Random News: September 29, 2025

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s September 29, 2025, and it’s a Monday. It looks like a lovely day out there as the sun starts to peek over the eastern horizon. I got a good night’s sleep and am feeling a little more optimistic about facing the day, even though it’s Monday. I’m sure that enthusiasm will fizzle once I get through this news and into my work day.

• Let’s get rolling.
• Yesterday, the state of Oregon filed a lawsuit against Dumpy after the Orange Menace said he will send troops to Portland.
• It comes after Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth sent a memo to Governor Tina Kotek authorizing 200 members of the Oregon National Guard to the city of Portland, per state Attorney General Dan Rayfield.
• The troops are to be deployed for 60 days to protect federal property "where protests are occurring or likely to occur.”
• The lawsuit argues that Dump lacks authority to federalize the National Guard. California filed a similar lawsuit in June after the administration sent troops to Los Angeles.
• A reminder, if you missed it yesterday: Dump ordered Hegseth to send "all necessary Troops to protect War ravaged Portland, and any other ICE Facilities under siege from attack by Antifa, and other domestic terrorists."
• Fucking douchebag.
• Gov. Kotek said, “When the president and I spoke yesterday, I told him in very plain language that there is no insurrection or a threat to public safety that necessitates military intervention in Portland or any other city in our state. Despite this, and with all evidence to the contrary, he has chosen to disregard Oregonian safety and ability to govern themselves.”
• And apparently Dumpy is getting confused about PDX as well.
• "I spoke to the governor, she was very nice," Dump said. "But I said, 'Well wait a minute, am I watching things on television that are different from what's happening? My people tell me different.' They are literally attacking and there are fires all over the place… it looks like terrible."
• Jesus fucking Christ.
• Let’s move on.
• New York City Mayor Eric Adams is dropping out of the race, ending his reelection bid at the order of Dumpy and other Republicans who have wanted to consolidate the opposition against popular Democratic nominee Zohran Mamdani.
• Mamdani, a democratic socialist, notched a huge win in June’s Democratic primary over former New York Governor Andrew Cuomo, who is now mounting an independent campaign.
• Dump and other conservatives are now backing Cuomo in a big way. They’re scared to death of Mamdani. But Adams dropping out isn’t going to give a big boost to Cuomo.
• Adams had been running fourth in most public polls behind Mamdani, Cuomo, and Republican nominee Curtis Sliwa.
• And state and national Democrats are increasingly coalescing around Mamdani in recent weeks due in part to Dump’s push to reshape the race in Cuomo’s favor. The election is just over five weeks away on November 4.
• Moving on.
• I think you can count on a government shutdown starting on Wednesday. The Democrats are holding tough, and Dump said yesterday, "I just don't know how we are going to solve this issue.”
• How about give in to the Democrats’ simple request for health care for Americans?
• As we mentioned, Dumpy is meeting with congressional leaders today ahead of the October 1 deadline for lawmakers to reach an agreement on a spending bill that would avert a shutdown.
• Dump is privately cherishing the idea of a shutdown, welcoming the prospect because it will enable him to wield executive power to slash some government programs and salaries.
• But Democrats have forcefully pushed back against Dump's mischaracterization of their positions on both government funding and on immigration. And they have repeatedly noted that people who are in the U.S. illegally are not eligible to receive Medicaid coverage. 
• The Democrats are fighting for all Americans’ health care. Dump and the Republicans are shitting on it. End of story.
• This weekend, House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries said, “What we are doing is fighting to protect the healthcare of everyday Americans in the midst of this Republican-caused crisis that is devastating hospitals and nursing homes and community-based health clinics.”
• The meeting scheduled for today has Dump talking to Senate Majority Leader John Thune, Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer, House Speaker Mike Johnson, and Jeffries.
• Let’s move on.
• I stopped covering every significant instance of gun violence in this column. I did that for a solid year and it was so discouraging — with no signs of any changes — that I sort of gave up.
• But I will mention yesterday’s attack on The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Grand Blanc, MI. 
• As you’ve probably heard, Thomas Jacob Sanford, 40, drove his truck into the church and started shooting congregants, then set the building on fire with hundreds of people inside. Sanford was later killed in a shootout with responding police.
• At least four people were killed and eight others were injured in the shooting and fire. Officials say they believe more victims will be found as they comb through the rubble.
• So who is this Jake Sanford asshole? He was a veteran of the Iraq War, and served four years in the Marines, rising to the rank of sergeant.
• Donnie Dump already weighed in, writing, “This appears to be yet another targeted attack on Christians in the United States of America.”
• Perhaps. But if so, it was done by one of his own. Sanford was pictured wearing Dump-supporting clothing with slogans saying, “Make Liberals Cry Again.” He’d had a Dump sign in his yard.
• So watch how quickly this guy disappears from media coverage as a result.
• And in another weekend mass shooting, 40-year-old Nigel Max Edge was arrested in a Saturday mass shooting in North Carolina that killed three people and injured five.
• He’s been charged with three counts of first-degree murder, five counts of attempted first-degree murder, and five counts of assault with a deadly weapon with intent to kill. He is currently held without bond.
• Edge is also a former Marine and an Iraq War vet. Odd coincidence, I suppose. No word yet on whether he was also a Dump supporter like Sanford.
• So far this year, in the USA there have been at least 324 mass shootings — in 272 days. Mass shootings are most often defined as an incident where at least four people are shot.
• Let’s just move on. What else can we do?
• From the Entertainment Desk…
• Yesterday, millions of MAGAs nearly shit their pants when it was announced that the 2026 Super Bowl halftime will be headlined by Puerto Rican rapper and singer Bad Bunny.
• Mr. Bunny commented, “Ve y dile a tu abuela, que seremos el HALFTIME SHOW DEL SUPER BOWL.”
• Does this guy has the qualifications to be the Super Bowl halftime performer? You bet. Four No. 1 albums, 113 (!) Hot 100 hits (including 15 top 10s), three Grammys, one No. 1 single and much more.
• But he also canceled a number of US-based concerts this year, not wanting to put his fans in danger of being abducted by ICE… which they would have been.
• The fact that this guy is perceived as anti-Dump, anti-ICE, and sings most of his songs in (gasp) Spanish is already making MAGA scream about boycotting the entire Super Bowl. I’m loving it. And it feels purposeful, which I also love.
• With Kendrick Lamar last year and now Bad Bunny this year, it almost feels like the NFL is trolling the racists of the country, and I’m all here for it.
• Can you imagine Dumpy trying to sign an executive order to keep Bad Bunny from performing? I can 100% see that.
• Let’s also acknowledge that Bad Bunny is an American. Puerto Rico is a U.S. territory. People born there are U.S. citizens, in case you’re confused.
• Super Bowl LX will be held on February 8, 2026, at Levi’s Stadium in Santa Clara, CA.
• Moving on with some actual weather news…
• Eastern U.S. people, be prepared for tropical storm Imelda, which is forecast to strengthen into a hurricane as it moves off the Southeast coast this week, kicking up dangerous surf, rip currents, coastal flooding, and beach erosion from Florida through the Carolinas.
• And at the same time, Hurricane Humberto, which briefly exploded into a rare Category 5 storm with 160 mph winds Saturday, is now a large Category 4 hurricane. Located a few hundred miles east of Imelda, Humberto’s massive size will compound the hazards for US beaches this week, driving deadly rip currents and big waves farther north along the East Coast than Imelda alone.
• Be safe, my peoples.
• And now, The Weather: “Magic” by Nameless Warning
• From the Sports Desk… ladies, gentlemen, and nonbinary sports fans, we have a final MLB playoff picture. Here we go…
• American League Wild Card: 6-seed Tigers at 3-seed Guardians. 5-seed Red Sox at 4-seed Yankees. 1-seed Blue Jays and 2-seed Mariners have a bye until the divisional round.
• National League Wild Card: 6-seed Reds at 3-seed Dodgers. 5-seed Padres as 4-seed Cubs. 1-seed Brewers and 2-seed Phillies get the bye.
• All Wild Card series start on Tuesday.
• In other Sports Desk news, the NFL had a crazy day yesterday with upset wins by the Steelers, Falcons, Giants, Jaguars, and Chiefs… and an even more unlikely 40-40 tie between the Packers and Cowboys last night.
• Tonight’s two MNF games are the Jets at Dolphins (battle of the winless wonders), and the Bengals at Broncos.
• Today in history… Danes capture Canterbury after a siege, taking Ælfheah, archbishop of Canterbury, as a prisoner (1011). Frederick II, Holy Roman Emperor, is excommunicated by Pope Gregory IX for his failure to participate in the Crusades (1227). Protestant coup officials in Nîmes massacre Catholic priests in an event now known as the Michelade (1567). The United States Department of War first establishes a regular army with a strength of several hundred men (1789). Germany's Supreme Army Command tells Kaiser Wilhelm II and Imperial Chancellor Georg Michaelis to open negotiations for an armistice in WWI (1918). The First American Track and Field championships for women are held (1923). The Kyshtym disaster is the third-worst nuclear accident ever recorded (1957). NASA launches STS-26, the first Space Shuttle mission since the Challenger disaster (1988). John Roberts is confirmed as Chief Justice of the United States (2005). The stock market crashes after the first United States House of Representatives vote on the Emergency Economic Stabilization Act fails (2008). Over 42 people are killed by members of Boko Haram at the College of Agriculture in Nigeria (2013). 
• September 29 is the birthday of Roman general/politician Pompey (106 BC), polymath Michael Servetus (1511), novelist Miguel de Cervantes (1547), English admiral Horatio Nelson (1758), physicist Enrico Fermi (1901), fashion journalist Diana Vreeland (1903), singer/actor Gene Autry (1907), director Stanley Kramer (1913), football coach Bum Phillips (1923), model/actress Anita Ekberg (1931), singer-songwriter/pianist Jerry Lee Lewis (1935), actor Larry Linville (1939), actress Madeline Khan (1942), violinist/composer Jean-Luc Ponty (1942), composer Mike Post (1944), singer-songwriter/guitarist Mark Farner (1948), TV host Bryant Gumbel (1948), animator Gábor Csupó (1952), journalist Gwen Ifill (1955), singer-songwriter/bass player Les Claypool (1963), actor Mackenzie Crook (1971), NFL player Calvin Johnson (1985), NBA player Kevin Durant (1988), and singer Halsey (1994).

That’s plenty for now. So look… this might be a weird week. Things might happen. I mean, things always happen, but I’m referring to things that end up being something that a future kid has to study for a U.S. History test. But as always, I advise you to stay strong, remain positive, and keep fighting for what’s right. If you want to know how, just ask me and I’m happy to give you specific advice. Enjoy your day.