Random News: April 20, 2024

DISCLAIMER: Zak's Random News is very random and doesn't cover many things, and not everything may be accurate, because I'm just some guy. Go find a real news source.

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Good morning. It’s April 20, 2024, and it’s a Saturday. I am back in my patented weekend morning aesthetic, which is a blue bathrobe, reading glasses, and a bemused smirk as I write my news and sip a second hot cup of Peet’s Major Dickinson’s Blend. Let’s see what there is to see.

• Happy 4/20. I used to smoke weed. I still do, but I used to, too.
• What is the origin of “420” as a stoner term? It’s really nothing spectacular. 
• In the early ‘70s, a group of friends at San Rafael High School in Marin County, CA, would meet each afternoon at 4:20pm to smoke the herbal essence. That term, possibly spread by traveling Deadheads from the area, went around the country. I was certainly aware of “420” while in high school in California a dozen or so years later in the mid-80s.
• Many of my fellow Gen X compatriots probably share the common experience of our parents not being around when we got off school, so 4:20PM was kind of an ideal time to get high.
• Fun Fact: there is proof of cannabis use for purposeful psychoactive effects going back over 2,500 years. It was burned and inhaled as part of a funeral ceremony.
• However, it goes back way, way farther than that. DNA evidence shows domestication of cannabis in western Asia more than 12,000 years ago.
• That means people were using early agricultural science to cultivate weed before they did wheat, corn, or potatoes. My theory is those humans got high, and then needed to grow some munchies. It adds up.
• Back to the present. Unlike those days from my youth, marijuana (aka cannabis, weed, pot, grass, green buds, the Devil’s lettuce, whatever you want to call it) is now legal in most of the USA.
• It’s completely legal for recreational use by adults in Alaska, Arizona, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Illinois, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, Montana, Nevada, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, Ohio, Oregon, Rhode Island, Vermont, Virginia, and Washington.
• In addition to the above, smoking marijuana is legal for medicinal reasons in Alabama, Arkansas, Florida, Hawaii, Louisiana, Mississippi, New Hampshire, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, South Dakota, Utah, and West Virginia. Several other states allow for use of CBD oil for medicinal use — Georgia, Indiana, Iowa, Kentucky, Tennessee, Texas, and Wisconsin — but not rolling the fat spliffs.
• The only states where weed remains fully illegal with possible criminal penalties for buying, selling, or using it are Idaho, Kansas, Nebraska, North Carolina, South Carolina, and Wyoming, and NE and NC have essentially decriminalized it.
• Here in California, I can choose between many various strains at a weed store, or even have weed delivered as I would a meal via DoorDash.
• Despite all that, marijuana remains a federal crime. It is a controlled substance under federal law, like heroin and fentanyl.
• We live in a weird country, man.
• There is a huge racial disparity In marijuana arrests that result in incarceration. Black and white people consume cannabis at about the same rates, but Black people are arrested for violating marijuana possession laws at nearly four times the rates of whites.
• Still to this day, a quarter million people get arrested for weed each year. That’s way down from times when it was criminalized in most states… like in 2007 when marijuana arrests hit their peak at over 870,000.
• It’s estimated that about 40,000 people in the USA are in jail over marijuana offenses at any given time. Many have problems later on with conviction records hampering their ability to get employment and more.
• That said, efforts are underway to remove cannabis as a federal Schedule I drug classification. 
• VP Kamala Harris called on the Department of Health and Human Services and the Department of Justice to hasten a reclassifying of marijuana from a Schedule I to a much lower-concern Schedule III drug.
• Fun Fact: there is a Congressional Cannabis Caucus. The bipartisan caucus was formed in 2017 by Republicans Dana Rohrabacher and Don Young and Democrats Earl Blumenauer and Jared Polis.
• They seek to harmonize federal laws that conflict with various state laws that permit medical and recreational cannabis.
• Alright. Cool man.
• Yeah.
• Wait, where was I? Oh yeah, the news.
• That wacky House of Representatives seems to getting more chaotic by the moment, but yesterday they cleared a key procedural hurdle in passing foreign aid to Israel, Ukraine, and Taiwan.
• The chamber voted 316-94 to advance the aid bills, setting up votes for today on final passage of $95 billion in foreign assistance that has been held up in a political fight in Washington for several months.
• The individual bills provide roughly $26 billion for Israel, $61 billion for Ukraine, and $8 billion for the Indo-Pacific. The measures are similar to legislation passed by a bipartisan group in the Senate back in February.
• This would seem like good news, unless you’re a far-right Republican. Then it’s a real fucking problem, and more of them are building an effort to remove Speaker Mike Johnson from his position as a result.
• Procedural votes like these are typically passed by the House majority alone, but the GOP are so busy fighting among themselves that they didn’t have the votes. Democrats had to step in to push the legislation forward. More Democrats voted to advance the bills than Republicans.
• So now, a third House Republican, Rep. Paul Gosar (R-AZ), announced his support for the motion to vacate the speaker's chair first introduced by Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) last month and endorsed this week by Rep. Thomas Massie (R-KY).
• We’ll see how it goes today. Moving on.
• A full jury of 12 people and six alternates was seated yesterday in Donnie Dump’s hush money case, and opening statements will start Monday in the first criminal trial of a former U.S. president.
• Donnie tried to wriggle out of it AGAIN late yesterday. He put in an appeal to halt the trial over his claims that jury selection was unfairly rushed.
• Appeal immediately rejected. Ha ha, fucker.
• The final five alternates who were selected yesterday include an unemployed married woman who’s into art and described herself as not political, an audio professional, a contract specialist, a clothing company executive, and a construction company project manager. It took four days of jury selection to find the 18 jurors.
• Seems about right.
• Per reliable reports, Sleepy Don not only fell asleep again during yesterday’s proceedings, but also farted a lot. Like, this was corroborated by many eyewitnesses- er, nose witnesses, who were present in the courtroom.
• Odor in the court!
• There was also some much less funny news that coincided with the trial: a man set himself on fire outside the courthouse.
• I saw a lot of people jumping to conclusions about who this man is and what his motivations were for self-immolation, setting himself aflame in the protest area across the street from the courthouse in lower Manhattan.
• But the guy, identified as Max Azzarello of Florida, was neither a MAGA nor a far-left protestor. He was, sadly, just a previously smart, highly educated guy who went insane over conspiracy theories. His manifesto was in regard to world government Ponzi schemes, fascist coups, and the like.
• Azzarello died from his injuries. Folks, I’ll tell you now… please never allow yourself to get so wrapped up in ideas — any ideas — to the point that they take over your life.
• Awful.
• So, while all that was going on, there was some important news in another of Dumpy’s many trials.
• New York Attorney General Letitia James has asked a judge to void the $175 million bond the El Dumpo secured to put off paying the larger monetary damage award in his civil fraud case.
• There’s no proof that the bond actually has the money to back it, something I predicted the day it was submitted. They can’t even show any collateral to back the bond.
• By the way, it’s not even close. New York state law says companies like the one Dumpy used can’t expose themselves to liabilities greater than 10 percent of their surplus.
• The company’s most recent annual financial statement is $138,441,671. At the 10% limit, the most they’re allowed to risk on a single case is $13.8 million. So Dump’s bond is short by $161.2 million.
• Can you imagine putting up a fraudulent bond for your fraud trial? Jesus.
• James said, “Based on the foregoing, the People respectfully request that the Court deny Movants’ motion to justify the surety, declare the Bond to be without effect and order that any replacement bond be posted within seven days, along with such other and further relief the Court deems necessary and appropriate.”
• Get his ass. Take his shit.
• Let’s move on.
• Very early this morning (and missing its midnight deadline, slow clap), the Senate voted to reauthorize Section 702 of the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act (aka FISA) by a vote of 60-34.
• President Joe Biden will swiftly sign the bill this morning.
• It’s an interesting example of legislation that both progressive and conservative lawmakers had problems with, and had previously refused to accept the version of the bill the House sent over last week, mostly in regard to warrantless surveillance.
• But members on both the House and Senate intelligence committees as well as the Justice Department warned requiring a warrant would severely handicap officials from quickly responding to imminent national security threats.
• I get it, I guess.
• Let’s do some good news.
• Yesterday, the Biden administration said it will restrict new oil and gas leasing on 13 million acres of a federal petroleum reserve in Alaska to help protect wildlife such as caribou and polar bears as the Arctic continues to warm.
• Excellent.
• Obviously this was met with anger from Republican lawmakers. Sen. Dan Sullivan (R-AK) called it an illegal attack on the state’s economic lifeblood, and he predicted lawsuits.
• Tough shit, pal. We all have to share this planet, and there’s no where else to go.
• And now, The Weather: “Bitter Melon” by Cola
• From the Sports Desk… After yesterday’s final play-in games — Miami beat Chicago 112-91, and New Orleans beat Sacramento 105-98 — the NBA playoffs are now set in stone.
• Eastern Conference: 1-seed Boston Celtics vs. 8-seed Miami Heat, 2-seed New York Knicks vs. 7-seed Philadelphia 76ers, 3-seed Milwaukee Bucks vs. 6-seed Indiana Pacers, and 4-seed Cleveland Cavaliers vs. 5-seed Orlando Magic.
• Western Conference: 1-seed Oklahoma City Thunder vs. 8-seed new Orleans Pelicans, 2-seed Denver Nuggets vs. 7-seed Los Angeles Lakers, 3-seed Minnesota Timberwolves vs. 6-seed Phoenix Suns, and 4-seed LA Clippers vs. 5-seed Dallas Mavericks.
• NBA playoffs start this morning!
• Today in history… Oliver Cromwell dissolves England's Rump Parliament (1653). Freedom of religion is granted to the Jews of New Amsterdam, now known as New York City (1657). George Washington arrives at Grays Ferry, PA while en route to Manhattan for his inauguration (1789). U.S. Congress passes an act creating the Wisconsin Territory (1836). Louis Pasteur and Claude Bernard complete the experiment disproving the theory of spontaneous generation (1862). William McKinley signs a joint resolution to Congress for declaration of war against Spain, beginning the Spanish–American War (1898). Manfred von Richthofen, a.k.a. The Red Baron, shoots down his 79th and 80th victims, his final victories before his death the following day (1918). On his 56th birthday Adolf Hitler makes his last trip from his bunker to the surface to award Iron Crosses to boy soldiers of the Hitler Youth (1945). Failure of the Bay of Pigs Invasion of US-backed Cuban exiles against Cuba (1961). Apollo 16 lunar module, commanded by John Young and piloted by Charles Duke, lands on the moon (1972). Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold kill 13 people and injure 24 others before committing suicide at Columbine High School in Columbine, CO (1999). Danica Patrick wins the Indy Japan 300 becoming the first female driver in history to win an Indy car race (2008). The Deepwater Horizon drilling rig explodes in the Gulf of Mexico, killing eleven workers and beginning an oil spill that would last six months (2010). Derek Chauvin is found guilty of all charges in the murder of George Floyd by the Fourth Judicial District Court of Minnesota (2021).
• April 20 is the birthday of physician/psychologist Philippe Pinel (1745), composer Georg Michael Telemann (1748), sculptor Daniel Chester French (1850), fashion designer Paul Poiret (1879), politician and genocidal maniac Adolf Hitler (1889), painter Joan Miró (1893), vibraphone player Lionel Hampton (1908), SCOTUS justice John Paul Stevens (1920), drummer Tito Puente (1923), actor George Takei (1937), actor Ryan O’Neal (1941), actress Jessica Lange (1949), singer-songwriter Luther Vandross (1951), MLB player/manager Don Mattingly (1961), actor Crispin Glover (1964), actor Andy Serkis (1964), drummer Mike Portnoy (1967), actress Carmen Electra (1972), musician Stephen Marley (1972), and NFL player Luke Kuechly (1991).

That’s way more news and info than you need. Now I’m having more coffee and taking a shower and doing various things that happen after that. Enjoy your day.