts (1952), businessman/philanthropist Bill Gates (1955), drummer Stephen Morris (1957), actress Jami Gertz (1965), NFL player Steve Atwater (1966), TV host Andy Richter (1966), singer-songwriter/guitarist Ben Harper (1969), singer-songwriter/guitarist Brad Paisley (1972), singer-songwriter/rapper Frank Ocean (1987), and DJ/producer Jamie xx (1988).

That’s enough news. I need a shower. Enjoy your day.