Random News: October 31, 2023

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Ghoul morning, you little goblins. It’s October 31, 2023, and it’s a Tuesday, and it’s Halloween (lightning crackles, thunder booms). Mwa-ha-ha-ha! The world is a scary place, but I’m a ghost walking around in a fleshy body so nothing frightens me. Let’s do some news.

• A reminder that Election Day in the USA is in one week, on Tuesday November 7. This being an odd year, a lot places don’t have significant elections going on… but some places have extremely important elections happening.
• One of them is Ohio, where the main event on the ballot is Issue 1, a proposal that will codify the rights of Ohioan women to have control over their own reproductive choices in stead of handing that decision to the state.
• YES ON ISSUE 1. Spread the word, please.
• When questions about abortion have been put directly to voters in the months since the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, voters overwhelmingly have signaled support for abortion access.
• Conservatives and others who want to force women to give birth were shocked when states like Kansas and Michigan enshrined choice into law. Now it’s Ohio’s turn, and the rest of the country will be watching very closely.
• Important note: while it’s too late to do anything about it, Ohio Secretary of State Frank LaRose purged more than 26,000 voters from voter rolls in September due to inactivity.
• LaRose hasn’t announced the canceled voter registrations yet, but his office’s website has an updated database of purged voters.
• Ohio voters who were purged from the rolls can re-register to vote on the Secretary of State website, but those who were removed in September and did not register before October 10 cannot vote in the November 7 election.
• Always ask yourself why Republicans are always trying to get less people to vote by repressing the vote in numbers ways, while Democrats always encourage more people to vote.
• Maybe there’s a reason for that.
• Moving on.
• An Illinois man has officially been with a a hate crime, in addition to murder and attempted murder, for having stabbed a little boy named Wadea Al-Fayoume to death for no other reason than his Muslim background. Wadea was six years old.
• Joseph Czuba, 71, was a landlord in Plainfield, IL, who attacked the child and his mother after she had urged him to "pray for peace” in regard to the Israel/Hamas war.
• I can only hope he’ll spend all of his remaining years in prison. It won’t bring the kid back, but at least he won’t be out stabbing other children due to the color of their skin or their country of origin.
• In other news of total assholes, meet John Anthony Miller of Nevada.
• The 43-year-old Las Vegas resident was arrested and charged with leaving threatening and antisemitic messages on the office voicemail of a U.S. senator. He also traveled to a federal courthouse in Las Vegas where the senator has an office.
• Miller left numerous menacing voicemails between October 17-19 for Democratic Sen. Jacky Rosen, who is Jewish. Among other things, Miller called the senator "vermin" and threatened to "finish what Hitler started."
• Here’s one of his messages… "You done picked your side bitch and you done chose evil. I don't give a fuck if you were born into it or not, bitch, you are fucking evil, bitch, and we're gonna exterminate you."
• Antisemitic incidents in the U.S. climbed 388% in the wake of the terrorist attacks earlier this month, compared to the same period last year.
• And in other very sad news from the Middle East conflict, the body of 23-year-old German-Israeli woman Shani Louk was found and identified. You likely know that when Hamas attacked the Nova music festival, Louk was kidnapped, presumably sexually assaulted and tortured, and paraded around Gaza by Hamas terrorists.
• If you’re looking for good guys in wars, well, there aren’t any. If you’re looking to take a side, you’re going to side with some good people and some bad people. No one wins wars. They are barbaric and anachronistic ways of solving problems.
• But humans have yet to evolve to the point where other options are prioritized.
• Moving on.
• Yesterday, House Republicans led by new Speaker Mike Johnson unveiled a proposal to pay for emergency aid for Israel’s war against Hamas… but only if there were cuts to IRS funds aimed at cracking down on rich tax cheats and improving taxpayer service.
• So, to be clear, the Republicans say that Israel can only be helped if rich people are allowed to cheat on their taxes.
• What the actual fuck? Who votes for these fucking people?
• Let’s move on.
• A trial that began yesterday argues that Donald John Trump should be disqualified from Colorado's ballot in next year's election because he incited a violent mob in Washington on January 6, 2021.
• A lawsuit brought by Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington is a test case for whether a provision of the U.S. Constitution that bars people who have engaged in "insurrection or rebellion" from holding federal office, can prevent Dumpy from being president again.
• Is it legit? Let’s see…
• 14th Amendment, Section 3 - Disqualification from Holding Office: No person shall be a Senator or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and Vice-President, or hold any office, civil or military, under the United States, or under any State, who, having previously taken an oath, as a member of Congress, or as an officer of the United States, or as a member of any State legislature, or as an executive or judicial officer of any State, to support the Constitution of the United States, shall have engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof. But Congress may by a vote of two-thirds of each House, remove such disability.
• The Dumpster spent weeks before the January 6 riot spreading false claims of widespread voter fraud in his November 2020 election loss to Democrat Joe Biden and encouraging his supporters to rally in Washington. He then encouraged them to march on the U.S. Capitol where Congress was certifying Biden's win. Only after hours of violence did he appeal to the rioters to go home.
• Colorado is regarded as safely Democratic, so regardless of whether Trump is on the ballot, President Biden is expected to win the state.
• Is this actually going to matter? Probably not. Most legal experts call the strategy a long shot.
• But Colorado District Court Judge Sarah Wallace has denied five separate bids by Dumples and his allies to dismiss the case, most recently on October 25.
• Moving on to another January 6 story.
• Yesterday, a physical altercation broke out during a hearing in the case of Vitali GossJankowski, a defendant convicted of several charges related to the January 6, 2021 failed coupe attempt.
• Judge Paul Friedman of the U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia ordered GossJankowski jailed for a series of recent doxxing threats targeting federal agents. Then the defendant, who is about 6’3” and looks like an NFL defensive end, freaked out and started fighting people and smashing shit.
• It took seven U.S. Marshals and FBI staff members to corral the big dumbass.
• GossJankowski was eventually removed from the court and taken to the D.C. jail. His sentencing date isn't set yet.
• Yikes.
• Moving on… to another asshole.
• Federal authorities have charged Arthur Ray Hanson II of Huntsville, AL with threatening two Fulton County law enforcement officials in connection with the investigation of accused criminal Donald John Trump.
• Hanson called the county’s customer service line on August 6 — a week before El Dumpo was indicted — and left a threatening and expletive-filled voicemail.
• “If you think you gonna take a mugshot of my President Donald Trump and it’s gonna be ok, you gonna find out that after you take that mugshot, some bad shit probably gonna happen to you.”
• Then he said, “I’m warning you right now before you fuck up your life and get hurt real bad,” “whether you got a fucking badge or not ain’t gonna help you none” and “you gonna get fucked up you keep fucking with my president.”
• Sounds pretty normal for a MAGA.
• Since it’s Halloween, let’s do some more news of frightening piece-of-shit humans.
• Ex-Republican state Sen. Ray Holmberg of North Dakota has been arrested and charged with traveling to Prague with the intent to rape a minor.
• He was also charged with one count of receiving and attempting to receive images depicting child sexual abuse. He was taken into custody on yesterday in Grand Forks.
• He’s 79, so again, you can only hope he dies in prison.
• Moving on.
• Today, the Supreme Court will hear oral arguments in the first two cases involving social media’s free speech, both of which ask whether public officials can constitutionally block their constituents on social media.
• One case centers on a city manager in Michigan who decided he would block someone posting what he called “creepy” smiley emoji’s on his Facebook page, amid criticism of the manager’s COVID-19 response.
• The central question is whether social media blocks should be considered “state action,” which makes them subject to the First Amendment. Interesting.
• And now, The Weather: “Nitelike” by R. Missing
• It’s supposed to be super cold in places like Chicago and around the Midwest today. Please dress your trick-or-treaters accordingly.
• It’s time for our annual list of most popular Halloween candy. This year the list is from Instacart, who tracked the top sellers by total weight sold for the past month.
• 1. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups 2.Peanut M&M’s 3. Regular M&M’s 4. Tootsie Pops 5. Twizzlers 6. Hershey's Milk Chocolate 7. Sour Patch Kids 8. Candy Corn 9. KitKat 10. Starburst 
• Three newcomers on this year’s list compared to last: Tootsie Pops, Sour Patch Kids, and Candy Corn. Year round, the most popular candies vary by state. In California, it’s Red Vines. In Colorado, it’s Peanut M&M’s. In Florida, it’s Dum Dums.
• Stopping myself from saying anything snarky about Florida. Deep breath. Okay.
• From the Sports Desk… in Game 3 of the World Series last night, the Texas Rangers hung on for a 3-1 victory over the Arizona Diamondbacks. They lead the series 2-1, but injuries to both Max Scherzer and Adolis Garcia could leave them vulnerable in Game 4 tonight. 
• Also in Sports, the Las Vegas Raiders played embarrassingly badly against the Detroit Lions last night on Monday Night Football. In fact, the Lions didn’t even play that well and still beat the Raiders 26-14.
• From the kinda-Sports Desk… congrats to Magic Johnson, who became the fourth athlete in history to earn billionaire status. The other three are Michael Jordan, LeBron James, and Tiger Woods.
• Magic made a paltry $40 million playing in the NBA, but his wealth doesn't come from basketball. His career as a businessman is how he got super rich. He made savvy investments in the Lakers, Dodgers, and Starbucks, and opened tons of restaurants and movie theaters. He is now the chairman and CEO of Magic Johnson Enterprises. Happy for him.
• And in breaking Sports Desk news, the Philadelphia 76ers have traded star guard James Harden to the Los Angeles Clippers this morning. In exchange for Harden, the Clippers sent Robert Covington, Nicolas Batum, KJ Martin, Marcus Morris Sr. and draft picks to the 76ers.
• Honestly? Bad idea. Harden is getting older and is a guy who constantly complains and blames his own team for everything. I think the Clippers will regret this.
• Today in history… Byzantine Empress Irene is deposed and banished to Lesbos (802). Nevada is admitted as the 36th U.S. state (1864). Dedication of the Lincoln Highway, the first automobile highway across United States (1913). Benito Mussolini is made Prime Minister of Italy (1922). After 14 years of work, Mount Rushmore is completed (1941). Indian Prime Minister Indira Gandhi is assassinated by two security guards (1984). Iraq announces it would no longer cooperate with United Nations weapons inspectors (1998). Soyuz TM-31 launches, carrying the first resident crew to the International Space Station (2000). A federal grand jury in Houston, Texas indicts former Enron chief financial officer Andrew Fastow on 78 counts of wire fraud, money laundering, conspiracy and obstruction of justice (2002). The global population of humans reaches seven billion (2011). 
• October 31 is the birthday of Portugal king Ferdinand I (1345), Portugal king Edward (1391), painter Johannes Vermeer (1632), physicist Laura Bassi (1711), Portugal king Luis I (1838), Girl Scout founder Juliette Gordon Low (1860), photographer Helmut Newton (1920), journalist Dan Rather (1931), actress Sally Kirkland (1941), actor David Ogden Stiers (1942), NFL player Brian Piccolo (1943), songwriter Russ Ballard (1945), actor John Candy (1950), journalist Jane Pauley (1950), bass player Bernard Edwards (1952), author Neal Stephenson (1959), director Peter Jackson (1961), drummer Larry Mullen, Jr. (1961), guitarist Johnny Marr (1963), rapper Ad-Rock (1966), rapper Vanilla Ice (1967), songwriter Adam Schlesinger (1967), and singer Willow Smith (2000).

Okay, I have things to do. Happy Halloween everyone! Enjoy your day.